He Called Me Princess. Disaster Engagement Series Book 3 Lynn Smith

Episode 15

I ran my hands across the lace and looked at my engagement ring, he said it was ‘a princess cut for his princess’ but I didn’t feel like a princess. Then the dressing room door opened when I looked up into the mirror to see how it was my heart nearly stoped beating, it was Michael. He stepped inside and closed the door and he looked shocked that I was wearing a dress he looked me up and down, he looked so hurt. It was quiet between us for a few seconds but it felt like an eternity. Then he said “what the f**k are you playing at sweetheart?” When I turned to face him he was angry “I told you not to get too serious with him what the f**k are you playing at?” and I couldn’t take anymore I put my head down. He came towards me and took my hand, “I’m not here to upset you sweetheart I was desperate to see you” I could hear the hurt in his voice “who told I was here?” “it was the big man, I didn’t want to show up at your house with Baldy there, and I don’t want to be here like this either, I just needed to see you. I don’t want to argue with you. I just wanted to tell you that I love you and that if your really happy with him then I will walk away but I think your making a huge mistake” why would the big man tell him I was here? I was going to kill him “Michael I’m sorry, I’m just so confused” I had tears in my eyes “come here sweetheart” and he cuddled me, it felt good to be in his arms. “I don’t think your right for him, I know he’s not right for you” he had said that same line about Stefan, and to be fair he was right about him. He gently stroked a tear off my cheek “I don’t mean to upset you” he said, I think he was shocked that I was capable of producing a tear “I was upset before you came in so don’t take it personally” I said with a laugh “why are you upset sweetheart?” He asked. I didn’t know where to start “Tommy isn’t happy with my Michael tattoo and he was being a bit cold towards me, he said I have to get rid of it” he smirked “have you ever asked yourself why you still have it after all these years? I bet it’s the same reason I have my Lydia tattoo, it’s because I still love you and I’m not ready to move on” he was right in a way, I had never properly moved on from him. “It wasn’t just the tattoo The big man said Tommy would be like this, that once he had me he wouldn’t want me” “don’t listen to the big man he says things to get into your head, I mean he’s been winding me up for weeks about you and baldy getting engaged, he’s wound me up so much that I’m crashing your wedding dress fitting. he has too much to say for someone that’s meant to be your friend” Tommy had said the same thing about the big man. Were they both right? But why would he want to cause any upset for me? He was one of my oldest friends “I know Tommy said he’s interfering, he told him that you two have some big night out planned, is that why your here in LA?” He gave me a confused look “what night out? I don’t know what your talking about, I came here to speak to you, I’m not defending baldy but be carful, you can’t always believe what the big man says” he held me close “it’s not the big mans fault I feel like this” he kissed my cheek “no it’s baldys fault your too good for him” I wish he would stop calling Tommy baldy it was so annoying. Then he looked into my eyes and said “I love you sweetheart” his eyes were full of hope but I couldn’t look at him, I just buried my face into his chest, “come with me, I’m staying in Texas, you don’t have to go through with all this. Come with me I can make you happy. If you were marrying me you wouldn’t be crying whilst trying on wedding dresses” but I wasn’t engaged to him because he had never asked me, he had never even asked me out for dinner since we split up all those years ago. He would just show up into my life out of the blue and turn everything upside down. I had to put a stop to this, I couldn’t handle him dipping in and out my life whenever he felt like it. It was like an emotional bomb going off every time he turned up. The excitement of seeing him was outweighed by the horrible feeling of abandonment when he left “I’m sorry Michael but we both need to move on, Even if it’s not with Tommy, if you and I were going to work out we would have made it work before now” he puffed up his chest and raised his voice “we can make it work, please don’t give up on us. I meant what I said in New York I’m only doing all this for you” I wasn’t buying his story that he was working hard on all these movies for me. If I meant anything to him he would move the world to be with me but instead he’s more interested in his career and fame, and none of that meant anything to me “I was with you when you were a struggling actor why do you think I need you to be rich and successful” he shuffled from one foot to the other “so that I can compete with Fran” what on earth was he talking about “he looks after you and he can give you anything you want. I just want to be at that level, I want to give you the life you deserve” “what has a Fran got to do with it?” I asked “he has everything to do with it. You pick him over every guy you’ve ever been with. He’s a bigger part of your life than you can admit” he was right I had just been comparing Tommy to Fran before he arrived. “We are like family Michael, it’s not like that with Fran” he let out a little laugh “I know that, you two