Her Rancher, Her Protector

Chapter 10 - Tyler

The next couple of days went by. I avoided Angel like the plague. Didn’t come back for breakfast as I knew she would be there. She left for work after breakfast and after Cory got on the bus, she would go to work. I could come in the eat lunch. I got Cory off the bus and he helped me till I knew his mother would be home shortly, so I send him in to do homework and I would go back to work. Every night, I would come in, minimal communication, she would cook. Than after we ate together, the three of us. When she was upstairs trying to get Cory to bed and I went to my study until I knew the coast was clear. Than I was in my room.

The naïve side of me thought we could live this way, no questions asked. Where I still had her close and safe. But kept my distances as I was now in love with her. Again naïve, cause the next day, while I was giving Cory lessons and letting him ride one of the horses, she came marching up, pissed. She was still in her uniform, it was obvious she just got off. She was now heading towards me like a bull seeing red. I was actually scared of the small girl at that moment. She got to me and shoved her finger in the chest as she yelled, “Who do you think you are, huh? Do you not realize what courage it took for me to be with you? It scared the s**t out of me, Tyler! I did and worried that things would change afterwards and they did.”

I was thrown by this. She was so pissed and still hurt. I stammered, “I...I am sorry, Angel.”

“Bullshit.” She hissed. “Do I, at least, get an explanation?” I got quiet and looked away. I couldn’t tell her I was freaking out because I loved her. “Fine. Don’t answer it.” She then turned away from me. “Don’t worry, Cory and I will be out your hair by this weekend.” She stormed off.

“Wait.” I rushed after her and grabbed her arm. I was getting upset now. “You can’t leave.”

She yanked her arm out of my hand. She was now really angry. “The hell I can’t. I am not going to sit here playing this cat and mouse game with you. You make this huge deal about us, than when we finally have s*x, you ignore me. That was my way of showing you I wanted all of you and I was giving you all of me.”

“Mama!” Cory was trying to get his mother's attention from the back of the horse.

“I know. I just freaked out.” I said, softly, not looking at her.

“Mama!”

“About what?” She asked me. I licked my lips as I looked at her and became nervous. She took noticed. She moved her hand into my cheek and I melted into her hand, I have missed her touch. “Of what, Tyler?”

Before I could reply, Cory screamed out for his mother again and I heard the horse, Thunder, get roweled up. He neighed out as he bucked. “Cory, hold on!” It was too late, Cory fell off and Angel and I ran to his side. I looked over him. He moved around and I asked, “Does anything hurt?” He nodded as I noticed he struggled to breath. “Where?” He put his hand on his chest. “That isn’t good. He could have a broken rib that punctured a lung.”

She asked him as she knew something I didn’t, “Baby, is your inhaler in your book bag?” He nodded as he wheezed. “And where is it?”

He pointed to the book bag that was hanging off the side of the fence. Angel rushed to it and dug in some pockets to find his inhaler as I cradled the boy up in my arms, so he was sitting up and relaxed. He was breathing heavily, and I worried about the boy. Angel came back as she was shaking the inhaler. She gave it to him. He put it to his mouth and pushed the button and took a deep breath. He did it a second time. Angel watched him closely as his breathing calmed. She smiled at him. “How you feel?”

The boy look tired and beat. “Tired, mama.”

She smiled and nodded. Then I told him. “I can make some chili, of course, mild. And you can eat in your room.”

He nodded. “Thanks, Tyler.”

I just smiled and nodded. We got him back to the house. Angel got him settled into bed as I made dinner. Once I was done, I made a tray for him. Angel came down and took it. Again, we really didn’t speak, but we did exchange glances. She was going to take Cory and leave me. I want to yell at her, tell her she was breaking my heart. But I also knew I had no right as I pushed away. I was such a hypocrite and hated myself for that. I went into my study, I needed to figure this out. Once in, I made myself a drink and sat at the desk. I looked at Maggie's picture. “Tell me what to do, Maggie. I don’t want to lose her or her son. You always knew what to do, so what the hell do I do. If you can give me guidance just one more time, even from beyond, I could really use it.”

I sighed as I knew better than to expect a response. I sat back in my seat as I looked at the picture. While looking at it, something hit me. Her note she wrote before she died. I didn’t know why, but I felt like I had to read it. I felt ready to. I opened the drawer that held the letter. I quickly took it out. On the envelope was my name in her writing. I turned it over and carefully opened it. I exhaled as I took it out. I put the envelope on the desk as I opened the folded up paper. I began to read it.

My dearest Tyler,

Today we went to the doctor and was given the grim news, my cancer has rapidly progressed to my lungs and organs. You took the news hard.

I teared up remembering this day. Remember how angry I was when we found out. Found out there was nothing that could be done.

I decided to stop treatment, you took that harder. You thought I gave up, but I didn’t. I just don’t want to live my last few weeks feeling so sick.

More tears spilled. I was angry with her for wanting to stop but I also respected her wishes at the time. But she knew I was angry at her as I thought she gave up.

Now, since my time is limited, I decided to write you this letter. I love you, Tyler. I always will. And I know you will always love me. But I also know you will love me so much, you won’t move on. Even though our dreams of a family and a long life together is not going to happen, that doesn’t mean it can’t for you. I know you won’t move on, Tyler. I know you won’t find someone who makes you happy cause I know you will think no one can. But I know she is out there for you. You are a good man, Tyler. I know you would make a wonderful father. So, don’t put your life on pause cause I am no longer here with you. Grieve, than move on. I know you will always love me and I will always love you. But I also know you have enough room in your heart to love again. So, move forward, baby. I want you to. I need you to. Live for yourself and if you find that special girl who makes your heart skip a beat as I once did, don’t run from it. Embrace it and I will look down, smiling. Cause you are happy and that is all I want for you. I want you to live your life.

Yours truly,

Maggie

I wiped the tears away as I knew, this was a sign. Angel was here and I was in love with her. I felt like I was betraying Maggie if I continued this. But only to know now, I wouldn’t be granting her, her last wish. Yeah, this was the sign I needed. As I sat back in my chair and I looked over my late wife’s letter.