Love Behind The Spotlight

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Ayaw mo pa 'ring kausapin? Kawawa na talaga 'yung tao sayo. Like have you forgot kung gaano karaming babae ang gustong mapansin ni Henry pero sayo nagpupumilit magpapansin 'yung tao." Janelle said to me when we all sat down on the sofa, sitting side by side while watching a TV series onscreen.

Lumunok ako bago bumuntong-hininga. "Bakit kasi ipipilit nya pa 'yung sarili nya sa taong ayaw sa kanya?" I said without even looking at them. Tanging sa telebisyon lamang nakatutok ang mata ko, ngunit sa loob-loob ko, halos gusto ko nang maghimutok.

"Have you really turned into a cold person after all these years, Maui? Parang wala kayong pinagsamahan 'nung tao!"

With that words of Lumi, hindi ko na napigilang lumingon habamg may matapang na emosyon sa aking mukha at mata. "Wala naman talaga kaming pinagsamahang dalawa, Lumi. Hindi ko naman talaga sya kilala, kaya tama lang na wala na kaming ugnayang dalawa. His life is too different from us so its better for us all to forget everything." matigas 'kong wika.

Napatayo naman si Janelle sa inis. She look so frustrated. "Tang ina naman, Maui! Hanggang kailan ka ba magiging ganyan? Hanggang kailan kami mangangapa sa dilim ng mga nangyari sa pagitan ninyo noon? We are all friends pero bigla kang nagbago at hindi namin alam kung bakit pati kami kailangang madamay sa issue ninyong dalawa, na umabot pa sa punto na pati pagkaka-ibigan namin sa tao ay nawawala na rin?! God Maui! Hindi na namin alam kung ano ang gagawin at kung saan kami lulugar! It's been years but we doesn't even have a clue about what happened between you two, at kung bakit ka biglang naging ganyan..." wika nito, bago agad na nag-walk out. Wala akong nagawa kung hindi sundan na lamang ng tingin si Janelle habang paakyat ng hagdan at patakbong pumasok ng kwarto niya. Lumi even followed her while Sophie remained with me.

Tahimik lamang kaming dalawa. It feels like Sophie is hesitating but I know that she have a lot of questions in her mind, just waiting for the right time to ask. Knowing that all I did is just to stand and took the remote from the table and press the turned off button of the Television.

"Uuwi na lang muna ako." I simply said, but Sophie immediately stand. "Sandali Maui..."

I sighed deeply before looking at her---eye to eye, before letting out a small smile. "If I can only say everything, then I will do that in a heartbeat, Sophie." I spoke before looking down. "If you feel like I had change, then I won't say anything to that. Kung ayaw nyo na akong maging kaibigan dahil may inililihim ako, then ayos lang sakin. As long as everythings okay with you, ayos lang ako." wika ko bago tuluyan nang umalis duon. I even heard her call my name twice but I didn't turn my head. Dire-diretso akong lumabas ng bahay ni Janelle.

I know that Sophie might be confused now because of all the things I've said, but I don't want to put dirt in their names. Di bale nang ako mag-isa ang masaktan, hindi ko na sila idadamay pa.

I was already at the gate when a man with a black cap suddenly came out of nowhere. Kahit gulat ay nag-angat ako ng tingin duon at pinagmasdan pa ang lalaki. Hes wearing a black shirt inside a white jersey jacket. The cold breeze suddenly hit us that made me sniff his scent, and when I did, it made me stop. My actions got halted.

I know that smell...

"Saan ka pupunta? Aalis ka na? Bakit?" Tanong ng pamilyar na boses na iyon.

I looke down immediately when I got a feeling that our eyes will meet. I gulped, a sign of calming and conditioning myself. "Wala kang pakialam." I said in a cold manner at balak na sana itong lagpasan ng hakliin nito ang braso ko.

"Is this because of me? Are you notified that I'll come?" He asked using his deep voice. Marahan lamang iyon at batid ang pait at sakit.

I clenched my jaw before raising my head to see him fully and to look straightly in his eyes. I was so sure that I can do what's right, but when our eyes met, I immediately feel the trembling of my knees. The emotion present in his eyes is so heartbreaking. Titig na titig ang kulay kayumanggi niyang mata sa akin na para 'bang ipinaparamdam nya sakin ang sakit na nararamdaman nya sa pamamagitan niyon.

I can feel my inside slowly losing its strength to say those practiced words I had in mind. Pakiramdam ko ay hindi ko kayang banggitin sa kanya ang masasakit na salitang iyon...pero kailangan 'kong gawin. Kailangan 'kong sabihin...

I gulped deeply once again before releasing a heavy breath and smirked at him. "You really think you're that special to me? Na porke't alam 'kong darating ka ay aalis na rin ako? Excuse me but I think you're getting too proud of yourself. Oo nga at sikat ka pero hindi lahat ng babae umiikot ang mundo sayo, sorry but you should know that fact." I uttered sharply. His grip to me slightly loosened as pain crossed on his face.

Seconds later, he smirked a little. "I am well-aware of that fact, Maui." His smirk disappeared after that, but his eyes remained focused on me. "After all the years that you've been ignoring me, I think I already created a deep hole for that fact inside my mind, and I already mastered that." Aniya bago nasundan ng pagbaba ng tingin at marahang pag-bitaw sa braso ko.

Wala rin akong nagawa kung hindi ang marahang magbaba ng tingin upang hindi nya makita ang marahang pamumuo ng luha sa sulok ng aking mata.

"You don't need to leave because of me, Maui." He then continue saying. "I asked Janelle to let me join you tonight, hoping that I could have a chance to have a serious talk with you. But then, if your plan will get ruined because of me then I can just go. I can just leave, not you." Dugtong pa nito. I continued looking down but my ears are active. I can hear even the slightest noise coming from him. I heard him gulp twice before taking a step-back.

Nakatalikod na ito nang mag-angat ako ng tingin, saktong pagtulo rin ng luhang kanina pa namumuo sa sulok ng mata ko. My lips trembled as tears continued to roll down. Gusto ko siyang tawagin. Gusto ko siyang hilahin pabalik sa akin at yakapin ng mahigpit. Gusto 'kong sabihin sa kanya na ayoko naman talaga itong ginagawa ko...pero hindi ko magawa.

I opened my mouth as tears rolled down once again. "I'm sorry..." I whispered, only enough for me to hear. I'm sorry, Henry. I'm so sorry for giving you a lot of pain. Kalimutan mo na lang ako, may babaeng mas karapat-dapat sayo...hindi ako.

Hindi ako...

I closed my eyes hard that made all the tears to go out. Napa-hikbi ako nang muling dumilat at makitang wala na duon si Henry. He already left. He left with his heart aching because of me once again.