Wake up hungover, either alone, living in a motel as a result of an impending divorce/trial separation (she kept the house), or next to a half-naked woman you’ve met/picked up/had s*x with in the previous six hours (most, if not all, of which you can’t remember).
When the beeper goes off a second time, hurl it against the opposite wall; this follows for both scenarios. If alone, throw up in the toilet/sink and stare at your reflection in the mirror. Don’t say anything. Instead, display a fed-up grimace, the kind which exemplifies I’m not angry, I’m just disappointed. Change into work attire.
I’m not angry, I’m just disappointedIf alone, do a shnort of vodka (a mini bottle) before heading to the unmarked patrol car. If said half-naked woman is still asleep, suggest she can let herself out
