Her World

Chapter Twelve "Just Another"

   The air feels warm around me, yet I feel so cold, and my body feels brittle. It's so dark, am I alone? "Hello?" But no answer, I should just sit here until someone finds me. Didn't I die though? So why am I in this dark room, is it a room? I can't feel anything though, not even my own flesh. Just where am I? Huh, I hear faint voices way over there. "Hello, where are you?!" I need to find them, but I don't know where to start. 

   I get up and walk in any direction, feeling like I'm walking in circles. I continue to listen for those voices while walking, feeling more tired as I go along. I feel like I'm being slowed down, like there's a lot of weight adding on as I go. "What is that?" I see a small light way over there, huh that's also where those voices are coming from, so please say something again so I can be sure to follow. "Sky." A soft, whisper brushed passed my ears as I look at the light. "I'm coming." I say relieved that I feel like I recognize this voice, I begin running to the light, not caring what is on the other side. This heavy feeling gets heavier, and heavier, then pain begins coursing through me so I stop wondering why this is occurring. "It hurts." I wrap my arms around me because I'm feeling cold suddenly. "Sky.....please......wake up now." That soft whisper calls out again, but this person sounds so hurt. I need to go to this person, so I pull myself together and run to the light again. The light gradually gets closer, and closer, I push back all of these conflicting feelings running through me, but I don't want to be in this dark room forever, I can't be alone again, not now, not ever. 

   I finally reach the light, it feels warm, welcoming, safe. I take a step into the light, becoming absorbed in it. Like that I open my eyes to see a room with a few candles burning in each corner. I concentrate my breathing because my throat hurts so badly, I can't move my head. I notice someone leaning against my bed with their head in their arms, I guess they're sleeping. I open my mouth to speak to this person, but nothing comes out, just air. This pain pierces every inch of my skin, every inch inside of me. I muster strength to move my hand, but maybe they would like to sleep. I let them rest while I try to figure out why I'm in this condition. Laying there, blankly looking around not paying attention to anything in the room. Images suddenly pop into my head, Jason's face. I remember him, I will never let him leave my memories, he was a truly remarkable man, we only wanted our truths. I didn't see him where I was at, so I guess I didn't really die then. Remembering the last moment we shared together, my first kiss, we came close to actually knowing what it would've been like to just be humans. My thoughts are quickly clouded with that being's image, the one who I thought was my world, I thought I meant a lot in his world. Seeing his devilish image as I blacked out, knowing he killed me, just remembering that moment pushed fear into me, like massive wave pushing through a weak dam. I didn't realize I trembled when that person raised herself up from her sleep to look at me. It's Sarah! Tears leave my eyes as she quickly wraps her arms around me, "Sky I can't believe this!" Sarah says with a cracking voice. Although I am very weak, and in pain, I smile my brightest to let her know I am so happy right now. 

   Sarah lets me go then runs to knock on what I'm guessing is the door, it's out of my line of sight. She then whispers something to someone, then comes back to where she was sitting. "Sky I can't believe you're here awake!" I give a slight, slow nod to her. She grabs a hold of my hand, lightly squeezing it, "How are you feeling, thirsty?" I nod again, "I guess they were right when they said you wouldn't be able to speak." I nod again, my throat feels like a thousand bees stung it, and it inflamed into a balloon. "Well once Kana, and David come in we will tell you everything that's happened, I mean if you're up to it." I look at her, giving myself a moment to think if I want a third persons view about what happened. I then nod after my moment's up. Sarah nods to, "Okay, I'm just so happy you're with us again!" She says holding back tears, and I just smile in return trying not to cry since I am a horrid crier. 

   After a minute of silence Kana and David walk in while crouching down, I guess we're in a small room.

   "Sky, I'm so glad you're here with us!" Kana says as she grabs my hand and kisses it gently, then reaches up to kiss my forehead. She then sits down on the other side of my bed across from Sarah.

   "I thought we lost you forever!" David bluntly says as he wraps his arms around me, crying loudly, and the girls trying to shush him. They don't tell me anything yet but I'm starting to piece things together by how they're acting, to the condition of this room. David and the girls help me sit up at a low angle, the pain is intense but I push through. 

   "Sky, we won't ask much questions in consideration to your condition." David says, me, and the girls nod in agreement.

   "I'm guessing you still have your memories, all the way up til, you know, that day." I nod at him.

   "Well I'll start with what happened after Jason took you away from the rooftop." From there Sarah begins talking.

   "As we were all being detained and led down to the staircase I looked back at the Commander, he had walked over to the edge and watched you. His hand resting on the side of his leg, and he stayed like that until I walked passed the door. Then we heard a deafening roar come from the roof, it surprised not only us, but the soldiers as well." I understand that I hurt him, but he still didn't need to go to that extent of revenge.

