Dawn of Love

02

Did I say that I was the only one who knew about my unrequited love?

Hah. All that was about to change when Austyn and his family spent the weekend at our house the summer after our graduation from middle school. 

"Willow. Willow get up. Get up right now. We need to talk." I groaned grumpily being brashly awaken from my deep slumber. I wanted to lash out at him but hearing his very serious and deep voice, I decided not to.

"What is it?" I sluggishly spoke as I pulled myself to sit up "What's the matter?" I reached for my phone and squinted my eyes to look at the time "Austyn, it's 4am in the morning. What's so urgent that you wanted to talk about it right now?" My eyes were still squinting, unable to open wide because of the bright light in my room. 

"What's this?" Austyn held up something rectangular.

"What's what?"

"Open your eyes. Maybe you can see." 

I slowly opened my eyes and the moment I realized what it was. I sprang out of bed with vigor rushing through my veins and tried to snatch it away from my cousin's hands "Give that back to me, Austyn." I sternly commanded

However, he was taller than me. So he'd only have to stretch his arm up high and my diary would immediately be out of reach. I stood my ground, crossed my arms and looked at him angrily. "Did you read it?"

"Only the important parts." His voice had a hint of amusement in them but his face was as stern as a rock. "Do you like River?"

"What the hell Austyn, that's invasion of privacy."

"Answer me." His expression darkened

I chewed my cheek anxiously, avoiding his gaze. Austyn was really scary when he gets angry. Though I don't understand why.

"I'm not that patient Willow. Tell me or else."

"Or else what?" I snapped my head to look at him worriedly

"He'll get his hands on this." his voice was low and full of threat. I know he was serious.

"NO! Austyn!"

"So? What's your answer?"

"What do you need my answer for?! It's all written in there!" I shouted in frustration. These are one of those days I wished I didn't have a cousin.

Austyn paused for a moment and dropped his arm. Then he looked at me with warning in his eyes. "Stop it. Whatever it is you're feeling for him. River's not good for you."

"What?" Why is he telling me this?

"Stay away from him. Stop liking him. He's not the kind of guy I'd like for my precious cousin to end up with." his voice and expression changed as he put his hand over head. It was his way of showing affection.

I was a little taken aback and ultimately touched. But my angsty self wanted to reign over the situation "You don't get to decide who I like or who I end up with." I snarled at him as I aggressively shook his hand away "Give that back to me this instant."

"If that's the case." he paused as he looked at my diary in his hands "I'll hold onto this for the mean time." he then walked towards my door and stopped before stepping out. 

"What? No!" I protested. He had no right to keep my diary hostage! It's private property!

Then he turned around, his expression melancholic "I'm not forcing you to do anything, Willow. I'm just concerned for you. You're too good and smart for him. Don't dumb yourself down. Also, if you don't want people to read through your diary. Quit leaving it in the porch swing." after he spoke, he slammed the door shut leaving me frozen on my spot. I snuggled on my bed and cried like 2 year old kid.

Days went by and Austyn didn't speak to me about my feelings toward River nor my diary - thank goodness. But I'd still get anxious whenever I remember that he has it. It held so many secrets and my deepest thoughts that he could use it against me! Though I doubt he'd expose me, but at the very least he could internally blackmail me if he wanted to.

Just thinking about it, gives me endless migraines.

The worst part however, was his non-verbal and not so subtle (to me at least) gestures and body languages whenever I hang out at his place and River and the others were there. Austyn would always make sure that there would always be a massive gap between River and I. Which was hilarious at the same time. He didn't need to go such great lengths since River doesn't even see me at all.

One day, I barged into his room, to get out whatever is on my chest -

"Would you just quit whatever you're doing?" I roared at him as I sat on the edge of his bed.

"What am I doing?" Austyn was playing some games on his phone and he didn't look up at me as he replied

"You know what you're doing. Just stop. It's so cringy and awkward."

"If you stop. I'll stop." his voice so emotionless, it makes me even more annoyed

"Whatever." I rolled my eyes "And by the way, if you thoroughly read my diary, you'd know that I am nothing but air to him."

"I know. I don't have to read it to know."

"Since you know, what are you even doing? It's pointless!"

Austyn pursed his lips and didn't respond until after a few seconds "There are things that only guys can see through other guys."

"What? What does that even mean? Are you turning into a monk now?"

"Doesn't matter. Scram. And keep your distance."

I groaned in exasperation and grabbed his phone, threw it away before running away and slamming the door as loud as I could. I understand his protective stance but it's not like anything's gonna happen. The guy doesn't even spare me a glance!

Days and weeks passed by so quickly that before we even knew it, it was the last day of summer and finally here we are at the first day of Freshman year. I had a good holiday though, apart from the occasional teasing from Austyn, it was really good. I got to hang out with River and without any other girls lingering (thankfully) and I had brought those same high spirits with me today. 

I just had good feeling this year. Like, everything's gonna change for the better for me. Imagine my delight when I found out that Austyn, Jamie, Reid AND River have the same classes as me! Talk about fate!

But as soon as I entered our first class, a face that I never wanted to see for the remainder of my life, came into view - Lexi Wilson - my number one bully. And there she was hovering over River, with the most provocative expression and stance. 

Oh boy, I knew everything perfect would too good to be true. I rolled my eyes and drooped my shoulders in despair as I sat on my chair. I unconsciously turned my head around to see how River was responding to Lexi and I sighed a breath of relief when I saw that he's not in the slightest interested in her and had his head bent down the whole time.

The next second, however, sent my heart flying to outer space. River *freakin* Leon slightly lifted his head and LOOKED. STRAIGHT. AT. ME. 

I snapped my head away in panic. My heart was pounding at my chest. My breathing quickened like I just ran a sprint. My head was spinning. I never really knew what to do since I was so used to being ignored by him!

"Willow right?" 

My head spun to the source of the voice and my mouth spoke before I even got to realize who it was "What?"

The guy faintly sneered and looked at someone behind me "You didn't tell me your cousin was deaf."

I felt like I was hit by a truck when realization sets in. My eyes widened as I slowly turned my head to both my sides. On my right, Austyn was sitting beside me with a stern look on his face and on my left - River was sitting there and staring at me calmly.

WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON? RIVER TALKED TO ME. LOOKED AT ME. AND SAID MY NAME.

AM I DEAD?