Fall in love and other problems

Chapter 10: "In love with you"

   When I return to my house, I arrive, I put the motorcycle in the garage and there I go into the house, apparently they had all left their schools, and Dad and Mom from work.

Their schools? If they all go to the same.

   I mean Kiara and Alexa, Sarita genius.

Oh, true.

"Hello" greeting not very animated.

"Hello" say the twins, mom and dad.

"Ug" I go upstairs and lock myself in my room, Laura, David and Santiago did not say hello, what did I do to them? Well, I didn't do anything to Laura and she still didn't greet me.

   Apparently I fell asleep because I feel the knock on the door and I am lying on my bed and I am not wanting to get up but I get up reluctantly and when I open it is Cameron, I do not let him pass, I just settle into the door frame, standing there .

"Than?" I say cold and not even looking at him.

"Hey, I'm supposed to be the one who must be mad at you" I look him up and down and squint until he finally speaks.

"By...?" I wave my hand as if telling him to keep talking.

"For not telling me that you have a boyfriend?" I laugh coldly and dryly, without grace, for a few seconds.

"What strange truth?" I look up with a finger on my chin, thinking. "Because I don't even have a boyfriend - I look at him angrily and he seems to be confused".

"What do you mean not ...?" I deny again but only with my head. Chad told us you were his girlfriend.

"What Chad did what ?!" I practically scream. "He's not my boyfriend, but apparently you decided to believe him instead of your "best friend", right? I do not know, I say because you do not even talk to me, or look at me, it is as if it did not extend, not today, not yesterday in the race and it has been coming for a few days. What did I do? Or why are you like this?"

"No, but he was coming ... because ... I don't want you to think that ..." I interrupt him because I have to speak, I have to tell him.

Finally.

   This is going to ruin our friendship.

Maybe yes, maybe no.

   Most likely, yes.

"Enough of the detours, enough! I don't want to be Chad's girlfriend because I'm in love with someone else" I think about it for a few seconds, I don't know whether to tell him.

Decide it.

   I do not want.

DECISION.

   What if he doesn't talk to me anymore?

T E L L H I M!

"And you never told me?" that question the only thing that makes me angry more and more. "It shows that our friendship matters to you ..." I interrupt him because I no longer give more.

It was time.

   You shut up.

Well.

   WELL.

"That person is you useless" I speak quickly. "It's you, damn, damn, damn. It's you, it was always you. Since I have memory, unfortunately since I have memory, it's you and I'm in love with you".

"Are you ... in love ... with ... m-me?" I had never seen him nervous like at this moment, in fact, I had never seen him nervous at any time. "I mean, are you serious? Are you seriously in love with me? But are you sure?" I roll my eyes at the amount of questions, it bothers me.

"Are you asking me if I'm sure? Are you seriously asking me that? I tell you that I have been in love with you for as long as I can remember and you ask me if I am sure, you are incredible" this guy sticks my head out, I can't be more angry than I am right now, he treats me like he doesn't know what I'm saying . "If I'm sure, I'm very sure, but I have no idea why I just told you. Forget everything, bye" I wave at her but when I try to close the door, Cameron puts her foot so she can't.

"No, wait, wait a second" I roll my eyes but there I am waiting. "I am also in love with you" I laugh at his confession, because I know he tells me out of compassion.

"Seriously?" He nods. "Are you sure?" he nods again and I laugh again. "It does not show since today you were very affectionate with Melanie Griffith" I spit her name with disgust, we were always something like "enemies". "You are not in love with me, you may feel bad about what I just told you and you want to make me feel better but that is not what I need. I don't need you to feel sorry for me, much less lie to me".

   Before she can say a word, I close the door in her face, so she does not see how I break inside and my tears come out. He needed to do it because if he already felt sorry for me, I can't imagine it if I start crying in front of him.

At least you told him.

   Yes, it completely ruined the only traces that could have been left of a relationship of friends but hey, at least I told him.

Already lying on my bed, at that moment I remember one of the things he said to me "Chad told us you were his girlfriend." Oh Chad, I'm going to kill you as soon as I see you, that's for sure.

   What if none of your brothers greeted you today for that? Laura, Santiago and David.

Damn you're right.

   I know.

   It's more than clear that I can't wait until school tomorrow to talk to him, so I call him. I don't want to tell you over the phone, but I need to do it now.

Phone call

"Hello!"

"Chad?"

"That is my name".

"I know".

"Then why did you say it as a question?"

"Never mind".

"What happens? Why do you call me?"

"Do you want to go to a Starbucks?"

"Yes, in a while I'll go out then".

"Come on, you and I have things to talk about".

"Okay?"

