Everything seemed to be in a haze. My thoughts, my wishes, my consolations.
The torture of holding anything inside is more pretentious than anything that could be poisonous.
I wished that things weren't the way they have came down on me. Since I was twelve everything in my life had gone the way I wished them not to.
But as I stood at my mom's grave, I let the air brush the hair off my face. I kept down her favourite purple orchids and prayed for her peace and sanity in heaven.
Perhaps she did made the wrong decision by staying back with dad. Did she ever knew the kind of the man dad was? Did she still care the same for him after knowing his dirty secrets, if she ever even did?
He was a man with zero self respect and his actions only fed his pride, giving him more power.
"I'm sorry.", Was all I could mumble to mom.
Tonight was going to be a tough one for this family. It wasn't like this family had never seen crisis. From mom's death, to threats, to me running away, to family disputes.
But tonight was definitely going to be a big one affecting our lives for good or bad. For once and for all.
I went back inside the house.
"We'll leave for the dinner at six.", Margaret announced, making me look up to her.
It was the day of rehearsal dinner. A prewedding little conciliation. Tonight was the night I had decided to finally confront dad.
I smiled looking up at Margaret who sat enjoying a casual conversation with Sarah. Carol was playing with Elizabeth and Charlotte.
I looked at them, realising that their lives, our lives was going to change forever by what I was going to do but I had to do it.
For better or for worse!
I went upstairs and took a little detour before going inside my room.
Once I finally reached my room I was rather greeted by a number of people who sat with tongs, equipments and boxes.
Rosita appeared from behind me.
"They're here to prepare you for tonight's dinner. There's going to be media and people. The mayor wanted you to look presentable so.... These people will help you get ready.", She said and I didn't feel like wasting my energy on her as after tonight I might as well not even see her again and get rid of her for once and for all.
I simply nodded and let the team of people work their magic on me and toast me for tonight's dinner.
After my make up was done giving me a light touch, I looked up and saw Rosita standing right next to Margaret and Sarah who watched me in awe.
"I still can't believe you're getting married.", Sarah mumbled walking near me and hugging me tightly.
"Sorry Mrs. Justice, but you'll have to wait until her hair are done.", The hair dresser mumbled with a sly smile afraid to show an attitude knowing the consequences she might suffer.
"Well... We better get used to that. Given that the mayor's wife will always have people dolling her up.", Margaret said and I stayed put.
The Mayor's wife! What a mock! Only if anybody ever knew the plans that the mayor had for me.
The hair dresser curled my hair as I watched myself in the mirror and felt a sting running down my veins.
All my life... I was told to be good to others because I carried a reputation. But tonight I had to exceed my limits and stand for the right thing.
I put the dress on and the stylist helped me adjust the straps that covered the back of the dress. The dress ended in my mid thigh and sparkled with shades of coral and glitter.
I knew I was going to hurt a lot of people, but I had to do what was right. I can't step down. Either it's this today or everything goes down to nothing as I end up at the altar the next day which I couldn't afford at any cost.
I looked myself at the mirror as the Margaret came in and stood behind me that I saw through her reflection.
I turned around and saw her smiling at me with a hint of mist in her eyes.
I stepped towards her and hugged her.
She definitely deserved better, better than my father and his cruel intentions and scrumptious crimes.
Soon everyone started leaving for the dinner one by one.
I heaved a sigh as I waited for everyone to leave as I was supposed to arrive later than everyone.
Rosita stood by my side briefing and preparing me for the dinner.
I saw dad leave right in front of me in a car with Margaret and Carol. His expressions were calm and subtle. But everything was going to change after a few more hours.
My anxiety rolled up inside my blood system building a more non randomised beating pattern.
As I sat inside my car something tinged me but I maintained my posture and held onto my clutch.
Throughout the way I felt my heart cringing and my lungs suffocating and asking for air.
I wasn't even listening to what Rosita was telling me. All I cared about was making things right for once and for all.
The car finally halted and Rosita made her way outside, holding out the door for me.
As soon as I stepped out I wasn't only met with the flashing cameras but rows and rows of screaming crowds held against the barriers and guards that stood paving a way towards the entrance of the hotel in which the dinner was being held.
I was rather confused to see around a thousand of people lunging and gasping for air crushed together yet screaming with joy.
"What are these people for?", I asked Rosita, walking in, looking deliberately towards the crowd.
"What makes you think, Mr. Mayor sits in the office for? It's his people who made him who he is today and they love him.", She said.
