I lay in bed next to Nikolai, wrapped up in a robe right after a warm shower that we had both shared. He was asleep as he had been complaining of a headache, but I stayed awake, just staring off at the ceiling, my mind all jumbled up. The answers I was searching for were not written on the walls or the ceilings, and I hated just how alone I was in the end.
In the end, I would need to sort it out on my own. In the end, I would need to believe my own mind and hope it was true.
I slowly got out of bed and walked to the bathroom. It felt like a ghost of what it was when Nikolai and I had been here just hours ago, and I wondered if that was how everything would feel when he left. If he leaves.
The thought of Jim leaving seemed to nag at the back of my mind now, even though it never did befor
