INVISIBLE
344 Words
I think I've finally disappeared.
Not completely.
Just enough.
People don't call my name anymore.
Not in class.
Not in the hallway.
It's like they've adjusted to my silence.
Like I was never meant to be loud in the first place.
I walk past groups of people every day.
They laugh.
They talk.
And I pass through them like I'm not even there.
It doesn't bother me.
At least... I don't think it does.
Being invisible has its advantages.
No expectations.
No pressure.
No disappointment.
But invisibility isn't perfect.
There's always an exception.
Her.
She still sees me.
Even when I pretend not to be seen.
She dragged a chair next to mine again today.
Same as always.
Like it's her assigned seat.
"You can't keep doing this," she said.
I didn't ask what she meant.
I already knew.
"This whole quiet thing... it's not you."
Not me.
I almost asked her what she thinks "me" is.
But I didn't.
"You don't talk. You don't laugh. You don't even react anymore," she continued.
I looked at her.
Calm.
Still.
"I'm fine," I said.
She shook her head.
"You always say that."
There was a pause.
A long one.
Then she did something strange.
She smiled.
Not a big smile.
Just small.
Soft.
"Even if you push everyone away... I'm not going anywhere."
I didn't respond.
Not because I didn't hear her.
But because I didn't know what to do with that.
People don't say things like that.
Not seriously.
I've learned that most promises are temporary.
They sound real in the moment.
But they don't last.
Still...
She keeps showing up.
Every day.
Talking.
Sitting next to me.
Acting like I haven't already disappeared.
I don't understand her.
And I don't know if I should.
Because understanding leads to attachment.
And attachment leads to loss.
But today...
For a brief moment-
I almost said something back.
I didn't.
But I thought about it.
That's new.
Maybe she hasn't given up on me.
Or maybe...
She just hasn't realized yet-
That I'm already gone.
- Writer
