Remember me..

5. Don't look back

Embla.

The crisp morning air bites at my skin as I slip out into the forest. The trees loom around me, their branches reaching out like grasping fingers in the pre-dawn gloom. My heart feels like it's being torn in two, by the pull from two directions. The pull of the house behind me, of Erik, is almost unbearable, but I force myself to keep moving. If I glance back, even for a second, my resolve will shatter and I can’t afford that. Not now.

'Do you have any idea where to start looking for this rogue?' I ask Aska silently, my voice tinged with frustration and doubt. My mind spins, desperate for direction, for something to hold on to.

'As a nymph, you have deep connections with nature,' Aska responded, her voice calm. 'If you can tap into that, it might help us track him down. I’m not sure exactly how, but I’d start by closing your eyes and listening to your surroundings. You’ll figure it out.'

Her words feel more like myth than reality, a fairytale woven into my already confusing world. 'This sounds like a fantasy,' I scoffed. 'You really think that’s going to work?'

'No,' Aska admits, her tone softening a little, 'I don’t know any more than you about how to use these abilities, but it’s worth a try. We should cross the border first. It’s not like we’re going to stumble upon him here on pack grounds.'

I let out a slow breath, she’s right. I nod, even though she can’t directly see me, before picking up my pace. The soft thud of my boots was muffled by the damp forest floor. The trees grow denser as we approach the border. Luckily we had not crossed paths with anyone on our way here, this early it would mainly have been one of the wolves patrolling the border. They would have notified Erik right away and I don’t think I would have been able to slip away again. Past the border, the forest was unnervingly quiet, other than the occasional rustle of leaves or the sharp snap of a twig beneath my feet. The silence presses in on me, amplifying the pounding of my heart.

'I think it’s time to try, Embla,' Aska urges, her voice more insistent now. 'It’s not going to help us if we just wander around blind.'

I hesitate for a moment. 'Yeah, sure,' I mutter, my scepticism lingering like a bad taste. 'I don’t know how this is supposed to work, but I guess it’s worth a try.'

I stopped in my tracks and closed my eyes, letting the forest envelop me. The sounds around me grow louder—the rustling of leaves in the faint breeze, the distant call of a bird. I feel the ground beneath my feet, the hum of life pulsing just below the surface as if the earth itself is breathing. The scents of moss, wet bark, and the sharp tang of cold air fill my lungs, grounding me.

Slowly, I tried to stretch out my awareness, reaching for the connection Aska spoke of, hoping for a sign. Nothing.

'Maybe we need to try elsewhere?' Aska suggested.

I frowned, staring at the thick undergrowth ahead of us, the weight of indecision pressing heavily on my chest. The forest seemed endless, each tree blending into the next, offering no clear path, no sign of where to go. 'Hmm, yeah... maybe we can try,' I murmured, my voice quieter than I intended. 'But I’m not even sure if what I’m doing is the right thing. What if I’m just... lost?'

The words felt heavier once spoken, hanging in the air between us like a fog that refused to clear. My frustration simmered just beneath the surface, mixing with a growing sense of helplessness. It wasn’t just about the rogue anymore, it was about me, about these strange abilities I barely understood, and the fear that I might never figure it out.

'You felt the difference,' Aska urged her tone more forceful this time, a quiet intensity that made me pause. 'I know you did. What you did back there... that wasn’t because you’re a werewolf!'

Her words echoed in my mind, stirring something deep within me, something I couldn’t quite grasp. I closed my eyes, trying to remember the moment. The shift in the air, the way the forest seemed to hum beneath my skin, responded to me. It hadn’t felt like the usual heightened senses that came with being a werewolf. No... this had been something else entirely, deeper, older, like I had tapped into a part of myself that I had never known existed.

But even with that faint flicker of recognition, doubt still gnawed at me. 'What if I was imagining it?' I whispered, almost afraid to admit it aloud. 'What if it’s just... wishful thinking?'

Aska’s presence felt closer now as if she were wrapping herself around my thoughts, guiding me. 'You weren’t imagining anything. You’re more than what you think you are, Embla. You have to trust that. Trust yourself.'

