CHAPTER 1
It was a cloudy, gray morning when I woke up in my old room to the sound of a very loud alarm clock going off. After a couple minutes of lying in bed, debating whether or not I should get up, I rose from the bed to get ready for school. Luckily, I remembered to pack an extra pair of underwear. Last weekend, when I stayed at my mom’s house, I forgot a pair and had to dig around in some old drawers.
I found an old pair of small, pink polka-dotted underwear to wear. I’m pretty sure they were from middle school. I was unable to go to my apartment before class to change, so I had to wear them all day long. Due to the size I was uncomfortable and had to make frequent visits to the bathroom to try and adjust to make them more comfortable. I promised myself I would never forget underwear again and to throw out my old delicates next time I was at my mom’s.
I pulled some clothes out of my backpack to change. I threw my wild, wavy blonde hair up into a high ponytail, trudged down the stairs and decided to do some last-minute studying before class. I opened my laptop, pulled out my books and notes, and started working on an essay for my business class.
“Rosie, are you coming into the bakery today? I have a big cupcake order I need to finish, and I’m going to need help closing up,” my mom asked as she put her purse over her shoulder and picked up her keys.
I had been so engrossed in my writing, I hadn’t heard my mother walking down the stairs and practically jumped out of my seat. “Geez Mom, a little warning next time!” I gasped and put my hand over my heart to try and stop it from beating so fast.
“Sorry, honey, I didn’t think I was going to scare you,!” she chuckled and opened a kitchen cupboard to pull out a protein bar.
“Sure,” I answered sarcastically and then changed my tone so she knew I wasn’t teasing. “I just have a couple classes this morning, and some studying to do, and then I’ll head over afterwards. You know what, I’ll just eat my lunch and study home, and then head over to the bakery afterwards,” I decided and stood up from the barstool in front of the kitchen counter and gathered my things.
“Thanks, sweetie. I think your sister is coming in too. She said she had a test this morning and then she was meeting Jake for lunch. Those two, I tell ya. I think I hear wedding bells,” my mom sang.
She was a pretty woman, with curly blonde hair and hazel eyes that quite frequently had dark circles around them from getting up early to open the bakery. Despite her always looking tired, she had more energy than I had in my pinky. Growing up, I felt like I struggled keeping up with her, rather than the other way around.
“Oh boy.” I rolled my eyes and followed her out the back door to climb into our cars.
“I can finally make my dream wedding cake for her! A stark white cake with pink gum paste roses cascading down the side. Oh, and it’s going to be a chocolate cake with strawberry frosting and fresh strawberries in the center!” she rambled off as we both opened our car doors and put our bags into the passenger seats.
“Are you sure that’s what Lily wants? I thought she always wanted funfetti cake with fondant swag draping all down the front of the cake?” I asked and smiled at her, wondering if she caught my hint of teasing.
“She does not!” she piped and made a face at me.
I shrugged my shoulders, “You never know! That girl changes her mind all the time.”
“It’s true!” she called, “I have to get to work. Tell Lily to call me, I want to hear how her date with Jake went. I haven’t heard from her all weekend!”
“Okay, I will. Love you!” I called back and climbed into my car and drove to school.
My last comment was true. Lily had changed her major probably three different times within the last couple of years and, for the moment, had decided on becoming a teacher, so she had been taking a lot of education classes. But because she had changed her major so many times, she had a bunch of pointless classes that weren’t going toward her degree. She had painting classes when she wanted to become an artist, accounting classes when she thought about becoming a CPA, and even chemistry classes when she thought about being pre-med. Which, I gotta say didn’t last long, because she didn’t do so hot in chemistry.
For now, Lily was stuck on becoming an elementary teacher. She really liked the idea of playing with kids all day and having a long summer vacation. Unlike my sister, I always knew what I wanted to do: I wanted to become a baker and major in business to help my mom run her small business.
For years, I’d watched my mom get up early, head into the bakery and make dozens of cupcakes and cookies, and decorate the most beautiful cakes. She always said that it was her creative outlet, that she could eat and never get bored of it. Every customer was unique and always wanted something different, nothing was ever the same. It was her passion and she loved it, and I grew to love it too.
