The Truth About Her

10 | Irenic

Irenic

(adj.) promoting peace.

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EVER SINCE SHE LEFT her hometown and went off to college, she’s put all her efforts into keeping people away and her walls up, never allowing anyone to get too close. Her father may think she does that because of her condition, and while that may be one of the reasons, it is not the only one. The aftertaste of her mother’s death and her best friends’ betrayal, along with being dumped by her boyfriend, for whom she genuinely fell in love – as much in love as one can be in their teenage years, definitely left a scar on her. And even after so many years, it’s still sensitive to touch.

It comes as a surprise the fact that Cai, unknowingly and with no intention of doing so, tore her walls down and has made her feel so comfortable and at ease in his presence that she doesn’t feel ashamed or nervous to be her true self, joking around, talking, or simply hanging out with him feels like the most natural thing in the world. And while doing so, she realized how much she missed interacting with people her age. Her dad is a fantastic parent and has given her enough trust to tell him about anything, but there’s an invisible line he might overlook, but she doesn’t. There are things she’s not able to say to him, not because there’s a lack of trust but because he may not see from an unbiased point of view. With Cai, even if she hasn’t trusted him with previously mentioned things and thoughts, she feels like one she might.

As they sit on the furniture of his hotel room’s balcony, watching the sunset, Oceana takes a sip of her iced coffee while listening to Cai talk about some issues he had in his last semester. “So, I didn’t sleep for three whole days. I, honestly, didn’t think that was possible and let independently that I’d make it through.”

“That goes to show how determined you are,” she answers with a playful smile.

“Sure, more like I bit more than I could chew. After that, I decided not to take as many college credits in the following terms,” Cai chuckles. “I have one question, though.”

She glances at him with a curious look. “Yes?”

But he looks away with what seems to be slightly flushed cheeks. “This thing we have, is it only while we’re here, or does it continue after we get back to California?”

“And what is this thing we have?” She teases with a mischievous grin.

“I don’t know.” He shrugs, still not meeting her gaze. “I guess we’re friends.”

Their first kiss at the concert was also their last Cai hasn’t made any moves, and neither has she, not because she doesn’t want to – she’s been craving to do so every day since that night but because she’s not sure where they’re standing and if they’re on the same page about this thing they have, and given his previous question, neither is he. She doesn’t have much dating experience, and the tiny amount she has is not a good reference, but she knows communication is vital. Maybe, just maybe, if she and Theo had communicated back when they were together, they’d still be a couple in the present, or at least things wouldn’t have ended so badly. So, in this case, she knows it’d be best to bet on communication if this relationship s***h friendship is to get any further. 

Back in high school, she was pretty bold and feisty, and in some ways, she feels like she still is. It’s just that keeping people away also means avoiding the sort of situation that’d bring that side of her out, but since Cai managed to make her let her guard down, it wouldn’t do any harm to let him see a little bit more of what’s behind the walls she’s kept so fiercely all these years. Oceana leaves her chair, and with two steps, she’s standing in front of him before kneeling, crossed arms rest on his lap as she leans her torso closer. He, who had been sitting in a pretty relaxed position, seems to tense up and sits up straight before clearing his throat.

“Only friends?” She asks.

He stares at her in silence for a few seconds before cupping her face, taking her breath away, quite literally, when their lips lock; even if she did approach him with the intention of kissing him, the way he brings her closer surprises her. There’s an intensity, a need, a hunger that makes her feel desired. And it feels good to want someone and have that person reciprocate such desire at the same level, or even higher. 

“You’re killing me,” he whispers over her lips as he breaks the way kiss. “I’m holding myself back because I don’t want to rush you, but you’re driving me crazy.”

“In a good way, I hope,” she teases him as the corner of her mouth turns up into a small smile.

“In the best way,” he adds before planting a kiss on her lips once more.

Their moment is interrupted by the sound of a phone ringing. They pull apart, and she gets to get her feet to head inside the bedroom, recognizing the comical melody of her phone’s ringtone. The caller ID reads the word Dad, and she swiftly swipes her thumb across the screen to answer. “Hello?”

“Hi, kiddo. Jenny and Amelia are here with their families. They heard you were in town and showed up without warning,” he whispers, probably hidden in his bedroom as not to be heard by his sisters or their relatives. “I’m sorry. But do you think you can put up with them for a few hours? They’re staying for dinner, and you can bring Cai if you want to. He can keep you company.”

A knot makes its way into the pit of her stomach, causing her to feel sick. She stares out the balcony doors, glancing at Cai, who’s already looking at her with a curious look. The day was going so great, and she only hoped it would end the same way, but it seems like life has another thing going. “Do I really have to?”

“Oceana, I know they’re complicated and not easy to deal with, but they’re the only family we have,” he argues, trying to persuade her. There’s a hidden meaning behind his words, and she knows he’s not brave enough to say it aloud. Even so, she already knows it – they’re the only family they have due to the well-known but unspoken fact that her late mother’s family despises her and her father.

“Alright,” she mumbles, heaving a sigh. “I’ll ask Cai, and I’ll be home for dinner.”

After hanging up and throwing the phone at the bed, she approaches Cai, who takes her hand once they’re close enough. “Something wrong?”

She rolls her eyes. “Family stuff.”

He pulls at her arms, and in one swift move, he brings her down, so she’s sitting on his lap and embraces her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“You’ll find out soon enough,” she laughs dryly. “There’ll be a family dinner at my house tonight. My dad says you can join us if you want to.”

“Do you want me to?” He asks, tightening his embrace, pressing their bodies closer together.

She rests her head on his shoulder, mainly as a way to avoid his gaze, for heat is starting to crawl up her cheek and will surely give away how embarrassed she’s feeling. “If I didn’t, I wouldn’t tell you in the first place.”

He chuckles. "Is it so hard to say yes?"

"Shut up and go get ready," she says while freeing away from his embrace. "We have to be at my house in an hour."

He gets to his feet. His tall figure now towers over hers. "We have plenty of time. It won't take me a whole hour to get ready."

"No, but I have to get ready too. So, we have to get there a bit earlier," she explains.

"You can shower here if you want to," Cai smirks and steps closer. His eyes scan her body with a mischievous glint.

She laughs at his expression. "And what would I wear?" 

"Mhm." He looks up thoughtfully. "If we don't go to the dinner, then you don't have to wear anything."

"If this is you, holding yourself back, I can't imagine what you're like when you don't," she teases him and then pushes him gently. "Come on now, go get ready."

"Alright," he whines, gives her a quick peck, and heads back inside the room. 

She follows him into the bedroom, lets her body fall over the mattress with a thud sound, and watches him go into the bathroom. Cai winks at her with a cheeky grin before closing the bathroom door. After a few blinks, she closes her eyes, letting out a breath. As much as she wanted this day to have a good ending just like its beginning, she knows it won't happen. Her aunts will surely bring out the worst in her, and if her father finds out that she's been recklessly ignoring her pills, it will bring about a long, tedious lecture.

After a few minutes, the sound of her phone causes her to slowly open her eyes as she gropes the bed, searching for the device. Once it's in her hand, she picks it up only to find an i********: notification that takes her breath away.

theo.hutchens:

Hi, sorry to DM you. I don't have your phone number. Can we meet up?