are just mates, but he’s like an overbearing father to you, he casts a huge shadow over your life and you don’t even release” that was true if anyone told me not to do something I would never listen unless it was Fran. I took his word as gospel on everything in my life, he was the one person that I always turned to. He was my comfort blanket when we moved away from our family’s to London He was the only person I had trusted completely up until I found out we had s*x in Vegas. Michael softly stroked my face “you look beautiful sweetheart” he took my face in his hands “This is wrong you shouldn’t be here Michael” he tried to kiss me but I wouldn’t let him, I couldn’t give into him, I had to be strong “don’t turn away from me sweetheart your breaking my heart” “you need to leave Michael, this has been going on for too long, we need to stop all this” “I can’t turn off my feelings for you, and I know you don’t love Baldy as much as you love me. I know he couldn’t possibly love you the way I do” “this isn’t about Tommy it’s about us hanging onto the past, we both need to move on. I’m not saying Tommy and I are going to be together, all I’m saying is as long as I have you at the back of my mind I won’t move on with anyone, and I can’t live like that anymore” “so your saying thats it for us, that I will never have a chance with you” I had to tell him that I had to move on “yes Michael I’m sorry but this thing between us has to stop” “you might have given up on me but I will never give up on you, I love you” “please Michael, this is for your own good, you deserve to be happy with someone else” “fine..ok I hear what your saying I won’t bother you again. But I mean what I say about baldy. He isn’t the right person for you” “you might be right, I will always love you Michael but I can’t live like this anymore, I can’t hope that your going to decide to turn up when it suits you” “I love you too sweetheart” he kissed me on the lips and it was soft and loving and I wanted to run away with him I wanted to shout ‘let’s do this’ but I swallowed my feelings as always and put on a fake smile. He stood back and said “your going to be a beautiful bride sweetheart. Your going to make someone very happy one day” “I’m sorry if you think I’m being heartless here but every time I look at you it hurts and it’s not right. I need to move on” he nodded and left without another word and when he left and I was devastated but it had to be done, now I just had to speak to Tommy but I didn’t have the strength to dump the two of them in one day. Tommy could wait till tomorrow. That night I went home and i went straight to bed. I had no missed calls from Tommy none of his usual soppy text messages and although I was hurt I took that as the final straw that we were done. I fell asleep cuddling into my pillow and because I was alone I allowed myself to cry. How could I have been so stupid to have been sucked in by him. I was sleeping when I felt someone lay beside me. I woke up with a fright and I felt Tommy snuggle into me. “Sorry if I woke you Princess I had to drive down tonight I can’t sleep without you” I turned my head to look at him. He looked tired and he kissed me on the lips “What time is it?” I asked “it’s 2.00am, I’m sorry I didn’t get a chance to call you today I forgot my charger. And it was non stop at work. Go back to sleep princess” he kissed my neck and I was totally relaxed, I could feel his strong arms surround me and I felt safe. how could I have been so stupid to think he wanted to end things with me over one stupid argument. I needed my head looked at I thought to myself I turned my whole body towards him and he grabbed me into a big bear hug “I’ve missed you so much today, let’s never spend a night apart my heart couldn’t take it” he said with a little smile “you were the one that wanted to stay in a hotel” I didn’t want to it’s just I’m so tired with all the driving and this film is doing me in. It’s exhausting, I’m sorry about yesterday.” “Why is the film doing you in?” “the director is a dickhead and keeps changing things at the last minute, we had a meeting first thing this morning and he said we are going to be filming for a bit longer because it has run over already, and I hate all the other actors they’re stuck up wankers” “why didn’t you tell me all this?” “I didn’t want to worry you, anyway how did you get on today with the wedding dresses?” “It was s**t I spent the whole day miserable that you didn’t want to be with me any more” “what? why would you think that?” “Because of yesterday the way you were acting. And saying you were staying in a hotel tonight then I didn’t hear from you all day” “I’m sorry I was like that yesterday I know you hate it when I’m jealous. I was just stressed out with work And I’m sorry if I ruined your day” “it’s ok I feel better now your back. Why don’t I come through to the city and we can stay in a hotel together for a while, you must be shattered with all this driving” “I didn’t want to ask you to do that but it would make it a lot easier” “great and we can come home on your days off, what time are you leaving for work tomorrow I will come with you” “in about three hours” “oh Tommy you drove all this way and you need to leave so soon you get some sleep baby, I’ll pack a bag in the morning” “I love you princess” I could feel him drifting off and I felt so guilty for over reacting, he did love me and that was all that mattered.

