Forgetting Mellaine

Eerie

They say, we have all the rights to choose our family. That’s what also Mother said to me, those exact words. I had apparently chose to be with someone that I somehow regretted. Tell the truth, I did miss her and I love her as my mother and as the most important person to me at all times, even now. I loved the world we had just for ourselves, a world we lived and do whatever we want; a world where we carried together with our burdens and happiness. We we’re helping hands to each other. Somehow, I saw us as the great team – a special one. We saw things differently. She said that I should always choose the people to be a part of my family, the right ones, and so I did. A lively France who owned a café, the Greys couple who will have their first baby eventually, the competitive Natalia, a Brandon who just started to decide in courting me, the ladies in the organization; those familiar faces who tend to be strangers are now getting to what I can call them as family. And as far as I can tell, staying here is the best that I can do for now. And I guess, it is better than dealing this current load of crap just with myself.

The surprisingly short time is ticking by. Also, the radiant, traitorous sun will eventually rise upon from its rest, yet I still can’t have myself put into bed. I gently wiped my tears with my damped dress. Despite of the fact that I am surrounded with them and my other neighbours that I already knew, I couldn’t let myself be so sure that I am safe. It’s been 2 am in the morning, and I am still on the brilliantly tiled floor beside my bed. I felt the tingling pain on my chest, the moment I saw him. That’s not supposedly him. It shouldn’t be him. Death wouldn’t have his own grudge in letting him bestowed upon me. Just seeing his presence or his slightest shadow, will definitely make me live in the same life I had before. I calmed down somehow enough to begin breathing

“I guess, I just need to take some rest and clear my head.” I said to myself. Slowly, I rose from the floor and climbed unto my bed. Pulling the sheets together, I lay myself down. Looking over the ceiling, the only thing that bothers me the most right now is the opened well-lighted curtained window. I was debating with myself if I should just let it stay like that and head to sleep or take my responsibility to close it. In the end, I carefully stood up and went to it. I slowly sneaked outside. The clear treacherous and ruinous pavements are going their ways beyond the houses on each side. Crickets are making their sounds all over them. I wonder if they could see how long it would take them from jumping just to get to the other side. The wind is also getting colder, entering the window and slowly tugging me within its arms. I felt the shivers down my spine and carefully closed the window and the curtain.

I went back to bed. The least I can do, is to start myself in counting some sheep, or maybe cows or dogs. Anything that can probably make me sleep. I closed my eyes and started to hum the song, Mom used to sing to me before I go to sleep. She would sit beside on the bed, embracing me around her arms and brushing my hair through her fingers. Little by little, I felt my eyes getting heavier and myself dozing off, falling into a dream.

A sudden thin and irritating buzz was screaming beside my head. I slowly reached for it and realized it was my phone. The alarm just started bugging me from my sleep. I sluggishly opened my eyes. The phone’s screen light was shining so bright at my face. I went to my phone’s settings and adjusted the brightness, eventually, turning off the alarm. I looked at the time and realized how many hours I took for sleeping.

I panickingly jumped from my bed and went outside my room, heading to my kitchen. It was already 8 am in the morning. I just also remembered that Brandon will fetch me up by nine. I decided to cook some oatmeal and sliced some bananas and apples. I put them on a plate and headed to the living room. Of course, I was able to buy myself a flat screen television, which I am proud of. I sat on the newly dusted couch and turned on the TV. Enjoying my food, my phone rang and letting me see a message from Brandon.

Good morning. Hope you’re enjoying your breakfast.

I smiled once I read his message. I positioned myself and texted him back.

Good morning too. Currently, eating my breakfast.

I took a spoon of my oatmeal and placed my phone beside me. After a couple of seconds my phone beeped again.

That’s good. Can’t wait to see you :)

Unexpectedly, I felt my heart pounding. It was accelerating. I cupped my chest and heard its beat.

:)

I replied him with a smiley face. I took a piece of the apple I cut, waiting for his reply. I waited for second, but it turned to minutes. Maybe he got himself in his hectic schedule again or maybe I just cut our conversation off. I deeply sighed as soon as I feel my cheeks reddened.

