You Will Be Mine (New Horizon Book 3)

Chapter 39: Gabe

Jeannie and I run into Garrett on our way out of the packhouse, and he falls into step with us as we head downstairs.

“Off to Indigo Moon, I presume?” I question him over my mate’s head.

“Yep,” he confirms gruffly with no further comment.

“Oh, the supply run thing,” Jeannie adds as though it has just occurred to her what we’re talking about.

“Yeah,” Garrett sighs in response.

I’m assuming that something happened between him and Leslie because he’s been weird like this for days where Indigo Moon is concerned, though he hasn’t bothered to tell me why. And it’s not for lack of my asking.

Jeannie’s puppy Kira decides to add in her own little yippy commentary, which seems to be all it takes to wipe the solemness off Garrett’s face.

“Oh my gosh, is this the puppy?” he asks in a sugary-sweet tone of voice.

It’s amazing to me how pups of all sorts seem to have that effect on people. He was grumpy not even a second ago, but now it’s all forgotten because he’s been distracted by something small and cute.

“Yep, this is Kira,” Jeannie tells him, reaching to take the puppy from me so she can show my brother.

And I try not to let her see how disappointed I feel about that. I got the puppy for her, but I’d be lying if I claimed I wasn’t already attached myself.

“She’s too adorable,” Garrett coos, pausing us just beyond the staircase on the way to the front door so that he can pet and fawn over Kira. “You did good, Gabe. She’s a little beauty.”

“Plenty of personality too,” I tell him, joining in on the puppy petting which seems to be what we’re doing now. “And even Simon loves her.”

“Oh wow, that is an achievement. I figured he’d be jealous,” Garrett says.

“Well, it helps that she’s female, but mostly it’s that face.”

Now it’s me using the sickeningly sweet tone as I talk about her. As soon as I realize that, I stop myself, clearing my throat as I take a step back. This pack’s future Alpha or Beta cannot be seen losing it over a wolf pup. She’s not even a werewolf pup. I’m supposed to hate her, or at least feel territorial and put off by her, and yet here I am powerless to resist her.

“She does need to get outside to relieve herself though,” Jeannie reminds me. “So, that’s what we’re off to do, and then going over to see Clarice.”

“I wish I could join, but you know, duty calls and all that,” Garrett tells her, suddenly back to his previous sighing, melancholy self. “But I’ll be interested to hear all about it when I get back.”

He reaches out as if to give her a hug, and my possessive instincts kick in. I feel a lot better after we talked things out yesterday, but that doesn’t mean I’m comfortable with him having his paws all over my mate just yet.

Jeannie glances over at me, and I feel my features soften and my muscles relax a bit. She’s never asked my permission before, but the look on her face tells me that’s exactly what she’s doing now. That seems to make all the difference, and I give her a nod of approval to let her know it’s okay. It still bothers me a little, but not enough to be selfish and prevent it.

And she smiles back at me. No, more like beams back at me. That small facial expression feels like it changes everything. Well, it at least makes me feel loads better about her being affectionate with my brother. He’s obviously important to her, and I guess I’m starting to be kind of important to her too since she checked to see how I felt about it first.

I notice movement out of the corner of my eye and glance up to see Gabby standing at the top of the stairway that leads to the other wing of the packhouse, glaring down at us. She couldn’t have chosen a worse time to show up, considering that my mate is currently embracing her rejected mate. I glare back at her though, and she turns on her heel and stomps away before either Jeannie or my brother notice her.

Thankfully, her mate scent disappeared when she rejected him, or he would have already known she was coming before I even saw her. I get the sense from how he’s been acting that a reminder of what he has lost is the last thing he needs today. And I’m not planning on telling Jeannie that I saw her either. I don’t want her worrying about that stupid promise she made to Beta Ryan, and nothing is going to happen to her as long as I’m with her anyway. I’ll make sure of it.

After we part ways with Garrett, I lead Jeannie off in the direction of Clarice’s, and we let Kira stop and do her business along the way. She seems to have a lot of business to do for such a small thing, but she’s also funny about it, so I really don’t mind pausing and waiting for her.

“Why Kira?” I finally take the opportunity to ask Jeannie what I’ve been wondering ever since she told me what she named the puppy.

I get the sense that names mean something to her, and I’m curious why she thinks Kira is the right one for this hyper little girl. I have to admit that it suits her, though I wouldn’t have personally thought up something quite as nice. If it had been left to me, she’d probably be called Lil because she’s small, and she will always be smaller than any of the wolves of the people around here.

