The Wolf in Sheep's Skin

Chapter 44

“Good. I know it sucks, but it’s for the best.” My mom let out a long sigh and smiled in relief. “I’ll talk to Quinn about it later, once she’s calmed down.”

I nodded and sighed, pursing my lips.

“I’ll go work on that dress.” I went to go towards the stairs, up to my room. But my mom reached out for me, pressing her lips together. I froze, and her face fell.

“They’re coming home tomorrow.” She whispered, like the mentioning of them was tainted. I sucked in a breath and nodded.

“Okay.” I’m not apologizing or removing my command. Bridget got what she deserved.

“I… I’ve always tried to make your siblings’ mates feel welcome. Like they belong. I don’t know what I did wrong.” Her voice drifted off and her eyes glazed over, staring past me.

I tensed, and my heart clenched. She’s not mad at me?

“You do mom. Everyone else’s mate felt welcome.” I gave her a smile, thinking of my other siblings and their mates who hadn’t moved with us. The big events we had, with all the siblings and cousins.

“You heard what she said. About the house being too full, too loud. She doesn’t feel like she’s part of the family.” She shook her head, frowning.

I pursed my lips and cursed Bridget for the hundredth time. She’s not even here and she’s upsetting people.

“No one else’s mate has had a problem. You involve her in everything. She’s part of all our holidays, you watch Henry and Ava for her, and you even let them her pick the room she wanted in the house. You’ve done more than I could ever list, mom. It isn’t you.” I gave her a soft smile and pulled her into a tight hug.

Warmth spread through me as she wrapped her arms around me. She sighed, leaning her head on my shoulder.

“I know, I just hate it… I wish there was more I could do.” Her voice was muffled against my shoulder.

“I don’t think there’s more you could do. It didn’t sound like she didn’t feel like part of the family. She doesn’t feel like a leader of the family.” I scowled, my skin itching at the thought of that night.

“I heard that too. But I don’t know how she’d get the idea she should be in charge. She isn’t above me or your father in the pack.” She shrugged, pulling away from me. She looked off in the distance, deep in thought.

I pursed my lips and huffed.

“She mentioned Olivia a lot that night. She’s whispering lies in her ear.” To get to me. They’d been talking about me. I groaned, grinding my teeth together.

Why does this always happen? Some wolf finds out I’m dominant, and they try to ruin everything.

“Maybe Erik is talking to her about it while they’re away. We’ll have to see how things are when they get back.” She squeezed my arm, giving me a reassuring smile.

“Alright.” My stomach churned at the unknown. What if she’s still mad when they get back? Will Erik be upset? Ask me to take off the command?

“I’m not taking off the command, even if Erik asks. Bridget went against the family.” I held my head up high, puffing out my chest.

“Of course not!” She recoiled. “She knows about your wolf; she can’t be allowed to talk to Olivia about it. Or anyone else for that matter. I hate to say it, but if she’s truly conspiring with Olivia, she’s forcing herself out of the family.” She scowled, her lips pressing together.

“I’m just glad to hear you’re not mad at me.” I sighed, deflating.

She smiled, and cusped my cheeks, forcing me to look her in the eye.

“You’re taking care of us. Protecting us, just like you always have.” Her eyes lit up and she squeezed my face. I sighed out my nose and smiled. “Your methods can be a bit extreme, but you get the job done. Thank you.” She winked, patting me on the cheek and dropping her hands.

My throat closed up, and tears threatened to escape. The past few days weighed on me, making the pit in my stomach grow. I chewed my bottom lip and rubbed my hands on my pants.

I stared into her blue eyes and sucked in a deep breath. But the air was dry, plain. Missing her comforting scent.

“Are you alright, dear?” She tilted her head, giving me a worried look.

I wanted to tell her everything. About my awful day. The flowers, the cookies, the note and ribbon burning a hole in pocket. My heart rate picked up, and my stomach twisted into knots. The idea of speaking about him, telling her about his gifts, made my heart ache. What would I say?

That I can’t have him? That it’s too risky? She can’t do anything about it. It’ll only make her more stressed; she already has so much to worry about.

“I’m fine. It’s just been… a lot since moving in.” I sighed and wiped my wet eyes, making sure no tears fell.

“I know, dear. The first few months in the pack are always the most stressful. Things will settle soon.” She gave me a sober smile and rubbed my arm.

But her words didn’t heal the stabbing pain in my chest. Why did that c*nt have to ruin everything?

If I had a regular wolf, things wouldn’t be like this. I could do what I want. Be carefree, not always have to think things through. Olivia wouldn’t have such a problem with me.

I could try and be with Jay.