   "Sky, we all know you both didn't mean to do what you did, so all of us who knew you two best stuck to the shadows as well when the commander released his bounty hunt upon the city, we tried keeping track of your location, but the soldiers had kept tabs on us. We couldn't go near you guys, nor help in any way. Each one of our connections were taken into detainment, so for those few days our hope to help dwindled morning, and night." I painfully remember getting no sleep because of the stress, and hunger. 

   David began speaking, "The Commander's determination to have your heads made it impossible to do anything. He kept all of us, and Jason's crew detained, and at the end of each day the soldiers brought in more people we know, more of our secret connections. It's like he already knew every detail every person's life. We all then agreed that there was to be nothing discussed about you two, even the captain took Sarah away for a day, only to bring her back in tears." I glance over at Sarah who is shaking from Davids statement.

   "The Captain had interrogated me, he had even threatened my life is I didn't tell him where you were fleeing to. I didn't budge though, I knew that if I told him anything, that they won. I couldn't let them get their way, and he knew that, so he just said very cruel things to me. Things I thought they didn't have the knowledge to know about human women, even the captain was determined to find you Sky."

   "Unfortunately they broadcasted the entire hunt in the detainment room, so we were forced to hear and see what was going on out there. They were all like animals, wild, rabid, crazed, blood thirsty. Running each building in and out, like a flood. When they found you two though, that was when it got worse. The soldiers would chime in on how the humans reacted, treated them like dogs, so if any people found you, the soldiers rushed the area. Luckily you two were perfect at escaping each attack before they got to the area. At an angle in the broadcast later on, we seen the Commander standing atop a building in the center of the city watching everything going down. Almost like he had a satisfied aura around him, almost like he liked the chaos that he can cause, in one day." I stare off at the wall in front of me thinking back at everything we both put through to survive, thanking the heavens that our friends stayed safe. All of our efforts, just to see that we were just a game to him, to me he's not worth naming anymore. Thinking about him hurts my mind, and my body, I guess that is what truly being broken feels like. 

   I get back to listening to David talking about the final day, "The soldiers then caught wind of you two running to the other side of the center, next thing we know we're seeing ships heading in your direction, along with hordes of people ready to fight for whatever possessed them to do this. Then we see the Commander's ship following behind slowly, the scene looked like something out of a nightmare. Then we saw you both surrounded by soldiers, we all felt our hearts sink at the same time. Seeing Jason push you to run, and you pulling him to go with you spoke so much for humanity. A symbol as we do this together, not alone." I started crying, leaning my head back, looking up at the ceiling. It's true, I didn't want to lose Jason, I didn't want to be alone, selfish as it may be.

 Sarah began speaking, "I'm sorry about Jason Sky, we all miss him. But he made us all promise that if anything goes down, we keep our heads down, since survival is important to us not the ones above. So when you fled, we saw how the soldiers grouped around Jason, picking him up, and stabbing their hands through him. Like he was a punching bag, I then knew that they would do the same to you, so that's when I got up and ran to the doorway. Everyone else followed, so we caused chaos of our own to get to you hopefully in time. We all pushed the two guards around, and broke out of the detainment room, and ran out into the city. We all split off into small groups, running as fast as we could to your last location. People were all running in any direction now, soldiers marching passed the center. We then overheard someone say that a group of people had you cornered in the old parking garage near the edge of the city, we then high tailed it that way. As we got closer, there was more and more ships, and soldiers arriving, and less and less people around. Almost like they wanted you for themselves, not the people, like the commander got the people riled up to get the effect he wanted. So we climb to the top of a nearby building to try and get a better look of where you are, and what is going on. Once we saw you, you were at the top of the garage, kneeling down near the middle, removing knives from all over you. The broke my heart, I tried to leave to help you but everyone kept me from doing so when they pointed at the commanders ship approaching. Seeing the group arrive seconds later to finish the job, only to be detained also by soldiers that got off the commander's ship. Seeing you look gravely injured was a traumatic sight, to be honest I had hoped that when the commander saw you, he would feel the need to save more then the anger he felt, I was wrong. It's like the world halted when he stepped off the ship, we were all stuck, hypnotized, stunned motionless, I felt small, too small to help. The moment I saw him walking towards you I saw him place his hand on his leg again, remember Sky, the place where he kept his medicine." I tearfully nod, shocked at what Sarah just said, he must have done that when I looked down at my wounds to see if I could stand up.

   "He ended up moving his hand away and continued his pace to you, you stood up and walked backwards from him, from his body language to me, it looked like he just got angrier the more he walked. Then he backed you against the wall and-" Sarah choked back her tears, as did I. David ended up finishing their points of view.

   "We helplessly watched as he grabbed you and ended you. We all screamed out, but it felt like we were screaming into nothing. He just took you from us, and when he was sure you no longer had a pulse, he just yanked his collar off of your body, and tossed you aside like you never mattered." David stopped to gather himself.