I opened my eyes and took a slow, steadying breath. The wind stirred the leaves above, a soft rustle that felt almost like a response as if the forest itself was waiting for me to listen again. I allowed a small spark of hope to break through the haze of uncertainty. Maybe Aska was right. Maybe I had felt something more, something that wasn’t tied to my wolf at all, but to a part of me that was still awakening.

Hours pass as we search, the world around us shifting from soft morning light to the dull, oppressive glow of a clouded afternoon. The forest feels endless, an unbroken sea of trees and shadows that stretch on and on.

My muscles had started aching, a dull, throbbing pain that was settling into my bones, but I pushed through it, forcing my feet to keep moving. The gnawing hunger in my stomach sharpens with each passing minute, twisting painfully inside me, but I can't stop. I won't stop. Not yet, not when so much is riding on this. I need to find this rouge.

'Embla,' Aska’s voice cuts through the fog of my determination, startling me. There's a softness in her tone, but also concern, something I’ve tried to ignore. 'We need food and rest. You’re exhausted.'

For a moment, I pretend not to hear her, my gaze still scanning the forest floor, searching for any sign, any clue. But I knew she felt my exhaustion, she is after all a part of me. My legs tremble beneath me, and I realize I’ve been running on sheer willpower for far too long.

'Ok, you take over then, that's our best way of finding food at least' I said and let Aska take over. She did not hesitate and in a moment we were standing there in our wolf form. This time I could actually take a moment to enjoy the sensation of being in wolf form, how strong we felt and our heightened senses was an incredible feeling.

Aska set off into the forest in search of food, her powerful legs carrying us swiftly through the dense underbrush. Twigs snapped underfoot, and leaves brushed against our fur, but we moved with grace and precision. Our nose twitch as we search for prey. The forest comes alive in a new way through our wolf senses - every rustle of leaves, every distant scurry of paws, and every subtle scent tells a story. I let myself sink into the background, marvelling at how naturally Aska moves in this form. She is fluid, instinctual and connected to the rhythm of the forest in a way I could only dream of.

Suddenly, Aska freezes, her ears perking forward. My heart skipped a beat as I caught it too, the faint, rapid heartbeat of a rabbit, not far ahead. The sound was like a soft drum in the stillness, pulsing with life. We crept forward, paws silent against the forest floor, the scent of the rabbit growing stronger. Its obliviousness was almost tragic, nibbling on leaves as though nothing in the world could harm it.

In a blur of movement, Aska lunged. The rabbit tried to dart away, but we were too fast. Our jaws close around its neck, and the hunt ends in an instant. The taste of blood filled our mouth, warm and coppery, stirring something deep within me. Part of me recoiled at the rawness of it, the finality of taking a life. But another part, a deeper, more primal part, relished the hunt, the power in it, the connection to something wild and ancient.

As we devoured our meal, I felt strength returning to our limbs. The gnawing hunger subsides, now replaced by a warm contentment. The primal satisfaction of the kill, the nourishment of fresh meat, soothed the edges of my exhaustion. When we finish, Aska finds a small stream, the soft trickle of water beckoning us, and we lap at the cool water, washing away the last traces of blood from our muzzle. The simple act of eating and drinking has restored some of my energy, but a bone-deep weariness still lingers.

We should rest a little,' Aska suggested, her thoughts gentle as they mingled with mine. 'There’s a sheltered spot beneath those fallen trees. That should keep us hidden.'

I don't argue. Our body aching for some rest, my mind spinning from the exertion of the hunt and the overwhelming flood of sensations that came with being in this form. We pad over to the makeshift den, circling twice before settling down. The earth was cool beneath our fur, the scent of decaying leaves and damp wood filling our nostrils. Oddly, the scent was comforting, grounding us in the present moment.

As our eyes begin to close, a flicker of movement catches our attention. Aska tense, muscles coiled and ready to spring, but it was only a butterfly. Its delicate wings were a vibrant blue, standing out starkly against the muted forest backdrop. It fluttered, weightless and fragile, before landing on a nearby flower. I felt an unexpected pull, something deep and unfamiliar.

Without thinking, I pushed forward, taking control of our shared body. Our wolf form began to melt away, fur receding as I shifted back into my human self. The forest seemed sharper, more vivid now, and the butterfly held my attention like nothing else had. I reached out toward it, my fingers trembling slightly.

