Love at the Nth Time

Compulsive Portrayal

Chapter 5

I stared at her as she clung her arm to mine. It was deafening as the music coming from the bar copied the loud drums and noises. Celine's eyes, full of wonder, scanned the place.

"Hey, hey, hey!" screamed a hipster woman I long knew. Fritz was her name, and greeting her with a closed fist was her and her best friend Deo's gesture of acknowledging, as one of their allies from the sort of us, three that we could fully understand towards the secret compound needed to enjoy the fun at its maximum extent.

"Howdy? Are all the monsters there?" I shouted, leaning closer to her for her to hear me. She shook her head, saying,

"They will eventually. Who's this kid?" I chuckled and whispered,

"This is Celine! Confused." Fritz's black eyes widened with mouth agape. Escaping a disbelieving breath, she exclaimed at Celine, tapping my back with great strength.

"Well, hello, fuddy. You seemed off. Don't worry. We won't bite you! You have to be more scared of this dude!" I rolled my eyes and pushed her away, leaving me with a suspicious look, somewhat it rubbed me in a strange way, inducing me to usher Celine to the bar counter as it was awkward to be around Celine in this kind of bar with me. Unmindful of others' taking glimpses of us, it caught the attention of Pat, who was a long-time waitress I trusted solely about the women I brought into the place. Passing behind me, she murmured,

"Who's she?"

I held Celine's shoulder and leveled her a bit, excusing myself for getting her a light drink. Celine's eyes met mine on the other side of the counter, and I evaded it, conscious Patricia was standing next to me while holding a wooden tray. Leaning my elbows on the counter, the bit of worry upon seeing someone uptight and attentive at the corner of the bar shifted with delight as the admiring giggle of the Japanese bartender came at me, wearing a sexy fitted maid outfit. I smiled at Regina in front of me. I requested,

“Sweetie, Mojito as well, no mix.”

"Oh, Mojito… That's so not you." I nodded, watching Regina sauntering off. Right, I had long passed the tolerance of pure whiskey. Thus, it stated the underlying truth of the predicament I was well familiar with, observing the innocent Celine. Stressing it out with Pat's interrogation,

"You gotta be kidding me. You of all people, you escorted her here?" I eyed Pat.

"F*ck off."

"Well, she's still a hit." Two women with short haircuts, earrings, and tattoos piqued the curiosity of Celine. Laughing casually alongside the hidden intention I possibly was aware of, a quick grip on the glass of the drink, I placed it on the counter in front of Celine, distracting from the comfortable way of game plan the two women had, greeting me with uneasiness, an indifferent smile drew on my lips, I inquired,

"So, what's the topic?"

"We, uh, thought she was lost. I didn't know you were with her," uttered one of them. Celine, clueless, shook her head, opening her mouth to enter a kind of objective stupidly. She acknowledged,

"It's fine. I really felt lost." I looked the other way, hissed, and tilted my head in dismay. The new lady added, "You're beautiful. What's your native?" Their conversation went on smoothly. Then, a sudden arm hung on my shoulder, a genuine smile appeared, knowing it was Deo, the pansexual in the circle. He raised his brow at me and stated,

"Hey bonny, long time no see! Where have you been all this time?" another abrupt act clung onto my arm and pulled me away. I had no idea what her name was, yet I let her drag me as she behaved similarly to how I got into solo moments together.

"Seth!" called Celine, roused me to halt, and gazed at her, asking me not to leave her. Deo pulled her walk towards our way on the usual table in the corner area.

"Seth, let's go! She's old enough!" yelled the woman on my arm, pulling me again. I darted at Deo and the others, having fun with Celine. I warned him,

"Don't harm her! I'll f*cking kill you guys!" Celine wailed, Deo was tugging her cardigan off of her.

"You need to show off your white skin, sister!" Deo announced excitedly and winked at me. I chuckled, at ease, now that Deo was aware I was responsible for Celine's safety.

"But I'm only wearing sleeveless!" exclaimed Celine. The others laughed at her even more as Deo teased her,

"Who cares? Look at those bitches. They're just wearing panties!"