End phone call

   I cut him off without even saying bye and I hope you noticed. I'm going to take all my anger out on him, and I do accumulate a lot. He doesn't have to say those things, he doesn't have to tell lies, and I want to know why he did it.

   When I got to Starbucks, Chad was already sitting there at one of the tables and when he saw me he gestures for me to come over to him, which is exactly what I do.

"Hello" he greets me with a kiss but I don't return it and she looks at me strangely. "What happens?"

"Yes, I have a boyfriend and I didn't know, can you believe it?" I speak as soon as I sit down, he looks at me and I see that he gets half nervous, moving his leg, playing with his hands and not being able to look at my face so I continue. "And above, listen to this, above that such boyfriend is you. What a coincidence, right? I still can't believe it" he still doesn't speak, which bothers me more than if he did. "You were speechless because of what I see".

"Uh ... I don't know what to say, really. I really like you" that hits me like a bucket of cold water, which reminds me of when my beloved and beautiful brothers threw one at me while I was sleeping peacefully.

Focus.

   Yes, that, you're right.

"I don't understand, I really don't. And what did you want to be your girlfriend by force or what? Because saying that, it seems to be what you wanted and I don't understand why. What are you looking for?" he does not answer me and it drives me crazy. "What are you looking for ?!" I speak a little louder.

"I don't know, like it" he seems sincere, but I still don't understand how he wanted to do it that way.

"And how did you hope to achieve it? Making me mad because I fight with all my friends and brothers? What did you want? What am I going to get you when I feel bad?" when I say that, Chad moves his head to the side as if affirming that what I said is true. "Didn't it seem more normal to ask me out? Or at least not lying?"

"Let's see, I don't know how to do these things" I roll my eyes and look at him angrily before answering him.

"I think it is more than clear that by lying you never get anywhere" he nods.

"I know, and I'm really sorry. It was not my intention that you fight with anyone, if I want to see you well. But I know that your best friend likes you because of the way he looks at you, I mean come on, everyone knows" I let out a dry laugh.

"Everybody knows? It is a joke?"

"Don't tell me that you hadn't noticed before, everyone knows that they like each other" thanks to that I start to reflect.

When your friends told you they were both stupid for not realizing it.

   That's what I was thinking.

When your mom said that while you and Cameron were lying on the bed.

   I was also thinking about that.

"The point is, I like you. If I fell in love first, if you want my bike I'll give you my bike…" I interrupt him.

"Let's see, I don't want your motorcycle, I don't want your damn motorcycle! I want you to go back in time and you didn't say that".

"I know and I'm sorry again, sorry, sorry, sorry and I mean it. But I'm sorry to tell you that I like you, I love that you love motorcycles like me, that you liked going to the race, your humor and bad humor, how you sing, how you get lost in your thoughts. I would like you to like me, but from what I see it is not like that" he looks down, he seems sad, but I can't do anything, I can't force myself to like someone I don't like, I just can't. "What do you want me to do?"

"I don't know, nothing" I can't think of what else to say to him at that moment.

"If you want, I'll talk to Cameron and tell him the truth, that I make it up, I'll tell him everything. But please let me fix it" I don't know if he wanted to keep talking or not but I cut him off.

"No, I don't want you to talk to him. Let's leave it here, I can't stay close to you right now, I'm not well - and it's true, I'm not saying that it was all his fault, but a large part of my problems right now were because of him".

"But I don't want to get away from you".

"But I need it" he lowers his head again and just nods, that's my time to go so I take advantage of it.

   I do a couple of blocks until I stop and decide to text Cameron to see where we can meet.

Me: Hello

Me: Cami

Me: Are you ??

Me: I need to see you, where are you?

Cami: That will be a bit impossible

Cami: On a plane, going to Spain

Cami: I'm going back to my dad

   When I read that message, I was in a kind of shock, and consequently the cell phone slipped from my hands and fell to the floor. I take a few seconds to compose myself and I grab him again to speak to him again.

Me: AND WHEN DID YOU TELL ME ???

Me: damn

Me: you left without saying goodbye damn it

Cami: I was going to say goodbye today

Cami: When you slammed the door in my face

Me: you can't go

Me: you are my best friend

Cami: Not anymore, apparently you already changed me

Me: I told you it was his invention

Cami: There

Me: No it's not !!!

Me: There is nothing, nothing is

Me: You don't believe me, I can't believe it

Me: After so many years of friendship, you don't believe what I'm saying.

