The Rebel

Amina-4

As I had suspected, Rashid was a bit reluctant, just to be decent, but finally gave in. I’m not proud of myself for using his tender feelings for me, but I will add it to the list of things I should feel ashamed of.

After the finishing touches on my look, imitating a manly walk, I step out of the wardrobe, and with my hands on my hips, I step up to Rashid, like some cowboy. Poor boy almost drops dead when he sees me as a “man”, and I can’t really decide if its amazement, disgust, or a mixture of both that is displayed on his face. They both stare silently, Rashid is scratching the back of his neck, Selina is chewing on her nails. What now? Is my disguise so good or so bad?

“Let’s say we didn’t know each other. How old would you say I am?”

Selina scratches her forehead, stands up, walks around me attentively, then stops in front of me.

“It’s really not that bad. I don’t think you look older than eighteen. A really cute eighteen-year-old boy, right, Rashid?” she turns to her brother for support.

Rashid mumbles something under his nose, then as Selina pushes his shoulder, he speaks up at last.

“I prefer Amina as a woman. Much more,” he says grumpily.

We both howl at his remark, and he blushes. After I have looked in the mirror and made sure everything is in place, and that I can’t possibly be manlier, even if I try, I turn around and talk to them in a much more sober tone.

“Okay, let’s go through the plan one more time, from beginning to end,” I say, walking up and down excitedly. “The race starts after five in the evening. This is good from the aspect that I won’t overheat in these clothes with the high temperature. I will tell my family I’m going shopping with Selina and Rashid will accompany us. They will consent to it, because dad keeps nagging me anyway that I should go on a spree before my wedding.

“But what about the driver?” Selina asks with concern. “For sure your father will insist that his own driver take us.”

“Damn it. That’s true,” I say, chewing on my lip, because I haven’t thought about that before. “I can’t really ask Omar, dressed as a man, to take me to the racing tracks. It would look more than strange.”

For a few seconds we all are absorbed in our thoughts, panic is coming over me that my well-elaborated plan is doomed to fail. There must be a solution! – I keep telling myself, but my brain has frozen, faced by this unexpected issue. Just then, thank heaven, Rashid speaks up.

“We really can’t go around the driver, but that’s not the end yet. We can get ourselves dropped off at RAK Centre, you tell him you’ll be quite long in there and he should wait for us at the parking lot, or he should come back for us in the evening.

“At RAK?”

“That’s the nearest to Sharjah. The tracks are only a few minutes’ drive from there. Tomorrow I will take my car to the parking lot, and I’ll get myself dropped home. No one will notice if we leave the shopping mall.”

“He’s right,” Selina jumps up with thrill. “We’ll take the thobe and the rest with us, and you’ll get changed in the toilet. And then, when we have come back, you’ll put your own clothes back on, and you’ll come home in them.”

A huge smile spreads on my face, Selina and I hug, and begin to jump around in circles, screaming, like two kids. I have genius friends, and I feel throwing my arms around Rashid’s neck to thank him, but control myself in the last moment. Physical interaction between a man and a woman, unless they are family members, is a rather delicate business, so I just express my gratitude in words for his idea after I catch my breath after our spontaneous joy dance.

“That’s exactly how we will do it. I’ll tell Omar when to come for us, while we go over to the tracks through RAK in Rashid’s car,” I summarize the plan with excitement.

“Heaven forbid your mother would want to come with us,” Selina pulls her face.

“I’ll only tell her in the last minute that we are going. She hates not having enough time to prepare herself, and anyhow, she usually goes to Al-Noor. I don’t think there will be a problem with that.”

“What about Rafa?”

“I simply won’t tell her we’re going out,” I shrug my shoulders.

It’s evening by the time I leave Selina’s house and head home. It’s strange to keep a secret from the family, it feels like a lump in my throat. Plus, with my bad luck, tonight even Kareem has come over with his wife, which is kind of rare. Not that Iman’s presence makes a lot of difference, she mostly just focusses on her plate, and only speaks when asked. She is eighteen, and unfortunately, she is exactly the kind of girl I can imagine as Kareem’s wife. Silent, obedient and humble. I’m not sure her character is really like this, or whether it has been her marriage with Kareem I do suspect my brother very consciously chose a humble wife. Although I know nothing about their private life, I still feel sorry for Iman.

Mostly the men are talking, I can feel my father trying to ease the tension, and my mother also tries to say something at times, but the atmosphere is just not the same as it was a few weeks ago. The wedding, and this whole crap regarding my real mother is hovering over us like a grey cloud. I do my best to act natural, but the more I try, the less I succeed. I’m shivering, I can hardly get the food down, because I’m aware that this is no longer a game. If I get caught tomorrow, I’ll be in big trouble, and what’s worst about the whole issue is that it’s not only my own safety at stake but my friends’ too. Rashid would probably not be in too much trouble. His father would tell him off, perhaps he’d take the car for a while, or something like that, but Selina is a different story. She would be severely punished if it was found out she helped me, and that is like a ton’s weight on my heart.

Chapter 5