Love at the Nth Time

Endless Tears to Antidote

Chapter 28

"Celine." The grip of Seth on my wrist loosened till my arm lowered. She smiled a little, and added, "You can change now. I'll wait for you here." I nodded and sauntered through the door. My hand clenched on the gown as I helped myself not to step on it. My heart throbbed. Even Seth realized the truth.

Not enough courage to face Seth's colleagues, I felt secure, staying in the car. All of my insecurities devoured me. I clicked my tongue and controlled the negative trait built up after breaking up with Ryan. That bastard, it's not good for my mental health to remain conscious of my physical looks.

"I like your body, not your face. You, ugly b***h," irritated voice Ryan flashed in my memory. I wailed a little and wiped the tears which dripped down my cheeks. I thought of socializing with Seth's circle. It retched me.

It hurt every time Seth teased me concerning my looks and compared me to other girls whose preferred style I did not meet. What's different between that ex-boyfriend and Seth? I tried not to think of it, comparing myself to them, yet being with Seth. I kept repeating the same heartbreaks and inner wounds.

Okay, yes, I liked Seth, but was it not enough to have a crush on her?

"Okay," I murmured, picking up the spare clothes I brought with me in the backseat. It was an embarrassing night for me, all of the time being with Seth. Worse, it was her birthday. I groaned a little and controlled my emotions as it was hard to get out of the car in my current state. I checked my face in the compact mirror. On my way to the restroom outside the venue, Johann saw me.

"Celine." I stopped near the restroom to meet him. "Are you changing clothes?" I nodded.

"It's uncomfortable."

"Ha? It suits you, and you're not the only one wearing gowns and dresses that Seth made. Why don't you show it off?" I glared at him. He had no idea.

"I wasn't informed. If I arrive early, they'll force me to walk along the runway. What did I know about modelling, and with this height?" I rolled my eyes and stepped forward.

"Sorry, it suits you. Don't you know the sketch model of the dress had short hair similar to yours?" I looked up at Johann. He nodded.

"So?" I entered the restroom.

The business I ventured into wore a different hat. It could be a student, employee, business owner, doctor, or artist. I could keep up with anyone even if I wore a plain round-neck shirt and jeans. My hair was in a bun, and I let the tiny strands of it fall into the frame of my face. Spell comfy. Johann waited for me, and he carried the gown to the car.

"Did Seth know you changed?"

"Yes, she approved it." A slight tilt of my head on the other side to express displeasure that Seth did not even insist.

A sight of Seth circled with friends in modelling, similar to tall trees gathered together in one place. I smiled at my way of ridiculing the unfair world.

"Where's Win," I uttered as glimpses of eyes on me, trying to stand my ground. Johann held my wrist and pulled me onto the wine stand.

"Which do you prefer, wine or juice?" asked Johann.

"Wine," I replied. He picked up a glass of wine for both of us. I giggled a little. I was in the mood to have fun now. "Let's go grab snacks. The wine must complement it," I added as we stepped on the way to the long table.

"I know cheese is good with wine," said Johann, who picked up the thong and put the various cheese on a small plate. I laughed a little, as he had no idea what he was doing, neither did I, taking all kinds of cheese.

"Celine." I looked at Seth and pulled by her as she dragged me away. My heart pounded nervously.

"Ah, w-wait, Seth!" She stopped walking and faced me. "What's wrong? You can talk to me nicely," I pleaded in hesitation. It's already distressing to mind the eyes of others around us, and I might break up if Seth embarrassed me more.

"So, you really allowed that man to court you? Or you're his already?" It happened. I couldn't look away from the floor, and her angry eyes pierced at me.

"Why wait, why are we gonna deal with that here?" It's her birthday. Oh please, I didn't want to fight with her. My eyes stung as tears threatened to get out. It wasn't easy to lift my eyes, not to lock eyes with others.

"Answer me! This is my day, so don't ruin it. If you wanna flirt around, then leave." My breathing was unsteady. I bit my lip to control my emotions, repeating words of encouragement not to cry in the middle of a crowd. I shut my eyes and shook my head.

"I, I'm not flirting with anyone, Seth. I don't have anyone I know here," my voice trembled. I pulled my feet to leave the place.

Hands quivered as I started the auto. I just hoped the luck of safety would guide me as I drove on the road. I'd go a bit far from the venue and calm down. Wailed came out and pulled over the auto in front of a closed store.

Seth was so crazy, a despicable asshole. Aware that our close relationship set no walls of keeping silence, but this was too much. Imposing a false identity in front of other people they'd believe in, as their side would never be on me. I would worry about what they would say in a couple of days, I'd forget the thought of it. Still, the emotions Seth left in me would add to the doubt of feelings I prioritized solely for her.

My phone rang inside my bag. I forgot to say bye to Win and Johann, and the guy treated me nicely. Chinnie had conflicts with Seth, but it didn't mean Seth had to put meaning into his kindness. So what if Johann held an interest in me?

I picked up the phone and saw Seth's missed call. I ignored it and the message Win about my leaving and the present I brought for Seth. It's on the single couch where Seth first saw me tonight. I had not greeted her yet. I no longer had a reason to.

I laid my forehead on the steering wheel and closed my eyes. Win was searching for me because Mr Tim asked my whereabouts. Why didn't he ask his great daughter? Of course, I'd never want to ruin her special night. I scoffed, realizing I was about to destroy it. My phone lit up in my grip. I looked at it and saw the message from Seth.

Message

Seth: Celine, I'm sorry. Please, let me see you. Let's talk, please

Exhausted all day, in addition to waking up early and working my butts off, this rich, arrogant, self-centred woman had the world seem like it only revolved around her. Seth called me again. I answered it.

"What??"

"Celine, I'm sorry." It's quiet in her background. There was soft music. Was the event already ended, or was she far from the area? I took a deep breath.

"It's okay. Your gift is with Win." No energy to quarrel with her.

"Hey, please let's meet. Where are you now?"

"I don't wanna ruin your night. I'm going home." I bit my lip not to wince.

"No, no, it's not like that. I didn't mean to say that."

"It's fine, Seth. I understand." I actually don't. A slight hiccup came out of me.

"Celine, please let me see you. I'm so sorry," her voice trembled.

"I-it's my fault I asked Johann to accompany me, e-even if you have issues with his cousin. I'll go to the company to return the gown and all." I covered my mouth as I cried in silence. I was putting away the phone in my ear. It's not good for me to be with Seth. I didn't intend to blame myself, but my feelings for her considered the consequences of rejecting her when she tried to have a way with me.

"Please, let me see you now." I paused from crying as her cries turned louder than mine. I gulped the lump in my throat and leaned the phone near my mouth. I saw the signage of the store in front. "Stay there, please. I'm on my way." A click of a car key and a door shut. I was convinced she had been with her auto all this time.

Another light came from the Audi I became familiar with as it's the car she always used whenever we're together. The last message begging me not to leave, I put down the phone on the chair as we both opened the door of the sedan, and she pulled me into a tight embrace, carrying my weight to get out of the car and stood on the ground with her in my arms.

"I'm sorry," she winced softly and kissed me on my ear.

"I told you, I, I told you I don't wanna ruin your-" I stuttered. Seth pulled me on her.

"Stop it. Shut up already. Please, just accept my apology." I bit my lip, and the final tears fell alongside hers.