Why couldn't you just hate me?

The Gaze

The days went on, none of them looked at, or , towards eachother. Jacob went on usual at his day, going to classes, doing homework, quiddich, and hanging out with friends. Sebastian however had something else going on. Usually when Jacob pisses him off he just brushes it off, doesn't think about it and sometimes even forgets it, but this time there was something else. Darling. The word echoed in his mind, the way Jacob said it, so smooth, so calm. It bothered him, and made his chest ache. He shrugged it off as just being angry or annoyed, but underneath all those walls was something else hiding...

Its lunchtime at Hogwarts, Sebastian is walking into the dinning hall with Ominis. He immediately spots Jacob, who's sitting at the gryffindor table togherther with Garreth. He notices them chatting, laughing and enjoying their lunch. Usually he did have a distaste for Garreth, but only because hes Jacobs friend, and a Gryffindor, but today there was a rather more bitter taste in his mouth when he saw them sitting together. He sat down with Ominis and started putting food on hispplate, closely following what Jacob and Garreth were doing. He picks at his food, barley tasting it. He tries to look away, to look at his food, but he just cant seem to brake the focus away from Garreth and Jacob. He sees Jacob laughing, leaning in,confortable. Too confortable. And Garreth, the fiery haired, obnoxiously loud Garreth, is smiling, like hes won something.

"You're quiet, what are you up to now" Ominis says as hes eating his food

"Im not" Sebastian answers rather more defensively than he thougth

"Rigth.. " Ominis answers, not fully convinced.

"Im just... looking around at the hall" Sebastian says before he thinks, as he usually does

"Rigth,.. and, who is that you're staring at?" Ominis answers, reading through the lines of his friends lies

"Im not staring.. Im observing. There's a difference you know" Sebastian awsers

"Aha. Observing you say.. yet i can feel the tension between you and that poor, half bent fork in your hand"

Ominis says with an raised eyebrow

Sebastian looks down at his hand, there was indeed a fork there that was fighting for its life to not get bent. Sebastian lets go of it, then he mutters some words.

"theyre so loud, anyone would notice that"

But its not the noise that bothers him. Its the ease between them, how they laugh so carefree together, how they joke around, having some inside info that Sebastian isn't a part of. Normally it hasn't bothered him that much, but today is different. today he cant look away from them, fire and fury in his eyes, so obvious. Its everything he refuses to name.

Jacob punches Garreths arm playfully as he laughs at his joke. He takes another bite of his food, laughing, smiling, then he looks around the hall, and far far away he meets Sebastian's gaze, just barley. They hold the gaze a bit, and from in-between the students, his face immediately turns cold, the bright and bubbly expressions turn rather annoyed and cold. One can see an eyeroll coming off him before he turns away towards Garreth. Sebastian's heart skips a beat. a split second connection between them, a flash of recognition, but then, as fast as it appeared it dissapeared. Sebastian cant get the image out from his head. A happy, laughing, smiling, bright and bubbly Jacob facing him. His heartbeat skips again, but then, a sting comes, for how such perfect face turned annoyed and cold immediately after seeing him. He cannot put words on the sting, but its sharp, painful, and saddening.

He watches as Jacob turns back to his friend Garreth, his smile and bright expression returning to him. He watches more, noticing Jacobs laughter, how he talks to his fellow Gryffindors, as if this moment didn't happen at all, as if they just didn't look at eachother. Something in him clicks, his jaw tightens and he tries to look away, but cant. Hes envious, but he doesn't know that yet.

"Why cant the two of you just be friends? you know, i would be very grateful if my two dearest friends would get along you know.."

Ominis says, shaking his head hopelessly stabbing his fork into the food

"You two have been arguing nearly everyday for the last 2 and a half years, cant you just give it a rest now?" He adds

"Hes the impossible one, always searching for a fight, pushing my buttons, hes to stubborn and, and i cant be friends with someone like that." Sebastian answers running his hand trough his hair out of frustration. Hes trying to rationalize his thoughts, his feelings, to explain to himself why he cant stand this one simple Gryffindor.

Jacob and Garreth finish up their lunch and stand up from the Gryffindor table. Sebastians gaze follow them around as they walk towards the door. Then, one last time, Jacob turns around, looking at Sebastaian, before disappearing behind the doors. Sebastian scoffs, almost like a mocking smile forming on his face.

"Still 'observing'? " Ominis mutters

"Shut up" Sebastian answers. Too sharp, and too fast. Then he pushes away his plate as he stands up.

"where are you going?" Ominis says with a puzzled expression on his face

"Lost my appetite" Sebastian says in annoyance as he starts walking away

Ominis shakes his head, digging back into his food only muttering as he tries to eat up

"What am i going to do with you.."