The night of the fallen

Elize's awakening

''Dear parents, you are not to blame for what happens in my mind and in my body, I alone can't stand living with the emptiness in which I live and every time I feel that the darkness of this emptiness consumes me more and more . "I don't want to be a ghost or a spectator of my own life, I'm sorry, you were the best father I've ever had."

Little Elize wrote that letter and let it rest on the table, after taking all the sleeping pills possible, all that she needed. What was in the letter was true. I had been an only child and my parents had only given me what they could and more, but something was wrong in my brain, we knew it when I started having anxiety and panic attacks in high school, then I went to the doctor who referred them to a psychiatrist. . and explained that the wiring of his brain needed pills, that he needed anxiolytics, antidepressants and a lot of other s**t. He was very young when he started, then he got fed up, he no longer wanted to be taking a pharmacy to feel good. I was fed up. So that was his reality, Elize's. Now I was 16 years old and about to finish high school, but I had no idea what I would study, and I didn't want to think about it.

He took 180 pills, his parents were working all that morning, so everything indicated that he would be fine, he said he didn't have school, although he lied to them. Yes I had, I just wanted to be alone at home. So everything starts to make you sleepy, things start to look grainy, you start to feel clumsy moving around the room and you smile, this was your dream, to leave feeling this way. She wanted to dance, but she couldn't, she was too high to do it and everything meant an effort, suddenly all the furniture was huge, an obstacle and the room was much smaller than she remembered, so she stopped trying to move and started to relax. . , lay back on the bed and breathed a sigh of relief. Tomorrow it wouldn't be there. I wouldn't face anything else. Honestly, she no longer cared if there was a heaven or a hell, if there was, she believed she would go to hell, so nothing very nice would be in store for her, so it was better not to think about it. And then, he started yawning. This indicated the end, he would sleep and never wake up again. The final stage.

She didn't know if it had been a dream or she was very drugged, but before she closed her eyes completely, she saw the silhouette of someone there. A boy, with orange hair, had read that people who had hair that color meant bad luck, or at least they were bullied for it. So his mind intercepted that that meant goodbye.

But he didn't do it.

He woke up. In a f*****g hospital bed.

-Because? —he tried to stammer.

The reality is that he didn't say it that way, or at least it didn't sound that way. I don't know if you heard a person talk who had an overdose trying to modulate afterwards, they never say anything coherent.

The nurse who was nearby looked at her.

—So you woke up, that's good. Welcome to life again.

She sees her parents talking to a doctor in the distance, and her parents see her in the distance, happy to see her alive. She was intubated up to her stomach, so she assumed they had pumped her stomach, her mouth felt numb on the side of the tube and she was very thirsty. But these things happen when you want to die and things don't go as planned, right? So he wondered, looking at the ceiling of the hospital, if perhaps after this he wouldn't be able to speak, if he would be half an i***t or if he already was and hadn't realized, he knew that an overdose, in addition to causing your death, could also cause other things. The problem is that he had precisely done everything necessary for me to die and not have to go through this.

Summarizing this part because it is not entertaining, several days in the hospital when you are stupid and cannot carry out death. I read somewhere that the percentage of people who successfully exterminated their lives with pills was very tiny. Normally there is someone who saves you, you don't take enough pills or you become an i***t. In Elize's case, she didn't know which one it was, but she was lucky not to be an i***t. According to what she told her parents, she had vomited a huge amount of pills and that meant that her body didn't receive as much damage as the first ones she had. They did melt with the stomach acid. Her parents called it a miracle, because neither of them were there and she hadn't stuck her fingers in to vomit, she remembers closing her eyes. But she assumed her body expelled itself anyway and she didn't remember it because she was drugged. Anyway, it didn't matter, he would spend three months trying to get back to what he was before, so he escaped one afternoon.

She remembers running so quickly from her house and going into places they would never imagine she would go, so they wouldn't find her quickly. But the truth is that he was still not well, but he finds the shore of the river that was close to his house and the neighborhood and on the single railing he staggers and falls into the water. He smiled to himself, great, he would leave again. She could barely move on her own, she wouldn't even have instincts to save herself, she thought, because if she wanted to she couldn't because she didn't even know how to swim. Although something holds her body and lifts her up. His eyes were misty-eyed and he was babbling.

