The Future of the Broken Generation

Chapter one

** Hayley**

It’s strange how things in life can change in an instant. For me, it was the day I reconnected with Kevin. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to share my story with you. He saved my life more times than I would care to admit. But deep down, even back then, even I should have known, that my mother was out to ruin everything. this story truly begins in septemeber….

***

***September***

“Come on” Hayley shouted impatiently, up the stairs before she reached down to get her bag.

“I’m coming”

“well hurry faster, the bus will be here in fifteen minutes and we still need to get out of the house. We’re the last ones to leave, yet again”

Hayley turned to her sisters, Zoey and Naomi who stood by the door ready to leave “got your P.E kit and your homework?”

“Yes,” they both echoed.

Hayley stopped before rushing them out the door, finding her purse, she handed over a ten-pound note to Zoey “give this to your teacher, please. tell him, I will give the rest tomorrow as I don’t have it on me now. it's for your trip next week so, please don’t lose it.  have a good day, I love you both and I'll see you tonight”

“love you Hayley” they both echoed as they walked out the door to a taxi waiting for them outside

A door slammed before Laura came running down the stairs out of breath. Throwing her shoes on, she ran through the open door “I’m sorry, I know we’re going to be late. I nearly forgot my file again. Now, come on Hayley, we really need to go or you’re driving to school today” she said in a rush as she ran out.

Hayley sighed. the typical morning rush. She turned to her childminder who was stood holding Lily.

“thank you again, ill see you later, okay Lily? I love you and be a good girl for me” Hayley bent over to give her youngest sister a kiss goodbye

“bye, bye” Lily replied waving her hand at Hayley.

They arrived just in time as the bus turned up, the bright September sun blinded Hayley as she climbed on. She walked halfway down and found a seat in the middle. Before sitting down, Hayley grabbed her earphones out of her bag and threw her bag on the seat beside her.

Hayley watched as the bus drove on to the next stop. Staring out into the cold-looking countryside, she wished she could be at home. As the bus pulled into the next stop, not looking at what she was doing, Hayley pulled one of her earphones out, as a loud bang came on the right-hand side of the bus followed by a group of lads laughing before climbing on.

“great I hate the mornings on this bus,” Hayley told herself.

As the group leader walked down the aisle, he looked at Hayley for a brief second before continuing to go to the back. Claiming the middle seat, his friends behind him fought over who was to sit next to him and the other alone. Before Hayley could turn her head back around to plug her earphones in, the bus driver had already come charging down the aisle.

“Kevin, I don’t know how many times I have had to tell you not to mess about before and after you get on the bus.” He said to the group leader he turned to Kevin’s friends “I’m pretty sure you are setting an example for the younger children on this bus, I will be having a word with your headmaster again if you don’t change the way you behave. you have only been at school two weeks, I suggest you buck your ideas up before next week” he turned around and half walked, and half ran down the aisle to start the bus again in a rush.

Hayley sighed and put her earphone back in, as she knew the next bit; before the bus had even pulled off, Kevin and his friends were messing about again.

Seeing the bus pull into the school ground, Hayley stood up first and waited impatiently to be let off. As she climbed off, she looked around for her friend to arrive.

“come on Tanya, where are you?” she thought to herself. A small tap came on Hayley’s shoulder after a minute. Turning around, Hayley tugged her earphones out to see Tanya standing behind her out of breath with her cheeks flushed.

“Hey how are you this morning? How was your little brother last night?” Hayley asked, putting her phone away in her bag.

“ugh don’t even get me started. Same usual routine, I look after the little monster and he tries to destroy my life completely by existing” Tanya replied.

Hayley smiled. Every Wednesday without fail, Tanya told her stories of how her 6-year-old brother misbehaved for her while her mum worked the night shift.

“and you think you have it hard?” Hayley asked sarcastically as they started to walk.

“Yeah but you have it easy, your sisters respect you….” Tanya’s reply was cut short

Behind them, Kevin was running fast and was shoved by one of his friends into Hayley nearly knocking her over. He quickly grabbed her hand stopping her from falling and waited until she had got her footing back before he let go.

“I am so sorry; I didn’t mean to knock into you. Callum pushed me and I was going too fast, I couldn’t stop. are you okay Hayley?”

Hayley blinked in confusion. She nodded and looked down. Seeing her bag wide open with all her stuff on the floor, she sighed. Kevin quickly bent down and passed it back to her. While Hayley stood, still shocked she even got an apology as she knew, for most people to even get an apology from Kevin, was a miracle.