For the next two months Tommy and I stayed in the city during the days he was filming and went home to the house on his days off. It was nice to be away from everybody because I had a bit of a falling out with the big man before we left for the city. I told him I wasn’t happy with him winding up Tommy about some night out with Michael and that Michael had turned up at my dress fitting. I asked him why he told him where I was, he just said that Michael was his friend and wanted to see me, and that he didn’t see the harm in it. I wanted to throttle him. I knew him so well and I thought he would never do anything to hurt me but for the past few months I was starting to suspect that there was something going on with him, I was always catching him out with silly lies and I was sick of it. The break away from him was doing me the world of good. Tommy was so much happier too. He had a lot more energy, because he didn’t need to commute every day. The director from his film was fired and a new up and coming young guy took over. Tommy said it was a lot better on set and he was beginning to enjoy his work again. I loved living in the hotel, I could order room service day or night and it was nice to be in the centre of a city again because I was beginning to miss the hustle and bustle of London. The hotel was lovely and I was only a two hour drive from home so I could pop back to see Carmela Chris Fran and Stacey whenever I wanted. I started looking at wedding venues online. Tommy said he would like us to get married in LA but I wanted it to be in Scotland. So the wedding plans had kind of stoped until we could decide. But we were happy. I decided to go home to the house one afternoon to help Fran with the album I had kind of finished it and he wanted to discuss it with me. Vinnie and Harry were both staying at the hotel too, they were staying in the suites across from us and they seemed to be enjoying it. They both became friends with Tommy. As I was going home to see Fran, Vinnie and Harry were both with me. We stepped into the elevator to head down to the car. I had my dark shades on to cover my face. When we got into the elevator I noticed that there was three really tall men in suits already in there. Vinnie stepped in first and held the door for me. Then I stepped in, I didn’t look up at the guys I just stood with my back to them. I had my head phones in and I was humming along to a David Bowie song as the doors closed. Harry looked at me and laughed “your singing louder than you think Miss knight ” he said, I could feel myself going red, I was so embarrassed that I was singing in public, even though I sang in front of thousands of people at our gigs. Vinnie started to sing along with me because I think he knew I was embarrassed “you’re a good singer Vinnie” I said and I could hear the men behind us arguing but I just ignored them. Then I heard one of them saying “please dad don’t try to speak to her you’re embarrassing us” and I was surprised to hear that he had a Scottish accent. I turned to look at them. The three of them were well over six foot tall and they were wearing suits. The two younger men had jet black hair. the older gentleman stood in the middle of them, his face dropped when I looked at him. He was in his early fifties with thick grey hair and was possibly the most handsome man I had ever seen in my life. He looked like superman with his chiselled good looks and crystal blue eyes. We were just staring at each other then he finally said “are you Lydia Knight? I absolutely love you... I mean I love your band” he looked excited to see me and it gave me a thrill “thanks, are you from Scotland” I asked “aye hen Glasgow” i could tell he was from the east end just like me, and he had obviously very successful because he was wearing a beautifully tailored suit and a ridiculously expensive watch. “it’s nice to hear a Scottish voice” i said “I’m John, this is my sons Junior and Jordon” He reached his hand out for a handshake which I thought was very formal. I let out a little giggle as he shook my hand, and with my other hand I took off my sunglasses and his face broke into a huge grin “your absolutely beautiful” he said studying my face, then the younger man said “dad shut up” I could tell he was really beginning to get annoyed with his dad, which I found funny. John just ignored him and kept his eyes on me “when’s your next album coming out?” He asked “I’m just going to my house to meet Fran to work on it, so hopefully next year” he was staring at my mouth as I spoke and I was starting to get a little hot and bothered, he turned to his son Junior, “did you hear that she’s going to meet Fran....Fran Kavangh, don’t get me wrong i love you, I think your great but he is one cool guy. I think I would burst out crying if I met him” I let out a laugh, the thought of this huge man crying with excitement had me tickled. The elevator stoped and we all got out at the ground floor basement car park. As we walked towards our cars John said “I hope you do another tour, I had tickets to see you in Rome but it got cancelled because of a bomb threat i was gutted” that was the night I’d got too drunk to go on stage and Fran cancelled the gig because I