Waking the Wolf

2. St. Xavier’s, Clarksville, Mississippi

2

St. Xavier’s, Clarksville, Mississippi

Four Months earlier

“I CAN’T GO THROUGH WITH THIS,” said the groom, snatching his hands out of Sylvie’s. With a swish of the silver gray tails of his morning coat, David Cole swung away from the altar and his bride-to-be, and strode down the aisle and out of the church, as if fleeing for his life.

Everyone turned to follow him with their eyes. For a moment, there was silence. No one spoke. The congregation turned their heads back as one to stare at Sylvie, standing alone before the pastor. All those faces. All those unspoken questions. All that incredulity.

She couldn’t move. She was cold, so cold, and the shivering started.

Shock, disbelief, abandonment, betrayal. It had to be a nightmare. Any moment now, she should wake up and find all was well, but she didn’t. It was real, and the hubbub began. A whisper here and there to start with, but gradually building as more and more people realized what had happened. The volume grew until Sylvie could take no more. She covered her ears with her shaking hands and cowered down like a frightened child, seeking to withdraw herself from the scene and make it all go away.

The pastor encircled her with his arms to prevent her from falling, while Lisa, her best friend, stepped towards her to support her on the other side. Together, they shepherded her towards the front pew and sat her down, crushing her long ballerina wedding dress.

“What are you doing, Lisa?” Sylvie cried out in alarm. “You’re spoiling my beautiful dress.”

The pastor looked at Lisa over Sylvie’s head and frowned. Lisa nodded in understanding. “We must get her out of here, Reverend. Can we take her out of the vestry door?”

Professor John Templeton, who’d only a few minutes before given Sylvie away to begin a long and happy marriage, overheard Lisa as he helped Sylvie’s mother to the pew. “Take Sylvie out of the church, Lisa, and make sure she gets home safely with her mother,” he said. “I’ll stay here until everyone leaves. I’m sure the pastor needs a helping hand.”

As Sylvie and Lisa walked slowly past the front pew on the way to the vestry door, several of Sylvie’s friends leaned forward and stroked her back as she passed them. Their touch broke through her bewilderment and by the time she and Lisa reached the door, Sylvie was aware enough to hear voices calling out, “We love you, Sylvie,” and “Hang in there, sweetheart.”

Once outside, Lisa folded Sylvie in her arms, and held her tightly as she sobbed her heart out, and asked over and over again, “What did I do wrong? Oh, what did I do wrong, Lisa?”

Lisa soothed her friend, letting her cry through her shock until the wracking sobs eased. She helped Sylvie into the car and drove her back to her mother’s house as fast as was safe. When Lisa opened the front door Sylvie’s dog, Lobo, came bounding out to welcome them home.

Sylvie fell to her knees on the stoop, flung her arms round his neck and clung to him. “Oh, Lobo,” she cried through her tears, “I’m so glad I have you.”

The bewildered dog stood still for a few moments before whining and pulling away. He looked from his mistress to Lisa and back again, trying to understand what was wrong. Lisa took hold of Sylvie’s arm and pulled her to her feet. “Come, let’s get you inside.”

At twenty-one, Sylvie had never lived in her own place. She’d stayed on with her mother while she attended veterinary college in Clarksville, Mississippi. Originally, this had been to keep her mother company because her Canadian French father died when she was eight. As time passed, with tuition fees being hard to find, it made economic sense to stay at home in her mother’s house while she finished out her course.

As Sylvie hobbled into her bedroom, she realized that she’d lost a shoe somewhere along the way, but what did that matter in the scheme of things when she’d lost so much more? And what about all her belongings?

Removal cartons stood stacked all round her room, boxes she and Lisa had packed in happy anticipation of the move from her mother’s house, to the new home she and David would be sharing for the first part of their married life together.

“I must phone him, Lisa.”

Lisa handed Sylvie her cell phone and Sylvie made the call.

“He’s not answering,” said Sylvie.

“Of course, he isn’t,” replied Lisa. “And I don’t suppose he will. You’ll need to leave him a text. If he wants to get back to you, he will.”

Sylvie sent the text and tossed the phone onto her pillow.

“Lisa,” she began as she sat down on the edge of the bed, giving no further thought to her wedding dress. “How am I going to cope with all this?”

“We’ll get through it together, Sylvie. I’ll be with you all the way.”