My phone suddenly rang, making me startled. It was a message from him.

How’s your sleep?

How’s..my sleep.. It was worse. No, it was totally awful.

It’s fine.

Liar. I couldn’t take a chance for me to say what happened yesterday’s night. The horrific scenery was a piece of nightmare that I don’t want to remember or be reminded of. Brandon didn’t reply after my last message to him. I decided to go to the kitchen and washed my bowl. I gently switched the faucet on and watered my hands. I grabbed the dishwashing paste and rubbed it thoroughly on the bowl and my spoon. Sighing, I washed them all, dried up and placed them back inside the drawers. I cleaned my damp hands with a towel and walked towards the bathroom. Removing my clothes, I let the crystalline water touched me, flowing it freely. Even if yesterday’s not okay, I would still want today to be good or maybe better.

After I take an oozing bath, I dried myself and chose a dress to wear – a red plain fitted dress, showing carelessly my curves. It wasn’t a fancy one, but I like it how it fits on my body. I gently put a light makeup on my face and my favourite shade of matte lipstick, the Whipped Caviar of Nyx. I thoroughly combed my hair and made a ponytail. It’s sharp nine when Brandon arrived at my place, bringing with him a bouquet of red fresh roses with tulips.

“Hi. Good morning, you’re beautiful as ever. This is for you.” He offered.

“Thank you.”

He opened the car’s door for me and let me inside. He followed and eventually started the engine. He played some music as we travel around the town. The traffic is getting heavier at all times. We decided to go to the C & C to buy some things or maybe have our lunch there too. We arrived at the mall after 30 minutes. Brandon made his way to the parking lot, occupied a space there and eventually took me inside the mall itself. It was crowded - people are quite having their enjoyment for the weekends. Some are busy going to the bookstores to buy something to read. Others are at the department stores to buy some clothes or even groceries. Different scents are around us and it was lovely to have the freedom of doing such things. I smiled and didn’t noticed Brandon’s eyes are upon me.

“You’re enjoying”. He chuckled as he walked beside me. “Let’s go the Beachue’s.” He added with his monotonous voice. Heading to the north side of the mall, we went inside Beachue’s, which is known for their picturesque and mere decorative accessories both for women and men. The saleslady in her mid 20s, wearing her black fitted skirts and a white long sleeves with a red flowered scarfs around her neck, greeted us with her supercilious warm smile.

Brandon went where the necklaces and some bracelets were displayed. As for me, I went to the watches. All of them are lovely to look at. Surrounded with small crystals, a black watch caught my attention. The saleslady is patiently waiting for me on the other side.

“Uhm, can I have a look on this one?” I said, pointing over at the watch. She slowly opened the glassed shelf and took it, placing it gently at the top, where I can have a glance clearly. I touched it with my bare hands and felt the coarse texture of its own strap. The crystals glimmered as well, letting me see how elegant it is to wear. I looked over the price, realized its cost and slowly, I decided to return it when Brandon just bugged beside me, bringing with him a peace of navy blue bag from the store.

Do you like it?” He suddenly asked, looking over the watch I was holding.

“Yes. I can buy it soo---” I promptly said.

“Take it. I’ll pay for it.” He stopped me and smilingly added. He gently took it from me and walked towards the cashier. That damn watch will cost me to work for two weeks. He came back with a smile and opened the box where the watch was smoothly placed. He took it carefully and gently placed it around my wrist.

“You look more beautiful with it.” He said.

I flustered and slightly turned my gaze. “Y-you don’t have to buy it…” I shyly uttered.