Her brain was working to at least realize that this was the work of a person, because she was being carried in the arms of someone who left her on the ground trying to give her first aid.

Who the hell is he? And there while water escapes, the young man finally sees. Matyas, the most popular boy in school. Elize wanted the earth itself to swallow her and not spit her out again. Now he has officially become suicidal to the entire institute.

—How lucky I saw you, did you lose consciousness?

He tried to babble something and nodded his head, he didn't really know he was babbling but he was afraid it wasn't coherent.

—There you were! —commented a young redhead.

He didn't know if he had swallowed a lot of water, but the young man was the same one from his dreams, he seemed very familiar and very coincidental.

—Do you know her? —Matías asked.

—I'm new in her neighborhood, she wasn't feeling very well and that's why we came for a walk so she could get some air, but from what I see, you've saved her...

"Yeah, so you weren't much help," Matyas snapped.

—I apologize, you can continue doing what you were doing, and I thank you for helping her. "I can take her home, he'll keep an eye on her," the redhead continues.

Matyas looks suspiciously at Elize and searches for an answer in her gaze, but she could only open her eyes vehemently but couldn't dare to say anything to him, because she would realize that she wasn't okay. I didn't know who this guy was or what he was looking for, so I couldn't prove that he was weak.

—And how do I know that what you say is true? You may be a stranger. “At least I go to his school,” Matyas insisted.

—If you go to his school, you've noticed that he hasn't been in three months, right? —adds the redhead.

Matyas remains with a doubtful expression. Me too, how can a stranger know how long I've missed school?

—I don't know, brother, we don't know each other that well, but I haven't seen her these days.

—Maybe you should pay more attention then. I know where she lives, I can take care of her, I will take her home. She is hospitalized and that is why she has not gone to school. "When the semester starts, you'll see us both, trust me," the redhead snapped.

Matyas looks at Elize again and seems to even forget her presence as he continued talking with the subject, he exuded sympathy and warmth, the redhead begins to take off his coat and cover Elize with it.

—Because she was hospitalized?

—Nothing serious, she had a breast operation. So he needed rest.

Matyas turns red and tries not to look at her breasts, Elize, undaunted, tried to say no with her eyes, but when she least realized it, the strange guy was carrying me in his arms.

—Can I give you my number and you can let me know when she is home?

"Sure," the redhead answers. "But you see that my arms are full, write down my number, it's 954-2244957."

-Brilliant. Thanks brother.

And Matyas leaves, so he starts praying inside that his organs don't end up in Korea. That is to say, what she said about wanting to die, maybe she wasn't so serious, she didn't want to suffer, it was clear or she was going to be dismembered. But curiously, the redhead is actually heading home.

—Stop doing stupid things. Now they won't let you leave your house until you prove that you're really not going to take your own life.

"I won't do anything else," he tried to say. Although I didn't know if that really sounded like I wanted.

He rings the doorbell at her house and is greeted by her father, surprised to see her soaked.

—My God, what happened? We were looking for you, Elize, daughter, where were you?

—He only ran away because there was a party on the coast. You know, young people and summer.

"It's not even summer," his father snapped. "And who are you?"

—I'm a classmate. My name is Sasha, anyway, I was just coming to accompany you. I'm sorry sir.

"Okay...I guess," said her father, taking Elize in his arms. "Do you live around here?"

—Oh, yeah, I live in the new building a block from here. I have recently moved.

"Yes, they are building a lot of buildings around here," answered his father thoughtfully.

-Exact. It's a nice area. Well, I'll go, you know where to look for me if you need me.

—Wait, do you know Elize's situation? —he asked him.

—Oh, I don't know anything, sir. I just know that Elize was a little lost at the party, we didn't even talk much. That's why I figured maybe I should bring her home.

"Okay, thank you," my father said finally and closed the door.

The next thing after that was not leaving the room again without being watched. Her mother slept with her and her father sometimes locked my door. I knew I had done things wrong, so this was normal. And I also knew I had worried them, but it wasn't over yet. He would get through this, recover, and try again.

But in addition to planning her movements when everyone stopped watching her and she seemed completely recovered, she couldn't stop thinking about the red-haired young man. Wasn't it the one I had seen before I closed my eyes when I took the pills? Could he be the one who made me vomit? No, it was just a coincidence. But anyway, where did it come from? And why did he bother to hide his secret from Matyas or his father? Did he really live in the neighborhood? And what were his intentions with her?