“But I’ll have to unpack everything. I’ll be unpacking my dreams.”

“I’ll help you. They’re only boxes, and they can wait a few days.”

“Oh, Lisa, it wouldn’t be so bad if I understood why David behaved like that. Why he changed his mind.”

There was a tap on the door. “May I come in?” asked Sylvie’s mother as she entered the room. “I heard what you were saying, chérie.”

Yvonne moved across the room and crouched down on her heels in front of her daughter. Drawing Sylvie’s hands into her own, she said gently, “It’s nothing to do with you. You didn’t do anything wrong. These things happen. People change. David experienced a paradigm shift in his feelings.”

“But I didn’t get any warning, Maman. He hasn’t been any different to me. Someone or something must have made him act like that?” Sylvie pleaded.

“My darling, I don’t want you to hold out false hope. From the look I saw on his face, I would say the decision was personal and permanent.”

Sylvie started to weep again, “David’s broken my heart. How am I going to get over this?”

Lisa pulled Sylvie closer and gave her a reassuring hug. “We’ll do it together, won’t we, Mrs Latour?”

Yvonne straightened up, pulled across a stool and sat down. “My darling, we’ll get through the next few days, one day at a time. In six months’ time, you will look back to today and wonder why you ever felt so bad. You don’t believe me because you’re young and you’re hurting so much but, trust me, this will pass.”

Sylvie sniffed. “Maman, I love you so much,” she said, wiping her nose with the back of her hand.

“Sylvie, you’ve lost the person you loved the most in the world. You need to acknowledge that. It would be good for you to spend the next few days grieving. For you it’s possibly even worse than if David had died because you don’t have the comfort of knowing that he loved you. So don’t try to shake it all off. Let yourself experience the pain, and you will heal faster.”

“What should she do, Mrs Latour?” asked Lisa.

“I suggest Sylvie gets through the next few days in the best way she can. If she wants to sit in front of the television all day eating ice cream that’s fine. If she wants to stay in bed with the pillow over her head, that’s fine, too. Anything that gives her heart and body a chance to heal.”

“Are you sure, Maman? You’re not telling me to pull myself together and be brave?”

“Chérie, give yourself permission to mourn for a few days.”

“Mrs Latour, you’re so wise. Sylvie’s lucky you’re her mother.”

Sylvie smiled, a weak smile, but a smile nonetheless.

“Did you see that, Mrs Latour? Sylvie’s smiling.”

Sylvie’s smile broadened. “You’re right, Lisa. It’s really good to have a mother who is a student councilor even if she is a bit bossy at times.”

“Right, first things first. A good hot shower, a glass of champagne to lift the spirits… and after that, what would you like to do, Sylvie?” asked her mother.

“I’ll go downstairs and be with you both. I don’t really want to be on my own at the moment.”

Yvonne rose to her feet and kissed Sylvie on the top of her head. “Fine, I’ll leave you two to it.”

As soon as the door had closed behind her mother, Sylvie turned to Lisa.

“Lisa, everything my mother said is sensible, but I need an explanation from David. I want his reasons for why he did what he did. He owes me that, at least.”

“Sylvie, he probably doesn’t know himself. And, anyway, you would probably find any reason he gives you hurtful. Why would you want to run that risk?”

“I’m not sure that I can’t win him back.”

“Oh, Sylvie!”

“Well, he’s not involved with anyone else, is he? There’s not something you’re keeping from me?”

“Not that I’m aware of, but he has canceled a couple of dates with you recently, hasn’t he?”

Sylvie looked up in denial. “But there was a good reason for that. He had to take his younger brother to sports practice.”

Lisa shrugged, “So he said.”

“You’ve never really liked David, have you, Lisa?”

“Can’t say I have. I’ve always thought he had a chip on his shoulder,” answered Lisa.

Sylvie considered for a few moments then she surprised Lisa, “I haven’t been honest with myself. He has been a little withdrawn with me recently. I put it down to wedding nerves and tried to ignore it.”

Lisa looked at her friend as if this was not news to her, “When did he start to behave differently?”

“I can’t be sure but it was when we received our degree results. We’ve been neck and neck ever since we were at high school together, and that continued into vet school. It was always a friendly rivalry and didn’t affect our relationship. But… yes, he did change when our results were published.”

“But you both received your Bachelor of Veterinary Science with the same grade of degree.”

