The Wolf in Sheep's Skin

Chapter 37

I pulled away, and my heart stuck in my throat. His eyes were wide, with his lips parted. My stomach twisted into knots. He glanced down at my lips and his eyes had specks of copper. He leaned in, kissing me.

His lips were pillowy, yet rough and filled with need. I closed my eyes and shivered. His breath was warm against my cheek, his stubble tickling me. White hot sparks went through me, down my spine, making my toes curl. I ran my hand through his hair, pulling it. He growled and his kiss grew desperate. He tasted like oranges; sweet, bursting citrus.

My breath was ragged, and I ached to feel his touch, everywhere, anywhere.

My heart raced as he trailed kisses up my jawline to my ear. He nipped my earlobe, making me gasp. Shivers went down my spine to my core. He growled and his hand tightened on my cheek, cupping the back of my head.

He planted kisses down my neck. My heart pounded against my chest, and my eyes fluttered with each brush of his lips. He nipped at the crook of my neck. I gasped and pressed myself into him.

My head turned hazy. Lilith swirled in the back of my mind. Eager. Waiting.

I tensed and flung my eyes open. I pried myself away and jumped to my feet, stumbling back.

Time slowed as I looked into his eyes. Every time we’d been together, every time I’d lost control, flashed before my eyes.

She didn’t attack Bridget when she talked about burning the shop. It was him. I was fine till she talked about him.

He’s making me lose control.

I shook and my breath was ragged. His copper eyes kept me pinned to the ground. My body went cold, like I’d been plunged into the river.

Dread pooled in my stomach. Icy tendrils crawled up my spine, and I gasped for breath, shaking.

His eyes swirled with pain, and he sucked in a sharp breath. His jaw clenched, and he squeezed his eyes shut. I stepped back, swiveling my head around, no longer under his hold. Panic bubbled in my chest, threatening to spew out of my mouth. The river was too fast and wide for me to swim across.

“Behind the waterfall. There’s a pathway. The grounds slick.” His voice was thick, his face was scrunched up.

I sprinted away towards the waterfall. There was a narrow path of slick rocks. My heart pounded in my chest as I raced home.

Trees flew past me as my feet pounded against the forest floor. The world spun around me, and I stumbled as I ran, trying to catch my footing.

“Go back!” Lilith screamed.

Go away! My throat burned as I gasped for air. My legs ached as I sprinted home.

Her rage coursed through me, burning through my veins. I tripped, smacking against the ground. The wind left my lungs, and I gasped for breath.

“Go to him!” She screamed and my vision went in and out. My lungs ached as I struggled to breath. “You’re ruining everything!” Her scream made my head pound, like it would explode.

I sucked in a deep breath as spots formed in my vision.

“No!” I screamed at myself. Everything went dark, and the earth fell away from beneath me.

Memories played through my head. How I always managed to lose control with him. How good he smelled, like summer rain. I closed my eyes and could smell him on me. Sweet orange lingered on my lips.

“I can’t.” I whispered. I took ragged breaths and laid on the ground, limp. The grass caressed my skin.

My heart pounded and my stomach fluttered. I thought of every time we’d interacted. How no matter what he said, no matter how angry he mad me, I couldn’t seem to stay away.

“Go back to him.” Lilith whispered. Her voice was soft, like she was comforting a child.

I wanted to leap to my feet. To race to him. To see his comforting face, to hear how soft his voice had been. But I couldn’t.

Tears welled behind my eyes and pain tore at my heart.

“I lose control around him. I can’t.” I whispered. My bottom lip quivered, and the tears threatened to escape.

“If you won’t go back, I’ll make you.” Lilith snarled. Rage flashed in my chest as she struggled for control, digging at the corners of my mind. I pushed against her, and a whine left me.

I shook with effort, panting, fighting against her.

“Don’t you get it?” I snarled, shaking with effort of struggling against her. “He handles problems! You shift and hurt people. You tried to k*ll Bridget, you rampage, you k*ll everything in your path! You’re a problem!” I screamed, making my throat burn.

My body contorted and I rolled over, on my hands and knees. My muscles ripped and tore, and I dug my fingers into the dirt. She fought to shift and my mind blanked, going in and out. Snarls and growls left my throat as I struggled against her.

“He not hurt us!” Lilith growled, and pain shot through me, like jolts of electricity frying my nerves. I gasped for breath, digging at the ground.

Darkness ebbed at the corner of my mind, and my body went cold. She struggled, winning, taking over.

Images of him realizing my wolf was out of control came to mind. Of him having to control her, fight her, handle her. Just like he did with the other ‘bad’ wolves. My heart ached at the thought, like it had been ripped from my chest and squeezed.

“You can’t put him through that!” I dug into the inner depths of my mind. I balled up my fists, tensed every muscle in my body, and shoved her deep into a corner of my mind.

My arms were underneath me, limp and numb, unable to move.

I gasped for air. My mind was silent. The sound of rushing water filled my ears. A breeze blew against my sweat covered skin. I shivered and sucked in a deep breath through my nose.

“I won’t let you hurt him.” I whispered to myself. Birds sang in the trees above me. My insides were numb.

Hollow.

I stood and stumbled home.