“Because it’s her name,” Jeannie says, as if that explains anything. But when she catches sight of the confusion written all over my face, she adds, “Every creature has a true name.”

I feel my eyebrows shoot up with the surprise I feel, though it’s mixed with lingering confusion, and thankfully she goes on explaining it to me some more.

“Have you ever wondered why parents struggle to come up with names for their babies, and even go as far as to fight about it? And they’ll comment things like, ‘No, that doesn’t feel right,’ or suddenly change their minds about a name they picked out before the child was ever conceived. It’s because the child’s true name is the only one that ‘feels right’ to both parents as it’s the one they were always meant to have. The same is true for all animals, though only those that are meant to be pets for people will have human names.”

And though it sounds strange to hear, that actually makes a lot of sense. I’m guessing that the rest of us struggle because we don’t have Jeannie’s connection to living things, but even us bumbling fools will eventually land on the right name for someone or something if given enough time to figure it out.

“So, we don’t really ‘choose’ the names we give things,” I state as what she’s saying starts making increasingly more sense in my head.

“No, they’re given to us,” she affirms, giving me a smile that tells me how much she appreciates me trying to understand this tiny little part of her world.

“But you have a stronger connection than most to whatever it is that gives out names,” I point out, not even needing to ask. I can already tell the truth of it, although I do still have a question. “What is it that does that anyway?”

“I honestly don’t know,” Jeannie admits. “I suppose it could even be your Moon Goddess, at least where werewolves are concerned. Whatever or whoever it is doesn’t seem to matter though. I just focus on the connection that I feel to a creature, and in time, the name just pops in my head. So, I didn’t choose to name her Kira. It was revealed to me.”

“Do you even like calling her Kira though?” I can’t help wondering now. Most of us get to experience the satisfaction of thinking we came up with a name on our own, but I’m guessing she never has.

“I can’t imagine calling her anything else, and she probably would just get confused by it anyway.”

“But that doesn’t answer whether you like it.”

“I do. It’s a pretty name, and I think it suits her perfectly,” she assures me, crouching down to pet Kira’s ears since she’s just run over to us as if this conversation has summoned her. And I suppose it probably has, considering how many times we’ve said her name.

We continue on in silence for a bit, though it’s not an uncomfortable silence. We’re just watching Kira chase on ahead, and then get distracted by a bird or a leaf or something, chasing after that for a few seconds before remembering that she’s supposed to be “leading” us, though she doesn’t even know where we’re going.

“It’s just over this way,” I tell Jeannie, pointing down the path that leads to Clarice’s.

Kira seems to have gotten the message as well, though I suspect that’s because of Jeannie. She skids to a stop before turning and hopping off in the direction of the path I just pointed out, randomly tripping and tumbling over some invisible obstacle along the way. Rolling herself back over and up on her feet, she turns and growls at that spot in the ground as if it has wronged her, and Jeannie and I can’t help laughing together at the show she’s putting on.

I also can’t help the warmth spreading through me as I wonder if this is a glimpse of what it will be like to have pups of our own someday. Kira’s a whole other species, but I can’t deny the similarities between her and werewolf pups. Lots of energy, a unique little personality, and endless entertainment and frustration for the parents as they get to observe and shape how the pups learn to interact with the world.

But I suppose first I need to have a chat with my mate about where we stand and whether she’s even interested in pursuing that sort of relationship with me. I know the talk we had Saturday night was a major setback for us, and we still haven’t taken the opportunity to revisit all the feelings that rose to the surface that night. Garrett has told me little bits and pieces, mostly just that his advice remains the same – I have to learn how to let my guard down around Jeannie and figure out how to stop acting the charming playboy that I am with other women.

She’s not them, and though I know that, it’s also hard for me to let all that go. Old habits die hard, especially when those habits are actually defense and coping mechanisms meant to keep people at arm’s length, which is another tidbit of Garrett's wisdom that I've been chewing over since yesterday. The problem is I don’t want to keep Jeannie out, but I’m also kind of scared to let her in. Very few ever get to know the real me, and it’s been so long since I’ve been in touch with that part of myself that I don’t know if I even remember that guy anymore.