As my hand nearest the butterfly, I feel a faint thrumming, a subtle vibration in the air. The sensation grows stronger, pulsing through my hand and up my arm. It’s not unpleasant, just... strange and unfamiliar. The butterfly’s wings twitched, and suddenly, I became intensely aware of its life force, a delicate, shimmering energy that danced before my eyes.

'Embla,' Aska’s voice was hushed, filled with awe. 'What are you doing?'

I shake my head slightly, unable to find the words to explain. The connection deepens, and I can sense the butterfly’s heartbeat, and feel the air currents beneath its wings. Without thinking, I reached out with my mind, coaxing the creature closer. To my amazement, it fluttered from the flower and landed gently on my outstretched finger.

A soft gasp escapes my lips, breaking the spell. The butterfly takes flight, disappearing into the forest canopy, leaving me staring at my hand. I flexed my fingers, half expecting to see some visible change, but there was nothing. Still, the experience had left me shaken, in awe of what had just happened.

'That...' I start, my voice barely above a whisper. 'That... that was incredible.' I'm still staring at my hand, my mind reeling from what just happened. 'Aska, did you feel that? It was like I could sense its very essence.'

'I felt it,' Aska confirms, her voice filled with excitement and wonder. 'Embla, this is it. This connection to nature, to living things, it’s part of your nymph abilities.'

I close my eyes, trying to recapture the sensation, but it’s elusive, like trying to grasp smoke. Still, echoes of it lingered in the back of my mind. The forest around me feels different, more alive, more... aware.

'But how do we use this to find the rogue?' I ask, my eyes scanning the trees. 'He’s not going to be as cooperative as a butterfly.'

Aska is quiet for a moment, contemplating. 'Maybe... maybe we can use it to sense disturbances in the forest. A rogue wolf would leave a trail, wouldn't they? Not just physical tracks, but a kind of... energy imprint?'

The idea is strange, but it makes sense. My thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the rustle of leaves nearby. Two wolves emerge from the underbrush, their presence unmistakable. Aska surged forward, taking control before I had a chance to react, shifting back into our wolf form.

The wolves approached cautiously, their ears perked, tails held high. Aska’s hackles rose, a low growl rumbling in our chest. These weren’t pack wolves—their scents were unfamiliar, wild, tinged with something dangerous.

'Stay calm,' I urged silently. 'We don’t want to provoke a fight.'

The larger of the two, a mottled grey wolf with piercing amber eyes, stepped forward. His lips curled back in a warning, revealing his sharp teeth. Aska’s growl deepened, not aggressive, but assertive, enough to make it clear we wouldn’t back down.

The standoff stretched, tension thick in the air. Then, in a fluid motion, the grey wolf begins to shift. His form shimmered, limbs lengthening until a man stood next to the other wolf, naked and unapologetic.

"This isn’t packed territory, little wolf," he said, his voice low and rough. "It’s dangerous for a lone she-wolf out here, especially a pack wolf."

Aska does not respond, her gaze shifting between the naked man and the second wolf who had yet to shift.

"Relax," the man continued, gesturing toward the stream. "We only came here for fresh water. Is it okay if we go ahead?"

Aska hesitates, she is taken aback by the stranger's request to drink, but she slowly nods, backing away from the stream. She clearly didn’t want them too close, maintaining a cautious distance.

I studied the two rogues, it's not often you see them like this. They didn’t smell like the usual rogues I’d encountered before. There was something odd about them. Before I could ponder it further, the sharp snap of a branch behind us sent a jolt through our bodies.

Aska whirled her head around, our heart pounding as another figure emerged from the shadows. Another rogue, unmistakably so. His fur was matted, his eyes wild and feverish. He was thin, too thin, ribs showing beneath a patchy coat. And his smell, it was rancid, sickly sweet, like rot.

The rogue's lips pull back in a snarl, revealing yellowed teeth. He lunges forward without warning, faster than I would have thought possible given his ragged appearance. Aska barely manages to dodge, his jaws snapping shut inches from our flank.

We circled him, wary. He was unpredictable and desperate. The kind of desperation that made rogues dangerous. And then, behind us, we heard the fast approach of paws, the two other rouges. It was a trap!