“I’m fine thank you Kevin, honestly don’t worry about it” Hayley said quietly, quickly smiling she added “thank you” before holding her bag up. The wind blew her hair into her face slightly as she began to turn around to start walking again.

Kevin nodded before running to catch up to his friends who were ahead of him, laughing.

“oh my god, he actually spoke to you” Tanya gushed at Hayley coming up behind her “how long has it been since you two spoke?”

Hayley shrugged her shoulders. Quickly stuffing her belongings back in her bag, she started her walk again towards the school doors “I don’t know” in her head she added almost, two and half years

By the time they had reached the doors, Tanya had found something else to moan about. Hayley nodded her head every now and again to show, she was listening. Her hand kept falling to the place where Kevin had knocked into her, she gently massaged it hoping the pain would go away soon. Coming to the end of the corridor, Tanya continued to turn left. The large wide windows were allowing the sun to shine through, blinding herself Hayley stopped and turned to her friend, her fierce blue eyes shone when the sun reflected on them “Tanya unless you want to be late for the common room, we need to go right”

Tanya laughed “I was talking too much, again wasn’t I? you know what I’m like, once I start, I won't shut up”

Hayley giggled and grabbed her friend's shoulders, gently shaking her “oh I know, I’ve had to put up with it for the last two years” she joked as they walked on

The bell rang and all the other students piled in the large science room where Hayley had registration. Sitting in the corner at the back of the room, Hayley sat with the rest of her friends Rosie and Charlotte.

The teacher walked in and started the computer to start taking registration. As she asked the room to quieten down; Hayley who had her back turned to the door, jumped when it burst open as Kevin, flying into the room. When he realised, he was late again, he froze and turned to his teacher “sorry I tripped” he watched as the rest of the students tried to hide the laughs.

The teacher stood up from the computer and walked towards Kevin, pointing for him to go outside the classroom. The room fell silent again while everyone tried to listen in to the conversation. as soon as they realised, they weren’t hearing anything they all started talking at once.

Charlotte turned and faced everyone and started to go on about an amazing party she had been to over the weekend. While they were lost in their world, Hayley tuned out. It wasn’t that she wasn’t interested in what happened the truth is she was jealous. Ever since her dad had died two years ago, she had found it hard to look after her seven younger sisters, pay the bills and afford their basics, while her mum worked away. But in Hayley’s eyes she knew she wanted more in life than be a carer for the rest of her life. Her youngest sister, Lily was 2 and as much as she loved her, she didn’t want to spend the rest of her life looking after her. She hated how her mum had dumped the kids on herself and Hayley knew she wouldn’t be able to stand herself if they all grew up and were separated. along with dealing with the loss of her father, she hated how she had to be the one who had comfort the younger girls when she told them that her mum wasn’t coming to see them and most of all she hated how she had to be the one to grow up and take on more responsibility than she was ready for. Deep down she knew why Kevin looked at her every day on the bus, She has known him her entire life and they used to be close friends before her father died. She hated how everyone knew her as the “freak” who looked after her sisters and she hated the way her friends go on knowing she couldn’t do half the stuff they do. She knew that when her dad died, she blocked everyone out, Kevin included. She always kept her thoughts to herself. “I’m fine” was her favorite quote, whilst on the inside, she knew she was lying to everyone around her. She was sick of all the teachers pitying in her, and constantly asking how she was doing. She felt safer keeping all her thoughts to herself, rather than let everyone else know her problems.

Mrs Hamilton came back in and started the register just before the bell went for the first lesson. Behind her, Kevin followed and sat quietly in the front of the room without saying a word. When the bell had rung again, as Hayley was gathering her things together, she was asked the stay behind

As the last student left the room, Hayley walked over to her teachers’ desk. Mrs Hamilton looked up at her “are you okay?” she asked. Hayley nodded and went towards the door she was about to leave before she said “I’m fine thank you Mrs Hamilton. you don’t have to worry about me, I’m always fine”

Running down the hallway, Hayley ran toward the catering room where she would spend the next six hours. The school was due  to have a bake sale the next day in aid of a charity. As she walked in, she dumped her stuff in the small cupboard at the back of the room and grabbed an apron and began on her cakes. Along with one other student and four staff members, Hayley was stuck in the room for the rest of the day. she started to gather everything she needed.