As I stepped closer towards the crowd I saw them holding posters, pictures, frames of their Mr. Mayor with words of love, affection and prayer written on it.
"They worship him.", I looked up at her and saw her smiling. "Anyone who has ever tried to hurt him they have to go through them first.", She completed with a hint of satisfaction on her face.
A wave of anxiety rushed inside me.
I felt rather felt tinged at making things right now.
There was no way if dad's truth ever came out, the people of this town would let Margaret and Carol or even me live in peace. But my first priority was definitely keeping Marge and Carol at harm's distance.
I made my way inside and was welcomed by a gush of beautifully decorated hallway. The tables of round and rectangular arranged in sets of even and odd numbers making it adjustable for everyone.
The entrance was decorated with large curtains of rust and gold with matching the flowers and the decorations around the hall and the table.
Lights were arranged beautifully to illuminate the entire hall with shades of gold and brown.
"Welcome Mrs. Mayhew!", I heard a girl call and I looked up to her and saw her looking at me.
"I . . . I'm not Mrs. Mayhew!", I tried convincing her.
"But you'll soon be!", I heard another woman's name call out as I turned around and saw Aunt Monica standing right angled to me.
She wore a beautiful beige gown that sparkled with the beautiful shiny beads covering it.
She smiled as she walked up to me.
"You look extremely beautiful.", She said holding my face gently, cupping in to peck my forehead. "I'm so happy that you and Brandon are getting married. He's definitely going to lose himself once he sees how beautiful you look tonight.", She smiled and I felt tinged at the pain I'll be causing her after tonight.
I could only manage to form a small smile at the corner of my lips.
The hall was already gushed with guests and people.
Everyone greeted each other. My eyes trailed and followed dad standing at a corner, his face was towards me so I could get a clear picture of him talking to men surrounding him.
For the world -- he was just a man who was the father of the girl marrying the mayor.
But to that girl, she was being framed, used and forced by the Mayor and her father was a potential murderer.
I heard my name being called out and I turned around to see Laura and Kevin making their way towards me.
I haven't seen them for a long now. I don't even remember seeing them at the in-house party neither at the bachelor's party.
"You look so good!", Laura exclaimed with happiness once she saw me and I returned back her enthusiasm with a small smile.
"Where's Mr. Mayor?", She said that more like a sarcasm. "You must be really happy right?"
I couldn't understand her tone but something definitely was weird about it.
She made me realise that even I hadn't seen Brandon anywhere near.
I saw another tall figure standing behind Laura more like being despicable.
Every anxiety and every tension seemed to dissolve. My stressed muscles relaxed once I saw that guy standing tall.
Him being there was a definite surprise to me and somehow my only silver lining in the entire rain storm.
I immediately excused Laura and made my way towards him. He was already looking at me with a sly smile.
He smiled whole heartedly once he saw me.
"You . . . What . . . How?", I asked looking at his tall self.
Once I was near him I noticed his features, taking him in completely.
Nothing was changed about him. He still looked the same adorably handsome, no sign of greys on him or wrinkles to make him look old or changed. His hair were still sleeked and his posture was as daunted as ever. It reminded me back of the day I saw him years ago when he just was some delegate at an auction to me. Little did I know that he was going to be my Uncle.
"Why would I miss my daughter's wedding?", He said with a smirk and I immediately leaped him into hug.
Hugging him brought me back all the good memories with him. He had always loved me like his own daughter and cared for me. Even when I lived with him in New York, he cared more for me than even my own father.
In fact having him tonight with me, when I needed someone to support me and be there to hold me strong.
"Thank you so much for coming.", I said still hugging him tight and keeping my head on his shoulder.
I could feel myself on the verge of tears.
He broke our brace and held my face tightly.
"I'm glad to be here for you.", He smiled and I forced a one.
Soon a hand held his shoulder and he turned around still keeping his arm down my shoulders.
"Don't forget to introduce me.", Claire spoke as she stood standing, radiating beauty and discretion in a white sequin short dress.
"I think we've already met?", Claire stated reminding of the last awkward encounter with her.
Which again reminded me of dad's lies making me look at him as he looked at me through a crowd and raised his glass at me with a smile yet I stayed put.
I held onto Uncle's arm on my shoulder.
"Thank you so much for coming.", I told them both and excused myself to catch some air that my lungs desperately were gasping for.
Every body sat around and took their seats. I sat at the central family specific table where mine and Brandon's family was supposed to sit.
Sitting there made me realise that Brandon still hadn't showed up and neither did Mr. Mayhew.