My heart tightened, and pain shot through me. Sharp and piercing, my vision went in and out. I sucked in a harsh breath, blinking. I froze, blinking as my vision returned to normal.

My mom was in front of me, watching me with her face twisted in confusion.

“I uh... I’m just tired. I’m going to go work on Quinn’s gown.” I pressed on a smile and hurried towards the stairs before she could stop me. I raced up the stairs to my room, clicking the door behind me.

Leaning my back against the door I squeezed my eyes shut. Pain radiated from my stomach, coursing through me. My hands went numb, and I squeezed my jaw tight.

I pressed myself against the door and waves of pain went over my skin. Sharp, jolting tingles jabbed into me, like someone was sticking me with thousands of little needles.

What the f*ck! I wanted to cry out, to whimper in pain. But I choked it down.

My skin itched and crawled and my bones craved to crack. I sucked in a breath, and Lilith clawed to get out.

Stop it! I’m not shifting!

I squeezed my hands together, forcing Lilith into her dark hole.

I’m done letting you ruin things!

I sank to the floor, my heart pounding in my chest. It was deafening with each beat making my whole-body shake. Everything in me told me to run, to flee, go somewhere safe.

Stay calm, Gwen. You can do this. You’re in control.

I let out deep, slow breaths.

After a moment, my heart slowed, and the pain ebbed. The harsh tingling only remained in my fingertips, like I’d sat on my hands for too long.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head against my door. My body was cold, covered in a thin layer of sweat.

I’m alright. Everything’s fine, I’m safe. I’m in control, she didn’t get out. You’re in control. But goosebumps were raised all over my body. Like something was wrong. Like I needed to escape.

Suck it up, Gwen. You’ve gone through worse. It’s just a man and some awful woman.

I huffed, and jumped up off the floor, and glared at my closed closet doors.

I can’t do what I want about either of them. Or arrange for Quinn’s ceremony to be at home. But I can make sure she has the best d*mn dress possible.

I swung open my closet doors and grabbed Quinn’s gown out of it’s garment bag. Sinking into my desk chair, I began working, steadily threading gems onto a needle. The champagne gems glimmered in the light.

The odd sense to run remained, but I forced myself to sit and work. Even as Quinn and our mom talked, I pushed through it. Working, staring at the gown, keeping my hands steady. Soon the house stilled, and the only sound was soft sleeping breaths and the quiet slip of thread through fabric.

I shoved everything else out of my mind, but it could only be sustained for so long. The night went on, and my eyes drooped. My fingers ached holding the needle, and I almost pricked the wrong section.

I sighed and sat up, stretching my tense muscles. My back tightened, and I eyed my bed. I have to work in the morning. We have all those customers, I can’t be exhausted and unable to work. I finished up my work and slipped Quinn’s gown back into the garment bag in my closet.

Standing in front of the closet, I froze, thinking of the note and ribbon in my pocket. I’d avoided thinking about them since I’d come in my room.

But my hand itched, tingly, ready to grasp it. I hadn’t touched them since I’d put them in there. Like they’d bite me.

Or send me into the woods looking for him.

I chewed my bottom lip, rubbing my fingers together. Just take them out and throw them away. You can’t have them. I tensed every muscle in my body, glaring at myself in a mirror.

It’s just paper and some ribbon! You can do it!

I shoved my hand in my pocket, grabbing them out. My heart raced as I looked at the little trash can by my desk. Put it in the trash. Do it.

But my body wouldn’t do it.

I growled at myself and stomped a foot. What the h*ll is wrong with me! I can’t have him! I can’t keep these! Keeping them in my hand, I changed into a loose nightgown. My bed creaked as I flopped down, sitting on the edge.

I glared at the paper, thinking of his Fae gift. Does he have some kind of magic over me? I shook my head and groaned. No. That’s st*pid. It’s just him and his st*pid charms and smug smile.

Just thinking of him, leaning against the back of his truck when I’d taken back my apron made my stomach flutter. His smug smile and droopy eyes. The way he always looked pleased with himself when he teased me.

I opened up the note, reading it over and over again. The pit in my stomach gnawed at me, and I deflated, flopping back onto my bed.

Holding the note above me in the air, I traced my thumb over his writing. It wouldn’t hurt to keep it, would it?

No one would know. I’ll keep it to myself. I smiled to myself, the pain my gut going away. It’ll be my secret. Just a little comfort until things have passed, and I’m over it.

The ribbon was silky soft between my fingers. I held them to my nose, taking a deep breath. His scent lingered on them, barely. Soft summer rain. Fresh earth and grass.

Trees swayed above me, swishing in the wind.

Warmth kissed my skin from the sun.

My heart calmed and the pain in my gut washed away.

Grass caressed my skin, wind singing softly in my ears, drifting me into sleep.