“right listen up please, as you are all aware of the bake sale that’s going on tomorrow I would like you all to get on with your coursework while I start everyone off” Miss Shaw walked in, calmly announcing. Hayley waited until she was finished so she could plug in her music and waited for her break to come. 

A slim, tall girl with medium length black straight hair and dull green eyes entered the room. dropping her bag off at the nearest table she could find, she walked over to Miss Shaw holding out file that Hayley guessed was her coursework.

Emma Nelson. Hayley mentally had a breakdown. For the last year she went out of her way to make Hayley’s life a daily misery inside the school. she and Emma used to be friends before her dad died. She never liked the fact Kevin used to speak more to Hayley than he would to her. Everyone in the school knew Emma always tried her hardest to get Kevin’s attention. It never worked.

Using the cupboard underneath her workstation, Hayley grabbed a bowl and cake tins. Turning around to a cutlery stand behind her, Hayley grabbed a spoon, spatula and a knife. As she turned around Emma stood behind her, making her fall on the floor dropping everything.

An earphone fell out as Hayley glared up at Emma. standing up quickly bright red in the face, she picked everything off the floor, ignoring the burning pain in her left hip.

“oops, watch where you’re going next time” Emma smiled evilly and walked away.

At the sink where she was washing the spatula Hayley put her earphone back today's going to long, she thought just for once, let her leave me alone.

Some while later, while her third cake was in the oven the bell rang to signal it was time for the first break. while she watched everyone else walk out the room, Hayley stayed behind and carried on putting the next mixture into cakes tins ready to go in the oven.

Someone tapped Hayley on the shoulder. Unplugging her earphone Hayley turned to see Miss Shaw standing behind her.

“it has five more minutes left before it’s out the oven, then one is ready to go in and is out 10 minutes after I come back” Hayley explained before Miss Shaw could ask her why she had stayed behind as she did, she pointed at the cake mixture in the tin already waiting to go in the oven.

“don’t worry, I’ll get them out for you.  go on Hayley, go get some fresh air, it is getting very hot in here”

“only if you are sure?” Hayley replied “thank you. can I leave my stuff here? I don’t need it with me” she added as she took off her apron.

Miss Shaw nodded and looked at the clock on the wall.

The sun blinded Hayley, as she walked outside the wind blew a cool breeze. Finding Charlotte was easy. Surrounded by a group of teenaged smokers, she was talking Matt and Callum. Slowly walking up to them Hayley, she asked Charlotte if she had seen her other friends

“no, I’m sorry” she replied looking up at her, she then diverted her attention back to the boys

Matt swapped side with Callum, looking at Hayley “hi” he said

“hi” she replied. there was a silence

“so, Hayley tell us, how your weekend with your sisters?” Matt tried to break the silence. His goofy smile lit his brown eyes up as he spoke. Quickly glancing at Charlotte, she saw her inhale deeply in excitement.

Diverting her attention back to Matt, she quickly answered sarcastically “you know the usual, helping younger ones with homework whilst trying to catch up with coursework with a very clingy two-year-old at my feet screaming because she refused to not go for a nap, the usual fun. what about you? what did you do?”

Matts eyes nearly popped out his head holding his hands up, he answered “remind me never to have kids when I’m older. I never knew you had a kid. how old is she?”

Charlotte snorted “Matt, she doesn’t have a kid, it’s her sister remember?”

“I know, I just like winding her up”

Hayley rolled her eyes before quickly checking her phone for the time; she saw she had five minutes left. Putting her phone away, she turned to Charlotte “I’m going to head inside, still got to do the cakes and all that so I don’t know what time I’ll be finished. What you are doing tonight after school, fancy coming over for a bit?”

“yeah, my mums at work and I don’t really fancy being in the house with my brother and his girlfriend what times best for you?”

“any time after 7.30 is fine. as soon as I have Lily down, I'll text you. you know how she gets when there someone new at her house. She gets all excited and then won't sleep properly, which will mean I’ll get no sleep tonight”

Charlotte giggled when Hayley mentioned Lily “I love that little girl she’s too cute, yh that’s fine. I’ll give you a text and see how you’re doing with the bake sale”

Hayley nodded “yeah, that’s fine” she turned to head down the stairs.

Kevin came around the corner and met Hayley on the bottom step “sorry, you go first” he stepped out her way.