had got engaged to Stefan “I’m sorry about that” i said and I put my head down in embarrassment “it’s not your fault” he said “he’s seen you guys loads of times” said his oldest son “yeah we have an office in Chicago I seen you there last year, you were amazing. I can’t believe I’m meeting you, I heard your engaged to that actor guy, how did he get a girl like you, he’s punching above his weight” he said with a cheeky grin. I let out a laugh, he was funny and straight to the point and I liked him. Just then my phone started to ring “oh it’s Fran I better get it, you should say hello to him” he looked terrified “oh my god Fran kavangh” I put it on loud speaker “hello Francis” I said, Frans voice rang through the phone “alright gorgeous” “I’ve just met your number one fan and he wants to say hello” I looked at John and he actually looked pale all of a sudden. “eh hi who’s this” asked Fran in a friendly tone. John swallowed and said “alright son my name is Sir John Steel and I’m a huge fan of your band, I just bought one of your guitars at an auction in Chicago, cost me an arm and a leg but it was worth it” “oh that one for charity. That raised alot of money thanks very much mate” said Fran, John was ecstatic “not at all son, i absolutely love your Music I used to listen to your song ‘strong’ from your second album over and over when my daughter passed away. In fact it’s my ring tone” I looked at his face and he wasn’t as cocky as he was before, he looked sad but I could tell he was genuinely star struck that he was speaking to Fran. “that means a lot mate I’m glad you like it, it was actually Lydia that wrote that one” John looked at me with a big smile “well it got me through some hard times” I was touched that it had helped him. Then John said “I was just speaking to Lydia about your new album I can’t wait to hear it” “yeah it’s going to be a good one” said Fran but he didn’t sound convincing, I wondered what was wrong with him “nice one son it was nice talking to you” before Fran put the phone down I said “I’ll be home in about 2 hours honey” John was smiling like a Cheshire Cat “see you soon gorgeous” said Fran and ended the call before I could say goodbye, he was always doing that and it drove me nuts “I can’t believe I just spoke to Fran Kavangh, does he always call you gorgeous?” He asked “It’s just a nickname, Chris and the Big Man call me that too” “I can see why they call you gorgeous you’re Stunning” Johns son Junior stood forward “dad come on you’re embarrassing us” but he just ignored him “are you staying at the hotel John?” I asked “please call me Sir Steel I prefer it” he said with a very serious look on his face and my smiled slipped away. I didn’t want to offend him. His son Junior said “he’s only joking” I looked at John and he was smiling, he was such a wind up “Sir Steel, I like it. I would love to be Lady Knight” “if you marry me you could be Lady Steel” “oh but I’m already engaged, damn” I joked “give him the elbow” he said with a wink. I just shook my head then he said “you’re lovely, I’ve met loads of famous people but they are usually stuck up. I can’t wait to tell my youngest son I met you he will be raging he missed you” “oh that’s a shame does he like the band too” no he just fancies you, he used to have posters up on his wall when he still stayed at home“ I let out a giggle “oh right, why would anyone have a poster of me on their wall?” I asked Johns car pulled up beside us and his son Jordon said “dad we better go we’re going to be late for the meeting” but he wouldn’t take his eyes off me when he spoke to them “yeah alright son, they will understand, I’m meeting Lydia Knight they can wait, any chance I could get a photo of us together my son jack won’t believe me” I shrugged my shoulders “yeah of course, but I look a mess” he shook his head “you look beautiful” he held me tight as we posed for the photo, he smelled expensive and I let out a little giggle at his strong grip. “Sorry darling I hope I’m not hurting you” Vinnie and Harry stood to one side, they both didn’t take their eyes off John. His son Jordon shook his head and took the photo “thanks for that Lydia you must think I’m a mad fan I just love you guys” “not at all, it was nice to meet you Sir Steel” “you’ve made my day, actually you’ve made my year, honestly if I was 20 years younger I would give that wee boyfriend of yours a run for his money, anyway thanks for the photo darling” “bye Sir Steel, bye guys” I waved to his sons and as I walked away I could hear his oldest son Junior saying “for god sake dad, that was embarrassing” then I heard John say “shut up, she must have people stoping her all the time, she’s a lovely girl. your brother is going to flip when he sees this” I liked meeting real fans, it was a refreshing change to all the people that were only interested in what dress I was wearing or asking about my wedding plans, and the fact that he said one of my songs had helped him at a difficult time in his life made me think that me and the boys were actually doing something worthwhile and that our music could touch someone like that, it made me feel proud, and I couldn’t wait to get home and sit down with Fran and work on our next album.