Me: Although I don't know if I can believe you either, you never told me about the races

Me: Can't you go please

Cami: I'm already on the plane Sara

Cami: I don't know what you expect me to do

Me: but i need you

Cami: I'm going to finish the year in Spain, I don't know what I'll do next

Me: But Cam is back

Cami: I don't know, we'll talk later

   I read your last message but I no longer answer it, it has no use. And that's how they completely destroyed me, I think most likely that was my last little part, but not anymore. I need him ... I need him too much, much more than he or anyone imagines. This is not something that he could have decided from one moment to the next, he must have been thinking about it for a long time and he never told me, why did he never tell me about this?

   Not that I have a dependency relationship with him, but we were never apart for long. When he went to visit his family in Spain I almost always went with him. If we went on a trip he would come with me or the other way around, it was like that. Always together, always inseparable, but not anymore. And the truth is that it all started the day Chad arrived.

I said Chad would cause trouble.

   And it caused them, perhaps not maliciously but it did.

   What I am going to do? I don't realize I'm crying until a granny comes up to me and talks to me.

"Darling, are you okay?" I just nod, but I must be horrible crying. "Oh you're not, lovesick?"

"Yes, but I'm fine ma'am, don't worry".

"Look, first love is tough. Sometimes it is the love of your life and other times just your first disappointment. The only thing I know for sure is that the first love is not forgotten" while he talks to me, he leads me to some seats and there we actually sit. "How long have you known your first love?"

"Since I can remember" I answer smiling.

"That's worse, because you really know him. If they grew up together, you know everything about him ... or about her, I will be old but I believe that love feels it and expresses itself in any way" that makes me smile, I like that people already accept you without knowing those things.

"Thank you very much, also he, his name is Cameron".

"Well, you know everything about Cameron I'm sure" I nod and now it's her who smiles at me. "You know his defects and his virtues, you know how he responds and handles herself in different situations, you know how he is angry, happy, sad, jealous, and you also know how to treat him in those moments. It's as if you know everything, but at the same time you don't know anything because you don't know if he feels the same way for you as you do for him".

"You're right, because that happens to me".

"I met my first love when I was 15 years old, which was 54 years ago. We fell in love like the two young teenagers that we were. He is the same age as me, but at 18 he had to go to war. By that time we were already dating".

"And what happened?" I ask slowly and slowly when I see that he no longer continues with the story.

"We said goodbye, but he returned 6 years later. Was he still in love? I think even more than before. In those years when he was physically absent, we wrote letters to each other when we could and he felt close when he wasn't. I couldn't forget it, I never could and I didn't, I never will. He came back and we were married, as we wanted to do for a long time. Richard passed away 3 years ago, but I love him like the first day and more. You never forget first love, no matter how the story ends".

"What a beautiful story".

"What I mean by this, miss, is don't give up. I don't know what happened, but if you've known each other for as long as you told me, since you were so young, and if you're really in love with him, don't give up. Do not give up" the last thing he says to me looking into my eyes, smiling while he slaps my knee three times with his hand, I feel so close to this woman, she understands me more than any of my friends. You love him?

"Yes".

"Do you mind?"

"Yes".

"How does it make you feel?"

"As the most cared, happy and loved person in the world" I speak without thinking. "Although I don't know now".

"If so, do what you can to make her go back to how she was before" when she finished saying that she got up and I got up with her. "I hope it helped you to talk with an old woman".

"It really helped me a lot. And I bet her husband is in heaven smiling in love with the beautiful things she has said about him".

"I hope so, but I also want to tell you that it will never be all rosy. Everything cannot always be perfect, there are going to be ups and downs. Whether with him or with anyone else, it is not a question of love but of situations, the only thing they have to do in those moments when they are low is to overcome it together, talk and be with each other. I think that's the only thing I can say. Don't give up, fight for what you want and if something doesn't happen, it's because it didn't have to happen and something better will come in the future".

>> "Don't expect everything to happen now, at this precise moment. All things take time, but remember that if it has to be, it will be and that is the end of things. You will be fine, whatever happens you will be. Maybe this was what you had or wanted to hear or maybe not, but I don't like to see people cry and if I can get them to stop I will help. Apparently it worked with you because you are smiling, do not forget that there will always be someone to talk about your problems with, always, at any time or place, a person you know or will not be there for you, I know".

"Thank you very much for everything, for your beautiful words and anecdotes" I smile at her and she hugs me.

"Well, I have to go but I will remember you as the girl who listened to me when I needed her and me. Thank you, little girl".

"Thank you please" greets me and leaves, and there I am with a thousand thoughts in my head.

   When I wake up a little, I decide to go home. I need to talk to my mom while I am lying on my bed and she stroking my hair. I need it.

   That woman was the best chance that could have happened.

   I know, I also know that I don't believe in coincidences and she was there for a reason, I don't know how to explain it but that's the way it is.