“thanks”

Kevin paused after Hayley started to turn around the corner ignoring his friends, he ran to catch with her. Seeing he startled her, he quickly said “sorry I didn’t mean to startle you. I just wanted to say I'm sorry again for this morning. I teased callum again about him and his girlfriend and when he pushed me, I couldn’t stop. Are you okay? I saw you wince when I pushed you, I didn’t hurt you did I?”

Rather shocked, Hayley replied, “I’m fine don’t worry. just wasn’t what I expected first thing when I came into school this morning.”

Breathing a sigh of relief, Kevin nodded at Hayley. Hayley was about to start walking again when Kevin started speaking again

“okay I just wanted to check that’s all. I was wondering, are you free for five minutes after school today? Id like to talk to you about something, it’s nothing serious and I won’t take much of your time up, I promise.” He flashed a cheeky smile after he spoke and looked at her

Rather stunned that even Kevin had even spoken to her after the last year, Hayley tried to scramble her thoughts together. While Kevin was busy talking away to her, she had seen that Emma had come out of the door and was heading their way. Suddenly Kevin stopped talking and was looking at her, waiting for an answer from his previous question.

“I’m sorry Kevin, maybe I don’t really know. it’s just, I’m doing baking for the cake sale tomorrow so I’m in the catering room all day, it’s a really busy day for me. if I can, I’ll try and find you after school. I don’t mean to sound rude, I just don’t know what time I'm going to be finished, that’s all”

Kevin nodded understanding “okay I’ll let you get on then”

After a quick smile, Hayley walked on.

“Hey Kevin, wait for me” Emma called, as she rushed by Hayley giving her a glare. used to ignoring everything Emma did, Hayley continued walking on slower than normal. behind her, she heard the following conversation.

“you feeling alright? Normally I hear reports of you being sent to the head in the mornings” Emma joked

“yeah I’m fine, was just a talk this morning. I have to report to the school office every day for a month or I get detention, it’s a new thing the school has come up with to try and get me to behave a little more. if I don’t, I’ll get expelled so I’m on good behavior from now on, I need to pass this year”

“oh okay” Emma giggled

“Hey Emma, you missed it. Kevin asked that Hayley girl on a date after school, she declined” Matt shouted to embarrass Kevin.

Hayley’s cheeks flushed bright red as she heard Emma snort “err why? Of all the girls in the school, you ask that thing out. Don’t know about you guys but she’s a freak, I would never look after my brother if it was up to me, I like drinking too much”

Again, Hayley heard Emma giggle and then stop when Kevin replied with a rhetorical question in a dull tone.

“I went to say sorry to her because I knocked in her this morning, I never got a chance to before. she wasn’t interested, so it’s a good thing she said no then isn’t it?”

By this point, Hayley had reached the door to go back inside before she turned to go in, she took a quick glance at Kevin and Emma before she walked through the door. Kevin was standing on the bottom step above Emma with a cigarette in his hand, looking down at her. behind him, Matt and Callum were messing about fighting and Charlotte was smirking and looking through the glass panel at Hayley, she motioned her thumbs as if they were texting her. Lastly, she took a quick glance at Emma who stood with a smug smirk on her face beaming up at Kevin.

Hearing the door slam behind her, Hayley continued the five minute walk to the catering room on the other side of the long corridor. She was about to enter the catering room door when her phone beeped in her pocket and a text had come from Charlotte

I’ve NEVER seen Kevin stand up for anyone before I thought he would have said something, but he didn’t. Emma’s enjoying the whole thing. She just launched in the lecture about how she loves him, and they should get back together, etc. He turned her down and said he needs to go inside and get a drink. i think he’s mad at Matt as he looked like he was saying something to him. but ill text you later chick, I’ll see you tonight have fun baking xx

Hayley smiled at her phone before putting it away. she washed her hands the bell went and Miss Shaw was behind Hayley.

“We don’t have the year 7 normal class as they have been pulled into the art room to make posters. I arranged it so it was just those who are helping with the bake sale. I’m going to set the student and other teachers off with icing them, are you okay to continue making them, please? we should be done after lunch as we are getting some donated as well so that should make up for the ones we don’t have a chance to bake today. it’s going to be quite hot today and after lunch, it will be tidying up, cleaning, etc. we will have an early finish, hopefully,”

Hayley nodded and plugged her earphones in again while she was making her mixture, her thoughts drifted to Kevin. Seeing him like that made her feel very unsure and nervous about their conversation, in her eyes if he truly cared for her feelings then he would have said something to Emma when he had the chance. A million questions popped into Hayley’s head. Why is it now he’s decided to speak to me?  What does he want to speak about if I meet him? Should I even go and speak to him? what if it’s a setup?  Eventually, Hayley calmed herself down. After having a hundred conversations with herself she was sick of hearing her own voice. Whilst having a fight with herself, she had decided that now wasn’t the time for her to be messing thinking about boys and their games. For the last year, she had put her sister’s needs first making sure they had everything they needed. She wasn’t going to start doing that now.

