Le Desespoir: The Cursed Paradise

Be With You Always

For a moment, I saw worry on her face again. She was probably thinking that it was her fault that I was abandoning my aspiration. After all, she always had such a weak constitution and had spent a lot of time on the sickbed. She was correct that it was indeed for her. But if I had to choose between my dreams and my life, I would always choose my life— and she was my love and my life. She had seeped into my skin so deep that we had become one.

I needed to make her understand that my wish to become a healer was for me too. I was not giving up on anything. In fact, I was being greedy. I always wanted her to stay by my side. I wanted to become a doctor to ensure she would remain with me for as long as we could be together. God knew I wouldn't know what to do if I lost him. No, I knew I would die if I were to lose her.

"Don't give me that look mon amour," I cajoled as I showered her face with butterfly kisses.

With a naughty smile on her face, my lover returned the small kisses I had showered upon her until our lips met and joined in a deep kiss. Our tongues entwined as our hands explored each other's bodies. I could feel myself getting hard as she cupped my manhood which was beginning to hurt beneath my breeches.

We were both panting when we finally broke the kiss. We stared at each other's eyes, her orbs reflecting the burning desire I had in mine. Slowly, gently, I pushed her down on the grass and had her lie there beneath me as I cupped her face.

"Han…" she whispered huskily and I smiled.

In a little while, I knew we would both be naked, consuming our passion in this heavenly place. But for me, it wasn't the land which I considered heaven. For me, “le paradis” existed with her in my arms and I pray it would stay this way forever.

"Je t'aime. Je veux être avec toi pour toujours …" I love you. I wanted to be with you always…

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He rolled over from his position and hit his head hard against the foot of the chair.

"Oof," he groaned as he drowsily scratched the injured part of his head and slowly opened his eyes. The unfamiliar sight before him jerked him from his sleepy state.

"Huh?" He inhaled sharply as he looked at his surroundings. "Where— "

He was about to ask nobody as he noted the chair where he hit his head, the huge oak table behind the chair, and the shelves and shelves of books around him.

He panicked as he tried to remember where he was when he felt movement on his right side. Turning sharply towards that direction, he saw the still sleeping Jerome turning inside the sleeping bag as he scratched his face.

"Oh," he murmured as he began to relax.

He now remembered that he and his brother were now in France, in Le Désespoir, in the house that they inherited. Yesterday, when they arrived, they had a hard time looking for rooms since the place was just too big— not to mention that the plumbing in each room was ancient.

After walking and walking inside the house for hours, the two of them got so tired and decided to settle in the study room or office, which was just on the first floor. It was the first door on the right side from the front door. It was also surprisingly the only room with a quite up to date adjacent bathroom which they were both thankful about.

In the end, even though there were huge couches in the room, the two of them slept on the floor using the sleeping bags they had bought back in town. As for their food, judging from the distance of the kitchen to the study— not to mention that the kitchen was as ancient as the house itself, Austin reckoned they would be using the portable stove they bought too to cook their meals.

For him, it wasn't a problem because he was used to poverty. Since his mother had to work, he was the one who kept house when he was a kid so he knew how to cook, do the dishes, clean the house, and do the laundry.

He frowned as he looked at his older brother who seemed uncomfortable sleeping on the floor even with a sleeping bag. Although his brother seemed game to whatever happened during their stay, Austin worried about him. He knew his brother wasn't used to this kind of setup since he grew up with the only chore of ordering people around.

With a sigh, he stretched his arms. He would be taking over meals, he decided as he glanced at the window and stopped. His mouth slightly opened at the explosion of colors of the sky outside. Living in the city, he had never seen such a magnificent view of the sunrise. The mixture of blue, white, yellow, orange and violet beyond the glass reminded Austin of… her.

"Huh?" Startled at the direction of his thoughts, he shook his head. "What am I thinking about?" he asked himself as he stood up.

He didn't know where the thought came from nor was he sure who exactly he was talking about.

"Whatever," he muttered as he pulled at his sleeping bag only to pause as he realized one painful thing.

Geez, he couldn't believe himself as he eyed his erect manhood which was bulging underneath his pajamas.

"Aish," he muttered again as he marched towards the bathroom, clutching at his thing, ready to relieve himself of his morning wood.

An hour after, Austin had showered and dressed, and was already setting up their meal on top of the oak table inside the study room. He woke up really early so he didn't disturb his brother.