What followed was recovery, an immense and long recovery. Over time, I stopped thinking about the guy who had come and only thought about one thing; recover. People like her would not be understood in this world, I couldn't even explain to anyone that there is nothing that forces you to live a life if you don't want it. She always knew she didn't want to do it, but she knew what these things do to families, she knew she was an only child, she knew she had a lot of things that would complicate her departure from this world, but in the end, it had to be just her decision. . . Although it is a bit contradictory to want to die at sixteen, but I thought it was the ideal age. I knew that the world outside was full of darkness, that it would carry me in its stomach, that it would chew me up, I didn't want anything that everyone dreamed of, I longed for a heaven of cotton and velvet, I didn't want a life of misery at all.

It is indisputable that my life was not miserable at all, in fact, I was not r***d, I was not beaten when I was a child, nor did I experience any trauma. But here's the thing, she was tired of living with her head. She knew that many would not understand it, if she could change, she would have done it, but not for her, but for them.

But all attempts ended when he was better and ran away from home again. The red-haired guy had told his father a great truth and that is that many buildings had been built in my neighborhood. Most of them had security, but they had a technique, waiting for someone to leave before they could enter. So this way he bypassed the buildings' security system, and in the end, it wasn't a big deal. As I was going up the elevator I could only think about one thing, how can someone his age have such strong desires to leave this world as to want to throw himself off a building? It's really a horrible death if you think about it, you have to climb too high to make sure you won't be bothered by the fall, but he didn't want to throw himself on the road, he had thought too much about it, and the chances of dying were slim, but the chances of him dying were slim. being paralyzed for life were even higher, and spending three months recovering from an overdose had been enough.

So the elevator was taking forever, people meanwhile went up and down a few floors higher and he said to himself that these were the last people he would see, that is, the last people who would see me. Surely after causing a problem, they would find her on the security cameras and interrogate all these people and probably everyone had smiled at her in the process, but no one really knew what she was about to do.

And he arrived, to the top floor, to the terrace. It was empty so she assumed that someone would know she was there or that she would have little time to be alone there, she had to do it quickly. The terrace was like all the terraces of newly built buildings, with bars and security measures that had to be jumped over to be on the edge. And the more I saw him, I thought that this was the final decision, that he would probably regret it but it wouldn't be until the last moment and it would be too late, so he sighed and threw me away, they weren't things that should be thought about too much.

She could feel the wind hitting her face hard and combing her hair back, and she thought that then the last thing she would feel would be the final blow, but, instead, she felt arms surround her and leave her on the ground. When she opens her eyes, she sees him again, the red-haired guy.

—You again?!

—You were going to do something crazy. "And I can't allow it," he replied.

—And who are you to decide what is crazy and what is not? —she snapped angrily on the ground.

"No one," he admitted. Look, I understand that no one should force you to live if you don't want to, but believe me it's a mistake if you die.

"Okay," he said, trying to understand his logic. Let's see, you tell me why it is a mistake for me to die, but not before telling me how you did to save me, what the hell you are.

—I'm an angel, I actually come from the future. I came to make sure you don't do this.

Well, that would explain the flying thing...

—Look, whether you come from the past or the future, in any case I know myself and I know that I wasn't going to do much for humanity so you could leave me alone if you understand what I'm saying...

—You see, in the future you will be a doctor, and you will find the cure for cancer—he snaps.

— Cure for cancer? —he replied—I don't even want to study medicine.

—I shouldn't give you information about the future, I'm just here to stop you from doing what you were trying to do because you're important, Elize.

—Okay, this gets weirder, you know my damn name.

—Anyway, I know you haven't suffered anything, nothing compared to people around the world, you should stop that selfish attitude when I'm telling you that you could make a difference in the world.

—And why should I be the difference? Can't you do it with someone else?

"No," he says with a rigid gesture.

—And when you say that this discovery happens, what will I make? —I ask incessantly.

—When you're ready you'll know.

—And now I'm not?

—You just ran away from your house again and you wanted to leave your family with immense pain, of course you're not ready, you can't stop thinking about yourself. You'll understand when you stop seeing for yourself.