“It’s okay. It fits you well.” He added and led me outside the store. We also went to the other departments. Brandon was able to get his hair fixed and buy some new fashioned sweatshirts. On the other hand, he took me on one of the boutiques and got me to choose for three different styled clothes. I grabbed a vast flowered blue dress, a delectable crimson red skirt and a casual black backless. I went to one of their fitting rooms and tried each one of them. I slowly got outside, letting Brandon examined me with each of the clothes I got, while he take some relaxation over the homey lavender floral sofa. Behind it, a long rectangular mirror was placed on the walls, enough for me to see how I am dealing with the clothes. In the end, Brandon loved all that I have picked and bought them for me. He’s acting like a real boyfriend, somehow. I felt a blush on my cheeks. It’s already one in the afternoon when we decided to take our lunch at Bownty’s Full. We sat over the edged table, beside the luminous transparent window of the restaurant, which is good for two. Brandon asked for the menu. We ordered green chile stews, chicken adobo, cioppino and some red velvet and dark chocolate milkshakes. Not to mention, Brandon added banana split too. While waiting for our dish, he said this, “Are you enjoying?” He looked at me intently.

“Yes. Thank you.” I smiled.

“Mind if I take the comfort room for a while?” He asked.

“Sure.”

Standing from his seat, Brandon headed to the comfort room at the other side of the establishment, passing over the counter with some of the restaurant’s staff, handling the customer’s coffee and milkshakes. I looked at my phone, t’was 1:30 pm. Looking over what’s in front of me, a man suddenly sat by the next table, facing our table. He was wearing a dark grey cap and somewhat an oversized blue shirt paired with his shorts and a pair of black sleepers.

My phone suddenly buzzed, having me to look at the new message France had sent me.

"Where are you?"

"I’m at the mall right now."

I replied.

"Oh, okay. Just wanted to check up on you. Are you okay?"

"Silly but thank you. Yes, I’m fine."

"Good. Now, take care always."

"Likewise, France. :)"

She didn’t reply after my last text on her, which made me in playing Candy Crush over my phone. I am starting to love this game just a week ago, and it kind of turned out that I’m having such craze and interest upon this. Just as I reach level 31, Brandon came back to his seat. With a descent smile, the waiter with his fit uniform and a white ribbon tie around his neck, served our orders well, carefully placing each on top of our table. I took a little sip of my red velvet milkshake and let Brandon lead the prayer for our foods. After that, we dig in. I totally agreed that Bownty’s Full also got their own style of cooking. Their promotion and services really got me hooked also. Perhaps, they got some loyal customers here, especially when they’re serving such delicious foods.

“Are you planning to have another work or a new hobby here, Laine?” He suddenly asked, taking an amount of the cioppino.

It’s been this day that Brandon started to call me by that name – Laine. It’s not that bad, since I also used the same nickname during my high school and college years, but most of the people are my close relatives and acquaintances. I thought for a while. Maybe it’s a good thing also to earn and learn more.

“Mmm. Yes, if anything will come, then I’ll probably grab it.” I pondered.

“If you like, you can make your own paintings and have us as your partnership in selling your masterpieces.” He offered.

“That’s a good offer. I’ll talk with France about it too, and maybe she’ll reschedule my working days so I can make some of my paintings at a valuable time. Or maybe she’ll also have some interest with paintings. ” I smiled. I took a glance of the man behind Brandon. I felt a tingling prick at the back of my neck as soon as I see his eyes. They clearly belong to a hunter. They’re like shooting some sharp tools back at me. Taking a nervous gulp, I suddenly caught my own air and made me have an unexpected cough. Brandon was shocked and immediately handed me the milkshake. I slowly drink it, accidently looking at the man behind him, who’s now smirking. I suddenly lose my grip on the drink and the milkshake accidentally fell unto my lap. My dress was damped as it continued to slide and scatter below our table. One of the waiters immediately handed me some assistance and tissue papers.

“I-I’m sorry.” I said, my voice was kind of soar.

“No. It’s okay.”

“I-I’m fine now.”

The people who tend to enjoy their meals just turned their attention to our table, specifically at me who is still coughing and catching some air. A couple of seconds after, I was able to recover myself from getting me into a complete choke. My hands began to shake as if they wanted my feet to run over the exit door and disappear. To my intent, I ate my lunch in a fast pace that even Brandon noticed it and was worried about me.

“Uhm, are you okay, Mellaine?”

