Shattered Dreams

1232 Words
Ariana's POV I woke up gasping and pressed my back flat against the damp sheets. My hands were already clenched into the blanket like it could stop me from falling apart. Davian’s voice drilled into my skull again, clear as that rainy night outside the café. “You were never enough, Ariana. I needed someone who actually made me look good. Not some scholarship girl chasing stories no one cares about.” I could still see the way his lip curled when he said it, the way rain slid down his jacket while he turned and walked off with her arm linked through his. She laughed at something he whispered, and I stood there holding two coffees that were going cold. Every secret I told him in the dark; my fears about failing, my worries about money and the way I cried about my parents’ fights, he had turned into punchlines for his friends. I sat up slowly and digged my fingers into my thighs. I swallowed hard a few times but the lump stayed. I got out of bed and walked to the sink on stiff legs, I splashed cold water on my face and stared at my reflection; the same slim build, same plain features, same eyes that now looked flat and tired. I brushed my teeth in silence as the mechanical back-and-forth motion sound filled the room. My phone screen glowed with the scholarship reminder: Portfolio due in five days, keep the grades or lose the funding. My chest tightened again, I pulled on jeans and my gray sweater, tied my hair back tight, and made instant coffee. The bathroom door clicked open. Becca came out with her towel twisted around her wet hair. Her shoulder-length brown strands stuck out in every direction, and her bright smile hit me before I was ready for it. She always looked like she had just heard a good joke, even at eight in the morning. “Morning, sunshine” she said, dropping onto her bed and grabbing her mascara. “You were making those sounds again in your sleep. Another one about Davian?” I stayed by the desk, gripping my coffee mug with both hands. “Yeah, same crap.” Becca’s smile faded a little, she twisted the mascara wand slowly. “Ari, it’s been six months. You can’t keep letting him live rent-free in your head like this. Come to the hockey house party with me tonight, just one night. Remember you used to love getting dressed up with me.” I shook my head and set the mug down. “I’ve got an article draft due and notes to organize, scholarship doesn’t care if I’m tired or sad, Becca. One bad semester and I’m back home with nothing.” Becca leaned forward, her expressive face serious now. “That’s what kills me. You used to talk about falling in love like it was this big adventure, remember how you’d gush about the guy who would actually listen? Now you shut down every time I mention dating. What did Davian really do to you? Tell me again, because I still don’t get how one guy broke my best friend this bad.” I sat on the edge of my bed, knees together and stared at the floor. I twisted the hem of my sweater. “He made me believe I was safe with him. I told him about how my parents screamed at each other over money, I told him how scared I was of ending up like them; always chasing someone’s approval. He held me and said I was his safe place too. Then he used every word against me and laughed about it with his buddies. I gave him parts of me I never gave anyone, and he treated them like jokes.” Becca moved over and sat beside me. Her shoulder bumped mine gently. “I hate him for that, I really do. Because of him you stopped smiling the way you used to and you barely talk about anything except classes now. I miss the Ariana who believed people could be good. Love isn’t always a trap, you know. Some guys actually stick around and mean what they say.” I let out a short breath and stood up, needing space. “I watched my parents chase each other’s validation until the house felt like a war zone. Davian proved it to me again, love is just people using each other until someone better shows up. I’m not doing that s**t anymore, I have to focus on my journalism degree, my scholarship and my own future, that’s it.” Becca watched me pack my bag. “Okay, but I’m still your roommate and your best friend, I’m not giving up on you. One day someone’s going to make you feel seen without making you pay for it later. Promise me you’ll at least think about the party? Even if it’s just for an hour.” I zipped my bag and gave her a small nod. “I’ll think about it, let’s just get to class first.” We walked out together into the busy campus paths. Becca kept talking, her voice light again. “This guy in my communications class keeps smiling at me, he’s got this dimple thing when he laughs. Do you think I should ask him for coffee or am I being stupid?” I adjusted my bag strap. “Ask him how he talks about his exes first, Davian used to smile at me the same way, then trash me when I wasn’t around. Just… be careful who you give your time to.” Becca laughed softly and bumped my shoulder. “There she is, the old Ari giving smart advice she won’t take herself. I love you, even when you’re like this. Text me if you change your mind about tonight.” She hugged me quick before heading to her building. I kept walking alone toward journalism class and put my earbuds in. The loneliness sat heavy in my stomach even after all her talking. People moved around me laughing and calling to friends, but I felt separate from all of it. In class I took my usual seat, opened my notebook and wrote down every word Professor Langdon said about reporting ethics. I kept my head down and my focus narrow, no room for memories and no room for what-ifs about love or trust. After class I headed toward the library, cutting across the main quad, hockey banners flapped overhead. I didn’t see him. My shoulder slammed into a solid chest. I stumbled, feet slipping on the pavement. Strong hands caught my arms, steadying me. For a split second I was pulled against a warm, broad body. My palms pressed against his team jacket. His grip was firm but careful. I looked up. Jace Carter’s dark eyes met mine. Time stretched strangely. His breath brushed my forehead, making my heart hammer against my ribs. Something quiet and unexpected passed between us, a pull I couldn’t name and didn’t want. His fingers lingered a fraction longer than necessary on my arms before he let go. I stepped back quickly, my cheeks burning, and muttered something incoherent before hurrying away, head down. The entire campus might be in love with Jace Carter. But Ariana Brooks wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.
Free reading for new users
Scan code to download app
Facebookexpand_more
  • author-avatar
    Writer
  • chap_listContents
  • likeADD