   Kana then started talking with a raised voice through her crying, "He could've saved you Sky, he could've forgiven you, he could've saved you! He gave himself a choice on your life, the one he practically raised!" She stops finding the strength to continue her words, but I know this pain too well. He did have a choice, but he saw that I was better off dead, I was better off not being in his world. It hurts, I wanted so badly to have freedom like him, to be his equal, to be by his side. He didn't see it like that though, but just another human that needed to be culled. My chest hurts from this, from him, it can no longer be the same. I am dead to him, nothing. 

   "He showed all of us that day that even someone close to him isn't anywhere close to being by him, everyone is below him. He showed everyone that he can erase his own pet without guilt, to further torment people into obeying him, fearing him."

   "You're alive for a reason Sky, after he left we all hurried to your body. We thought that you and Jason deserved a burial, not processing. But once we touch you, we felt a faint pulse, so we picked you up and took you away, into a small room we made from our closets. From then on we kept up on your nutrition, it's not that good, but it kept you alive." I nodded in thanks, they're right, I'm alive now. All I need is to get better and live again.

   "You've been in a coma for eight months now, and unfortunately, nothing good has happened since your supposed passing." 

   "Yeah, Sky the community you came from, the commander had it destroyed." I look at David, more with a questioning look then anything else, it's not like I really missed the place, nor was it anything special. 

   "The Commander had all of the people there processed, and the village destroyed, but what's more scary is the fact that the commander took in a pet from there." Now I glance at Sarah in shock, like oh god, that poor person. 

   "We don't know who it is but this all happened a few days after your death." Kana states while she makes herself a drink, she then offers everyone else one, but they just wave it away. "Alright, more for me."

   "Fortunately, the commander stopped paying attention to the city since that day. So it's been really lenient, now once you get better, you have to go under a disguise." I nod at David then lean my head back to process this information.

   "Well we'll let you rest Sky okay, but I'll come check on you in a while." I nod at Sarah, then we all give each other well needed hugs, then they head out. I lay there looking up at the ceiling again.

   The sunrise, it'll never mean the same thing to me anymore, it no longer means a new day or a fresh start. I died thinking about the one who meant the world to me, and the sunrise that shone too brightly on his armor, seeing it's reflection on his helmet as I took in my last view of him. My hopes, my future, my world all ended by him. He chose not to forgive me, he chose his path, and started a new. I can't though, my heart won't let me forgive, or forget. Now I just have to focus on getting healthy again, and visit where they buried Jason. With my reputation now, I will probably remain alone forever. But that's okay, I experienced love and that was enough for one lifetime. 

   As the days went on, my body slowly healed enough for me to move at a snails pace. But my throat isn't healing they way we wanted it to, I can breathe on my own now, but I still can't bring myself to make words. So I began using a writing board to communicate with everyone. Then my mental state took a turn south but also learning to use my voice again. I started having nightmares of that being, he would kill me over and over each night. This resulted in me having severe night terror like spasms, screaming in real life from him murdering me in my dreams, flailing my body in real life to escape his grasp in my dreams. Everyone had to wake me up and calm me down each night, which also resulted in me going into depression from not being able to control these dreams, or spasms. I have many thoughts of just wanting all of this to end so that this mental demon would leave me alone, thankfully though the guys are motivating me everyday to keep fighting to gain my second chance at life. They're right again, I am no longer the Sky I was nine months ago. I need to make myself into a new person, someone I can truly be proud, and say my thoughts and be outspoken. Never again let anyone take control of me. 

   As my poor health improved, I started on physical therapy. I started vocal lessons also, to which my voice is so low still, almost like I'm whispering but not completely a whisper, if that makes sense. Days filled with exercising, then nights filled with my mind racing through memories I desperately wish I can change. The dreams still happen, so I'm tired during the day, I take naps after eating so I can have energy. It's almost like the world outside doesn't exist anymore, I don't see it, I don't hear it, It's kept this way so no one finds out about me. I end up asking the guys how their days are after they get home, interested like they're a new book that just walked in. Then one day Kana walks in with fabric, and hair. We all stop what we're doing and stare at her with question marks on our faces, "What, this is for Sky." I just look at her with more confusion, like when did I say I wanted someone's hair.

   "Don't worry, the lady volunteered to give me her hair, I just told her I wanted to make a doll. So technically, I'm not wrong since Sky is like a doll heh!"

   Everyone just burst out laughing, I just smiled trying not to aggravate my throat, while shaking my head. 

   "Yeah Sky, let's make you a disguise so you can walk around outside and what not." I nod, then we examine all the neat stuff Kana brought back. Let's hope Kana knows what she's doing so I can see the outside again.