Slugged down the drink, the woman gave it. It tasted a hint of herbal and pine — a martini. "Who's she?" was her question, I answered with a friend's friend. Stating Celine seemed conservative, which was, in fact, obvious, but they noticed the lady kept getting attention. I observed Celine conversing with the people around her, glancing at me every once in a while. Dubious of her tough statement, she rarely encountered these kinds of people. The affirmation of the woman beside me that most guys in this kind of bar desired to meet someone who was a questioning, added Celine's naivety, made her the perfect candidate.

My eyes lowered. The woman kissed me on the neck and came out with her hostility towards a woman opposite her. She asked, "Are you receiving my texts? You're so busy, though you have time to help that girl." I gazed at her; I forgot her name. Faking the smile I wore, her long fingernail glided down my cheek lasciviously.

"I ignored you since you're so annoying. Try to be hard to get. Maybe I'll miss you," I uttered.

"No, I'm not drinking hardcore." My disinterested attention diverted to Celine, firmly stating the words. The two lesbians were sitting next to her, casually touching her, and Celine allowed them. Here I had a second thought of her being alert of people she had just met. The woman on her right side was about to touch her face, and induced me to go to them, and discerned that something was starting to get in the wrong lane.

"You," I firmly said in front of Celine, pushing up my glasses a little as I drew all the eyes of others. Unmindful aside from the two women besides Celine, telling them not to hit on her. Deo whistled. I added, "I need to take you home now. Let's go." Sending me opposition circling the lady and her questioning of why caused them. I eyed Celine. "You stay? I leave," the last cautioned, which did not get through with her. I walked away, headed to my car. Others were calling my name, apathetic, even Celine stopped in front of the auto, smiling at me.

"You let me come here. Are you mad? Did I do something wrong? Those people are so funny. Can I come again?"

"No." My hair waved in the wind's direction, putting the strands at the back of my ear. I hopped in. Celine ran to the other side.

"What's your problem…" she mumbled. Starting the engine, I stated,

"If you wanna come by, go alone. I won't assist you anymore. You said you're not comfortable wearing sleeveless clothes. Still, you showed your skin easily with those two women beside you? How lame." Rapid breaths shallow in dread, I tried to get mad in a way I'd shout it out loud in her face, yet muddled about the emotions I had not regarded just anyone.

"What, I took it off when Fritz insisted on me so much. They're saying it's fine-" the car screeched as I pressed the brakes. I, with a straight-faced. She stopped from getting worked up. Couldn't care less if the vehicles behind us honked their horns, starting the auto again, I stated,

"Because of those sweet words you gave in? I sensed I was digging you to someplace you'd regret coming into. You can meet and greet the community even outside those kinds of bars. I'll help you out." She did not talk. Stopping the auto as the streetlight turned red, Celine fell silent. My eyes lowered, disappointed with how it turned out. Sighing inaudibly, I gently added, "You don't need to overthink it. I'm just trying to protect you. You don't know, and you don't have to know. Having a glimpse of it is enough."

"Did I bother you? I didn't mean to act ignorant. They're saying you're popular in the place, and they're shocked you're with me. If you just let me know something about you-"

"Shut it. You've got nothing to do with what I'm doing. It's not your business," my tone of voice changed in an instant, as if I had been triggered.

I had this feeling I couldn't talk to her calmly anymore, and we ended up not talking till I dropped her off at a condominium building where she'd be staying over with her older sister. My entire indignation was that she acted carelessly, at a loss about how she behaved at the bar, contrary to how I portrayed her. Forcing her away from the place I longed to recognize, and I knew how it made me the 'me' now, unlike her. Strange chaos when I realized how worse I had become at the distance we faced differently—from the way she lived and how I lived mine—a dark hollow within myself, imposing to get out.

I met someone I never wanted to meet. I met someone I always avoided getting closer to; I met someone I hated to know, the main reason for the dislike of getting involved with someone like Celine.