***Hayley's pov***

A while later, i was busy washing up, not realising the bell had already rung for the third lesson fifty-five minutes ago. I saw Miss Shaw walk in the room, out the corner of my eye and start speaking to me. Drying my hands quickly, I stopped my music and pulled my earphones out.

“I’m sorry Miss Shaw, I didn’t realise you wanted my attention, what were you saying?” I quickly interrupt her before she was finished.

“sorry Hayley, I forgot you liked your music. I was just saying there is going to be a delivery within the next five minutes. it's for the cake sale tomorrow. can you do me a favour, would you direct them to put the boxes the small counter bit?” Miss Shaw pointed to two small counters of the opposite side of the catering room.

i nod and reply “that’s fine”

“I’m just going to the art room and see what the posters are like. Mr Davis just caught me in the hall and just said how good some of them are, he’s one very proud teacher. Anyways, are we have about 5-10 minutes until lunch, why don’t you sit down for a rest? you’ve worked hard today”

I nod my head again, and this time add a smile on my face. I hate my smile, I look like a strangled cat when I do. I tell myself to shut up as I watched Miss Shaw walk out the room and instead of doing what she had suggested I begin the horrible task of drying the utensils away. in the stand behind me for one simple reason. If Miss Shaw had said we’re getting cakes donated, then an early finish for me meant spending some time in the library to try and get some coursework done. I love Lily but how I wish she would leave me alone for an hour when I'm at home, so I get at least one bit finished and checked before October. I finish drying and putting away everything and my next job is to check my cake list. I ignore the bell, which had just rung to signal it was time for lunch and I stand and watch the other student and teachers rush out the door, for the first time today I'm left alone. I like being alone, at least no one tries to speak to me or puts me down. Walking over to my work station I start going down my list as an overwhelming sickness and dizzy feeling suddenly hit me, followed by intense stomach pains. i double over and lower myself to the ground, praying the pain would go away very soon. After calming myself down, I straightened myself up and focus on what i needed to do to get that early finish. I started going to the list and soon realised I had missed one off. I sigh and started cursing myself for being such a dumb arse. I look in the cupboard beneath me and pull out a mixing bowl and weighing scales before running to get the rest of the utensils and ingredients I need. Within five minutes, I have it all made up and ready to go in the oven. I walk around the catering room trying to find an oven that wasn’t being used. I spot one out the corner of my eye where all the boxes are sat. typical, I hate using gas cookers. I walk over and start moving some of the boxes out my way so I could open the door. I was about to put my cake in the oven when I realised, I need it to warm up or my cake wouldn’t rise, and I must start all over again.

Leaning over the gas cooker, I flick the switch on for the gas. Leaning back, I turn the dial. I watched in slow motion as the flames begin to light up the ring and continue coming my way. my feet were lifted off the ground with a force so hard I was knocked breathless as I hit the wall behind me. my eyes are wide open, and I can already feel and see the flames coming towards me. I hear I loud scream, and it was only as I landed on top of the boxes, beneath me, that I realise it was me screaming. I land on top of the boxes, squashing them and smash my head on the cold, hard ground beneath them as a loud bang came from around me, followed by the windows smashing. My ears are ringing, like they do in the movies and my vision is very blurred. My body aches all over, and I couldn’t move. After a few moments, I drag myself out of further away from the small corner and kneel to try and stand up. I see some students run out of the bottom corridor and I scream again to try and get their attention. They don’t hear me. I try and stand up, but my legs give way and Im back to being stuck on the floor again. The ringing sound in my ears had quietened down, a little and I can hear screams and shouting come from the main hall above me. That sound soon falls quiet after a few minuets. I move my legs again and this time I almost scream at the pain all down my sides. I start coughing and the pain gets worse, the last thing I remember is reaching out my hand, hoping someone might see im still in here before something falls on top of me. everything fades to black and the last thing on my mind is myself asking me a question…

Why doesn’t anybody care for me?