I tried, or I thought I did, when I took her to the theater, but look how that ended up. My instinct is to retreat even further into myself now, but I also recognize that I could lose her completely if I do that. She can see right through me, and I guess she told Garrett that she doesn’t feel like she can connect to me when I'm projecting that fake persona. It kind of broke me to learn that she's struggling to connect to me, her mate, the person it should be easiest for her to bond with because we literally have a mystical force connecting us and acting to pull us together.

I’ve been making my best effort to just hold my tongue when the only thing I can think of to say sounds more like a flirty line or a joke meant to deflect serious conversation, and I feel like that’s been a good first step. It's been a couple days since I've seen her give me that conflicted, almost hurt look that she would give me whenever I’d make stupid fluff comments like that, so I’m guessing that she appreciates even that seemingly small, simple change.

But with Clarice’s house just ahead, I know it’s time for me to push all that aside for now. Right now, I need to focus on whatever answers lie on the other side of that familiar door, for both Jeannie’s sake and mine. The fact that Clarice wanted to meet with us both tells me that she has something of substance to tell us, and I can’t help but feel excited, anxious, and maybe even a little bit of dread. Answers are welcome, but they could also change our lives as we know them.

Maybe I’m being a little dramatic about that, but there has to be some reason why Jeannie’s been kept in the dark about who and what she is, and I can’t help worrying about what that reason could be.

“This is the place,” I tell Jeannie, who seems to pass it along to Kira.

We make our way up onto the porch as Kira runs her way back to us. The pup seems to be in good physical form despite her youth. She makes quick work of bounding up the stairs and wiggling her way across the porch, her nails clicking against the wood as she goes.

Not long after I knock on the door, Elder Gerard opens it, giving us a warm, welcoming smile as he steps back to invite us in.

“You’re just in time to hear what I was about to tell your father,” Clarice tells us, making her way across the foyer to hug us both.

I glance around her to catch sight of a familiar arm just beyond the doorway to the dining room, and that coupled with his scent tells me that Matt is the father she speaks of. I had no idea he would be here, though I’m not sad to see him. Maybe he has even more answers for us about whatever he saw in Jeannie’s memories.

“Jeannie, I presume?” Clarice cuts through my investigative thoughts, reminding me that I’ve forgotten my manners and failed to introduce my mate.

Jeannie nods and gives her a nervous smile, and my arm automatically shoots out to wrap around her shoulders and try to provide her whatever comfort I can. She stiffens at first, but relaxes into me after only a couple seconds.

“I’m Clarice, and this is Gerard, my mate,” Clarice provides her own introductions, gesturing behind her at Elder Gerard.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” Jeannie responds politely, giving Elder Gerard a quick glance and nod as well.

“Please, come and join us in the dining room, and I’ll bring some lunch right out,” Clarice offers invitingly, and gives Jeannie a gentle nudge into the other room.

My dad pulls out a chair and helps her sit, leaving me feeling like I’m dropping the ball yet again. But quite honestly, I don’t know where to draw the line when it comes to the difference between “manners” and “acting fake” when it comes to how Jeannie will perceive me, and that leaves me hesitating just long enough for others to step in and pick up what they must see as my slack.

I take the chair next to Jeannie, chuckling when I hear Elder Gerard talking to Kira out in the hall.

“You’re much softer than I thought you’d be,” he coos at her, and she gives him a sassy little bark.

I could swear that she understands what we’re saying, though I have no explanation for how she does it.

“Well, I’m sorry, but I don’t know much about wolf pups,” he apologizes to her. “So, please excuse my ignorance.”

An Elder just apologized to a puppy. That’s something I never thought I’d witness.

“This over here is for you,” he tells her next, and I presume he means the bed and water that Clarice promised she’d have ready for her. “I’d appreciate if you could stay out of the dining room while we eat, but I do understand if you find that to be an insulting request and choose to ignore it.”

Jeannie giggles beside me, apparently overhearing the same conversation I am.

“She thinks he’s funny,” she whispers to me, and I hear Matt chuckle softly as well. “And so do I. How very polite of him.”

I take her hand under the table and give it a gentle squeeze, smiling at her and appreciating the way her eyes are twinkling right back at me. Clarice comes in with the food, and Elder Gerard joins us as well once he’s finished with the puppy princess.

My day seems to have taken a major upward turn now that I’ve got my mate, what smells like a mouthwatering lunch sitting right over there, and some damn good company to share it with. All that’s missing is those answers we came for, starting with whatever Clarice was about to tell my dad when we showed up.