Once I entered high school, I started getting up early with my mom and helped prepare things for opening. Then I would go to school and right after school go back to the bakery. My mom was constantly working at the bakery and trying to earn her bachelor's degree. She was the hardest working woman I have ever met. During my junior year, she graduated and was able to find a full-time job that she could do from home. Her work schedule enabled her to continue running her bakery and hire more help, which included me.
After I graduated high school, I was able to earn a scholarship that paid for my schooling, and I moved out of the house and started attending Truman University close to home. My sister and I had watched my poor mom struggle financially for years after my dad left. I decided I wanted to leave the house as soon as I could to ease some of her burden, so she could get caught up on bills and life.
The moment my sister graduated high school, she decided to move in with me, so we could split the rent. This left my mom all alone in an all too quiet house, which sometimes left her depressed. My sister and I decided to go visit every once and a while, and spend time with our mom.
This weekend, Lily didn’t come to Mom’s with me, because she and her long-term boyfriend Jake had a special date planned all day Saturday, and then she had a lot of studying to catch up on. Jake was always hanging out in our apartment, which didn’t help Lily’s study habits. When she failed a couple of classes her first semester, she made a vow to herself to not stay up late, and make time for studying. This semester, she was doing a little better, but she usually ended up playing catch up on the weekends or whenever Jake was busy doing something without Lily. This happened on rare occasions, but when it did, Lily would get a lot accomplished.
My mom and I had debated whether or not Jake was going to pop the question this weekend and waited to hear from her, but she never called us. I was tempted to call her and see what was going on, but thought better of it. She and Jake were probably enjoying time together without me in the room.
Lily had been dating Jake since her sophomore year of high school. They met each other on the swim team and immediately hit it off, and had been together ever since. It hadn’t, however, always been rainbows and butterflies with their relationship. There had been many growing pains from going through high school and the drama that came with it, deciding which college to attend, whether or not they would remain together, and the plain old relationship drama that came around every once in a while. Nevertheless, through their roller coaster of a relationship, they were still together and loved each other more for it.
I thought Lily and Jake were the cutest couple on the planet. I was secretly hoping that Jake had popped the question to Lily on their special date, but she would have called if that had happened. She loved him so much, she hardly knew what to do with herself. She was constantly talking about the boy and I often wondered if they were ever going to tie the knot. Granted, Lily was only twenty and some would say that they were too young, but in my opinion “when you know, you know”.
I never had the opportunity to feel that kind of love. I didn’t date a whole lot in high school, and my life became enveloped in the bakery and helping my mom. My dad left us when I was eight and Lily was only six. Mom doesn’t tell us a lot about why he left, just that he didn’t want to be a dad anymore and wanted to live a life free of responsibility. What I did know was that it broke my mom's heart. She was a stay-at-home mom and hadn’t worked since I was born. The moment he left, she knew that she would have to work hard to be able to take care of us.
She found a full-time job working at a grocery store in the bakery department, and after a few years of practicing how to frost cakes and developing her own recipes, she opened up her own side business to make a little extra cash. This all happened while going to night school to earn her bachelor's degree, not to mention, trying to raise two daughters all by herself. That’s why I committed myself to working so much in the bakery.
I promised myself to make sure I received an education, so that no matter what, I had something to fall back on, instead of trying to fit it in later in life. I wanted to be prepared for life and its unexpected surprises as best as I could. I chose a relationship with work and school rather than actual human people. Which was a sacrifice I was willing to make for the time being. Once I finished school and figured out a job, then I would reevaluate life and go from there. So, I guess in a way, I never gave myself the opportunity to fall in love because I put other priorities first.
Lily didn’t have the same view as me, which became frustrating at times. She was all about the boys, the popularity status and being involved in extracurricular activities like sports, choir and attending every high school sporting event. Once Jake entered her life, this only got worse. Her life became all about Jake. Granted, she still worked at the bakery a few times a week, but I could tell she had her attention on something else. She lightened up a little bit after high school, and realized that family and relationships were more important than whether she had gone to the football game over the weekend. But, still, her life revolved around fun and boys, and mine was focused on preparing for a future. Neither were necessarily wrong or right, just different…even if I thought mine was right.