Inwardly, I shrieked loudly, hoping this was all just a horrible nightmare, but knowing I wasn't going to wake up because I already was. I sobbed softly. Why does this always happen to me? Well, it just happened for the first time, but still! And yes, I was aware that I was sounding like a little spoiled kid right now. A thousand thoughts were racing through my head. I pictured hundreds of ways this could turn out in just a few seconds of silence. My brain spun thoughts like thin threads that could be broken by a single action. I wondered how Wilhelmine or Tom would react if I never came home. What my mother was thinking at the moment and if she was looking down at me from a cloud. Whether the men's gun, or Kira's, was actually loaded. All of this shot through my little head in a matter of