“Y-yes. The food is really good. You should taste them too.” I said, keeping my eyes locked on my plate, which is now getting empty. I could still sense the man’s stare towards me. Barely keeping myself, I took a deep sigh and decided to excuse myself to the comfort room.

“Can I go to the comfort room?

“Sure.” Brandon said.

Slowly, I stood from my seat, holding the damped part of the dress, and headed to the comfort room with the guilt of having us in an eye-catching scenario. I went inside the comfort room, immediately and looked myself on the mirror. I was the only one. I washed my hands thoroughly and glanced over my fingers. The water is cold, rushing itself throughout them. I have it still, I remembered – that thing he gave me together with our vows that day. I don’t remember clearly the design of it – probably I was trying to erase it in my memory – but I half-remembered the ring, a diamond one, much-loved and especially cared off. The ring is still there in one of those jewellery boxes I have brought with me when I entered the town. Of course, I did swear that I won’t touch that thing any more. I don’t even like to see it or even put it on my finger. There are too many dark scenarios and broken promises with it, grasping themselves like germs around it. Having such a rule – I decided not to open that certain box with the other accessories inside it, yet I still can’t have myself in throwing that ring away. I grabbed some toilet papers, damped them with water enough for them to get wet and carefully wiped my dress where my drink was spilled. Somehow, I did manage to get some properly and was left with some little stains.

Thinking about the man behind Brandon, the circumstances were unexpected. Though, on the other day, I would have been prepared and alerted better when I already encountered such an almost the same scenario when Amy and I had our first shopping. But on that day, where a man walked towards my apartment, it was a total difference on what I did. I would have been way more vigilant if I didn’t lower my consciousness and live freely with no worries. But on that day – it was still alright, knowing I’m here and death didn’t still take me with him. I gave myself a sigh and decided to go back to our table, letting me see a lot of patience on Brandon’s face.

He saw me walking towards him and gently assisted me with the chair.

“Is everything okay now?”

“Yes. Thank you for the help.” I sweetly smiled. The man wasn’t there anymore. Just a single lady with her floral hat is sitting on the seat he took a while ago.

“No worries.” He added.

After some time, Brandon and I shared some usual conversations and was planning in having a camp with the others at the lake we visited last Valentines. We finished our lunch with our happy smiles and laughter. We decided to leave the mall and cross the road to go to the other side of the street where a bakeshop is selling some homemade bread is located.

The traffic light was red, enough for us to walk over the pedestrian lane. Brandon’s shoe lace wasn’t totally knotted, which made it loose itself. He leaned over, patiently making it to its place again. Other people started to walk across the street, while the timer is still on its 20s.

“Go ahead. I’ll meet you at the other side of the road.” He said and continued knotting it.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” He smiled with assurance and trust.

I walked across the lane, alone. The sun was shining so bright and it was getting hot. I looked straight on the other side of the road. The wind blew hard at me, as the timer took itself into eight seconds, making my hair swayed freely with it, when a sudden screech of wheels caught my sight and hearing. A stupidly merciless driver was driving his car recklessly towards my direction– showing his intent of having someone get killed with his own will. My heart pounced itself and it felt I was floating on air– I couldn’t feel my knees, even my feet. I felt numb all of a sudden and all I could do is stand still and wait for him to drag me along with his vehicle. I felt death slowly embraced his arms around me, together with the remaining seconds of time, patiently waiting to take me with him. An arm and a swift grip grabbed me and pulled me by his side, letting the driver drove off continually, sparing my life.

“Hey!” Brandon shouted to the person driving the car. But somehow, the driver didn’t bother to take his wheels on the side of the road and maybe ask some forgiveness and pardon on what he did on me. I felt my tears slowly formed at the side of my eyes. Brandon hugged me tight carefully, caressing me with his touch – the time I burst myself in crying. I don’t know how it happened – it was a rush, a total split of time. I slowly look around, people started to gather around us and I clearly saw death on one of them, carefully looking at my direction. I gently pushed Brandon from his hug. Keeping my head still at the ground, I said.

“I-I have to go…I-I’m sorry.”