“Yes, we did, but we’d both applied for a place on the post-graduate course and I was given a place, and David wasn’t.”

“You’re not telling me that after being together all these years, he suddenly got an attack of green-eyed machismo?”

“It’s the only reason I can find. Maybe he was always that way but, as long as I didn’t pull ahead, he was able to deal with my success.”

“Even if you’re right, do you want to spend the rest of your life with someone so petty?”

“Lisa, I love him. That sounds pathetic in view of what has happened, but I can’t switch off my love in a second.”

Lisa stared at her friend in disbelief and remained silent.

Sylvie added, “I must see him again. Just once. I want to ask him why he didn’t want to marry me anymore. And I need some explanation for the cruel way in which he let me find out.”

“What if he continues to leave your calls unanswered?”

“Lisa, please, would you go and see him and ask him to meet with me one last time? Tell him we’ll meet somewhere public if he wants.”

“If you’re really sure that you want to do this, I’ll see what I can do. Meanwhile, you should take off that dress.”

Lisa unzipped Sylvie’s wedding dress, symbol of the new life her friend had planned to start as David’s wife, and helped her pull it up over her shoulders. She opened up one of Sylvie’s bags, found a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, and threw them at her, telling her to hop into the shower and turn it on hot.

By the end of the week, Sylvie was more in control of her emotions. She could hear David’s name mentioned, or their favorite tune played without bursting into tears, but she was still caught unawares from time to time as a passing memory brought the tears welling up.

David did not return Sylvie’s calls nor reply to her texts. She decided that to pursue him any further by phone weakened her standing with him. She was waiting for Lisa to succeed in making a connection and arrange a meeting between the two of them.

Lisa was as good as her word and worked with Sylvie to re-establish order in her bedroom. Lobo was a great comfort, too. He followed Sylvie from room to room and slept at the foot of her bed. Whenever she woke up in the dark troubled by her anguish, she leaned down and stroked Lobo’s head. He wagged his tail and inched ever closer to her. Yvonne who had strict rules about dogs not being allowed on the bed, looked the other way. Sylvie needed the big dog’s undemanding affection.

Sylvie’s godfather and mentor, Professor Templeton, paid several visits. He was a bluff, kindly man who took his responsibility as godfather seriously. Yvonne was fond of him as he’d been her husband’s best friend and colleague, both of them being professors at the Veterinary College. He was now the Dean, but he was a down to earth man for all that, and spent the week helping Yvonne send back all the wedding presents and settle the bills for the wedding reception.

Sylvie was still anxious. She wouldn’t be able to move forward with her life until she’d resolved things to her satisfaction with David. If he wouldn’t rekindle their relationship, he should at least give her some reason for his actions.

Lisa was coming to supper, as it was her night off from her job as a waitress in one of the local cafés, The Wanderer. She’d recently gained her joint honors bachelor’s degree in archeology and anthropology and was continuing on to a PhD in Anthropology. As her parents were not wealthy and were already funding her younger brother’s college education, she worked part-time to pay for her fees.

Sylvie was making Lisa’s favorite, Chicken Creole, with rice and beans. It was good to be doing something creative to give pleasure to her friend, a way of thanking Lisa for her support. Sylvie admitted to herself that she was playing games with fate. If she did this, that would happen. If she made a wonderful supper for Lisa, Lisa would bring the news that she’d arranged a rendezvous with David. Such wishful thinking!

As she was putting the dish in the oven to heat through, Lobo began his welcoming bark and rushed to the front door. Sylvie closed the oven and hurried after him.

“Hi, Sylvie! I’ve got some good news for you,” said Lisa stepping over the threshold.

“Hold on a moment, Lisa. Let me get Lobo back before he gets run over,” said Sylvie over her shoulder, as she rushed outside to catch up with her boisterous dog.

Grabbing hold of his collar, she hauled him back into the house, and shut the door before turning to look at Lisa.

“Yes?” she asked anxiously. “You’ve managed it?”

Lisa nodded in confirmation. “Sunday, 1 p.m. David insisted on a daylight meeting. I suggested The Wanderer. I’m working an extra shift so I’ll be able to keep an eye on you both in case things don’t work out as well as you hope.”

“Oh, Lisa, you’re a marvel and the most wonderful of friends,” said Sylvie, giving her friend a hug. “Come, take off your coat and let’s go eat.”