Tainted Loyalty

Chapter Five.

Frida's POV.

The outside air hit my face but it still didn’t clear my mind. I walked fast, still feeling undressed, even though I was fully dressed. It felt so strange. Almost like I could still feel Leonard's touch burning my skin. My breath was borderline erratic, and my heart was pounding louder than my footsteps against the damp earth.

So this was the walk of shame.

My body ached in so many places, reminding me of Leonard, of his hands, his lips, his body against mine. He was such a good lover.

Still I gritted my teeth and walked faster.

This was a mistake. A terrible, reckless mistake. Even if I wanted a rebound, I should’ve kept it out of the family.

Leonard was Mark's uncle. Mark’s uncle of all people! The Alpha of our pack. A man who had no business being in my bed, regardless of whatever he said about us knowing who we wereZz And yet, I had let it happen. Worse even, I had wanted it.

I shook my head, trying to push the memories away. The way his golden eyes had darkened with something desire when I started to take off my dress. Oh, and the way his voice had sent shivers down my spine.

No no no.

This had to end here.

Whatever that night had been, I could never let it happen again.

I finally got to my house and slammed the door behind me, pressing my back against the wood. My body was trembling, but I ignored it.

I looked around, hoping my grandma wasn’t awake. What would I say to her? Even if I lied, I would still feel horrible.

I went in when there was no sign of her around and quickly took off my clothes and started a bath.

I was going to be okay. This was just a lapse in my judgment.

I was stupid, and vulnerable. Deep down I knew that those were nothing more than excuses, but I held on to that.

I would move on. I would forget about the family..

And I would let neither Leonard nor Mark near me ever again.

-

Avoiding Leonard became my new routine. I did it in every way possible. I didn’t attend pack meetings that didn’t have compulsory attendance, didn’t walk along paths when they announced he was going to be passing.

I always kept my head down if we happened to be in the same space with people around, and I ensured that I stayed busy at the pack hospital. The gossip about me had started fading, and that was all I needed.

I was finally regaining control of my life. Unfortunately, my body had other plans.

The first time I felt the illness, I brushed it off. A wave of dizziness when I stood too fast. Nothing unusual. I had been overworking myself. That was all.

Then came the fatigue. No matter how much I slept, I woke up feeling like I had run miles in my sleep.

And the nausea. I must have been reacting to something. Perhaps a new ingredient in the kitchen.

But then I found myself leaning over a bucket in the middle of a shift at the hospital, emptying my stomach until my throat burned, and I started to worry.

"You okay?" One of the nurses, Miriam, asked me.

I forced a smile. "Just a stomach bug or something."

She frowned.

“You sure? You've been looking pale lately."

"I'm fine.” I insisted. "I mean, I’m sick, but I’ll handle it.”

She didn't seem convinced, but I turned away before she could push further.

I didn't have time to be sick. If doctors knew, they’d have me on a bed for something I could treat with a few tablets.

I had work to do.

Days passed, and the exhaustion became worse in spite of my medicines. I could barely get through a shift without feeling like my body was being weighed down by stones.

I ignored it. I was fine. If it was environmental factors, my body would overcome it soon enough.

“Frida!” I turned around to see Miriam.

“Doctor Bernice is asking for the tests results of the…” Miriam’s voice faded out.

I barely had time to hold on to the counter before everything turned upside down. The last thing I heard before darkness swallowed me whole was the sound of someone screaming my name.

-

I woke up to the beeping of machines and the feeling of a bed underneath me. My eyelids felt heavy, my body like lead.

Where was I?

I blinked, trying to focus, and then I saw Miriam, standing by my bedside, arms crossed over her chest.

"You scared the hell out of us."

"What happened?" My throat was dry.

"You collapsed.” She said. “Right in the middle of your shift too."

Oh.

I swallowed hard, my mind sluggishly trying to piece together the last thing I remembered.

"I told you, you've been pushing yourself too hard. You should have taken better care of yourself!” Miriam said, shaking her head. "But you wouldn't listen, huh?”

I tried to sit up, but the pain in my head, forced me back down.

Miriam sighed.

“I ran some tests while you were out."

She sighed, looking away. Something was off about that.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Well congratulations, Frida.” She took a deep breath. "You're pregnant."

“Excuse me?”

Pregnant? No, that couldn't be right.

I shook my head.

"That's not possible. You’re messing with me, aren’t you? It’s not funny."

"I ran the test twice." Miriam's voice was gentle now. "It's real."

I had just one reckless night. Just one night, and now I had a baby growing in me.

And it was Leonard's child.

I felt like I was drowning. The walls of the room started to close in on me, and I couldn’t breathe.

This wasn't supposed to happen. That night was a mistake. It was just a moment of weakness.

“It’s okay, it’s not a bad thing.” Miriam looked like she didn’t know what to say to me.

Couldn’t I get second chances or something?

Why was my entire life was about to change because of one night? And after all the running I had done from him too.

I looked at Miriam, as tears filled my eyes.

“I can’t be pregnant.” I shook my head. She came to sit next to me and started patting my back gently.

This couldn't be happening.