I looked across the table and saw wrinkles plastered on Aunt Monica's face. She looked at me and tried soothing her expressions down but I could tell that nothing was working.
I saw Jean walking up to me and leaned down as he gestured for me to listen to him. I leaned in my ear to listen to him.
"I'm sorry but Mr. Mayor and Mr. Joseph Mayhew can't make it to the dinner. They're stuck in an errand.", He whispered against my ear too carefully for anyone to listen.
"Please tell everyone to continue the dinner, as listening from you would seem much more better in this situation.", Jean pleaded.
Not having Brandon present at the dinner was just a cherry on top for me.
Everything was just going in my favor up till now and I wish it just goes as I had wished upon it for.
I looked up at dad and saw him sitting peacefully at one corner alongside Marge and Uncle Daniel.
I looked around at the table and saw everyone happy and cheery.
I heaved a sigh and nodded to Jean. I got up clinking the glass with a spoon, grabbing everyone's attention.
"I'm extremely sorry but Brandon and Mr. Mayhew are stuck running an important errand for the office.", I said and a wave of murmurs sparked inside the entire hall.
I rolled my eyes already exhausted enough. I looked around the tables and saw Laura and Kevin sitting at a corner. The two sat silently not even looking towards the table that I sat at. They weren't even talking to each other, but rather sat still looking down at their glasses silently.
"They sincerely apologize for not being able to make it up for tonight and they'd wish their best to everyone and hope the dinner goes on.", I smiled and sat back down at my seat.
The rest of the dinner went on with everyone eating and talking about the usual. Luckily for me the toast speeches were cut off due to the absence of Brandon and Joseph Mayhew.
Everything was top notch exquisite making me realise that people in this town are extremely used to of luxury and comfort and what I had been through proved that I had more of my mother's genes than my father's.
Soon the guests started leaving and my anxiety rose inside me.
It's about time!
Things go down now!
Soon after everyone left, Aunt Monica greeted me a goodbye and left. Sarah sent Carol and her daughters home as it was way past their bed time.
Now we were left to family! The family. And it was about time.
"Jake will be here tomorrow.", Sarah exclaimed with happiness.
I felt my mouth growing dry and puckering with each passing second as the time to reveal the truth and shun the reality came near.
"Well it's lovely to see you getting married right before us.", Claire said and all I could do was look around at how happy everyone seemed.
As they all indulged in their normal conversation I stayed put looking for the right opportunity to speak.
I felt myself on the verge of breaking down due to the pressure I held inside my brain and heart.
"I still remember when you were born.", Dad said exclaiming through breaths as he gulped down his wine.
I looked down at my purse and grabbed out the tablet I snuck in.
I opened a file in it and I knew that everyone must be looking at me but I simply placed it down right in front of dad.
"How about remembering this?", I c****d an eyebrow looking right at him.
I held my shaking breath and my quivering body from exploding and maintaining my stance.
Dad looked down at the device and found the associate files and proofs of his association with the Paiges, including the office sealed deal.
He slid the tablet back, right at me and chuckled a bit.
His coldness wasn't troubling or scaring me but his potential response was.
"Do you remember when I used to tell you as a kid to not to sneak into my study?", He said placing down the glass and looking over at Margaret who had worry plastered all over her face, "It was for a reason.", He stated looking back at me with coldness.
"I also remember you being the good guy dad. What happened to that?", I asked.
"We all explode.", He stated briefly.
He wasn't confessing and his confession was what I wanted to listen the most.
"What's going on? What . . . What are you guys talking about in code words?", Sarah asked in bewilderment.
"Is everything okay?", Margaret asked with horrified expressions.
"No. . . Dad. . . Do you want me to?", I said looking at him with a warning expression.
"You know, you don't actually have to.", He said getting up but he didn't leave rather he walked near the bar, placed near by and poured himself a drink.
"You see. . .", He began with a casual shrug, "The reason why your fiancé couldn't make it today is because he's most probably dead in the attack that happened to him on his way."
Dad's words made everyone in the room gasp for air as tension stressed the air out of the room.
"What the f**k are you saying?", Uncle Daniel spoke.
I stayed put, my eyes were glued to dad and his every moment.
"Yeah. . . What the f**k are you saying?", I heard a familiar voice coming from behind me.
My heart dropped down in my stomach as everyone in the room turned towards the source.
My eyes fell out of their sockets, as my anxiety churned my guts by holding them tightly.
Bad things were about to happen!