The Lawes Girl

17

A lot can happen in six months. Such as conversations and smiles that give the impression that someone has been forgiven. But that was nothing to Nick's still guilty conscience compared to seeing Lucille walking into his office with Marvin by her side. Giving truth to the rumour that he did have a child. Shocking the entire building to find out it was with Lucille. Which explained why she quit when she did and her appearance in his office the few times she did visit. It was easy to figure out for those who were intrigued enough to do a few calculations. But for those who didn't mind a few rumours...

   Back to the point... main point. Nick loved it when Lucille visited him at work with Marvin. It was of course her way of telling him not to go by the house that day. That they'd have

Lunch instead. He didn't care. Today however, although he had been informed she was around, she hadn't knocked on his door. He got a little worried. Or perhaps, just like old times, she had chosen to take the stairs. "Where were you?" He asked the moment they walked in. The scene brought back memories... a memory. When he yelled at her for being late and then accused her of being with his father. He smiled to hide his guilt. Hell, he'd been foolish. Bart knew it. He was a coward. How possible is it that he is that way with her? Her and only her.

   For months all he needed was for her to forgive him. And now that she has, he's ridden with guilt. Or had that just not changed from the second he realised what he'd done to her? He was out of his chair and walking towards them. "Hi." Lucille smiled. "We bumped into Renee on the way up. She insisted we see Bryan first."

   "Okay." He moved his gaze from her to his son.

"Are you ready?"

   "I've been ready. Are you ready?" He asked Marvin. Who smiled, raising his arms for Nick to carry him. "I'll take that as a yes."

    Bryan stared in shock. He didn't bother looking at Quincy because well, Quincy never gave himself away. Bryan just stared at Nick trying to comprehend what his son just told him... them. He stood beside a sitting Quincy. Quincy's right elbow rested on the arm rest his index and middle fingers pulling up his temple. Making his eyebrow looked arched. Nick felt like he was being interviewed. Interrogated to be precise. But he had requested to meet with them, they agreed and he did all the talking. The room grew hot all too quickly for his liking. No one was talking. Did they not hear him? 

   Bryan scoffed. "And what? Your sick depraved way of showing it is leaving her when she needed you?"

   "That's not it." Quincy commented, getting to his feet. 

Bryan stepped back for him to pass. "You're right. Pretending to care about her and your unborn child for what?"

   "Five months." Quincy stuffed his hand in his pockets and stared at the bookshelf that was suddenly interesting. 

   "Five months, exactly. That was your way of showing her you're in love with her?"

   "Not exactly. I didn't know it at the time."

"Really? So what changed?" Bryan folded his arms. He laughed in disbelief. "You're unbelievable, you know that?"

   "Explain yourself." Quincy ordered without taking his eyes off the books.

   "You can't possibly be serious Quincy."

"Let him talk Bryan. You can yell at him when he's done."

   "You can't think there's some sort of reasonable explanation behind those sick twisted things he did?"

   "I thought you more than anyone, liked good entertainment?"

"I'm not joking about this. I really do l-"

   "Then explain it to us." Quincy said. He knew Nick wasn't joking. But he wasn't about to tell him that.

   Great. It was Bryan who was taking it seriously and Quincy who thought he was joking. Quincy thought he was joking. "I figured I'd tell you both first. What with you being her father and you throwing me away for her." Quincy smirked. Bryan clenched his jaw continously. Nick blinked rapidly. "I..."

   It was Lucille's twenty fourth birthday. It was quite the party. Nothing too fancy. Not like the ones she had to attend for work purposes. But it was big. Nina went all out for it. Everyone was in attendance. Lucille had to be everywhere at once. Collecting gifts smiling and making conversation that wasn't the least bit forced. Nina held on to Marvin the entire night. 

   Nick had to stay in a corner. Any simple movement caught by Nina ended up with her sending him deathly glares. He couldn't risk being the cause of an argument. Nina is capable of keeping her emotions in check. But one hellish dinner evening proved she was also capable of doing otherwise. 

    One look in the right direction, and he spotted Wes talking to Lucille. There was quite the gleam in Wes' eyes. Not that Nick noticed. He felt however, like it must have been quite the conversation. The way the pair of them were. Wes was always half an inch away from touching Lucille only to not. Then there was one other thing. Wes wanted to say something. Lucille waited for a few seconds. When his lips didn't move, she turned on her heels. Nick walked over to Wes' side. They stood side by side like they had the first time they met. They hadn't had a real or any conversation whatsoever since then. But they did acknowledge each other. "You still can't tell her can you?" Nick asked. 

   "Neither can you apparently." They were also both aware of the other's feeling for Lucille. 

   Geegee grabbed Lucille's arm, pulling her to a corner where Nina was waiting along with Nancy. "So?" Geegee asked eagerly. "Did Wes say anything?" They'd hoped that today, Wes would finally stop pulling a Wes. Lucille still kept the almost kiss to herself. 

   She looked up, locking eyes with Nick for a second. A second enough to make her heart beat faster and her hands grow warm. When did that start? "Uhh... No."

    "What?" There goes that hope.

"I told you Geegee. He wouldn't do it." Nina said.

    "But he knows that you know right? I mean it's so obvious." Nancy pointed out. 

    "No." Lucille shook her head. "We wouldn't be standing here having this conversation if he did."

    Geegee rubbed her arm. "Maybe he's just waiting."

"For what exactly?" Nina planted her free hand on her free hip. Marvin looked around the hall full of people.

    "I dunno. Maybe later tonight. It's pretty unromantic to ask you out in front of all these people. He's probably thinking... you know, when it's quiet and you two can be alone."

    Lucille smiled brightly. Knowing full well that that wouldn't happen. Even if they were alone. "No. You're thinking it." Nina corrected. "He's not going to say anything."

    "You don't know that for sure."

"We don't even know why he hasn't said anything yet." Nancy chimed in,

    "You noticed." Nick pointed out.

"So did you."

    "Yours is not very hard to miss." Wes smiled. "Congratulations on your fourth consecutive win."

    "Thank you." Wes nodded once.

"So let me guess. One look from her and everything you want to tell her disappears."

    "It's like some sort of spell." They faced each other. "And even if that weren't the case. She's just so-"

    "Next to her it's like you're not worthy. Or I'm not worthy."

"Same here."

    "Wait, why do you feel that way? Cause I understand that I hurt her. I doubt I'm back in her good graces even though I doubt I was ever even in it."

    Wes looked at her, in the midst of her friends and her sister chatting away. "She's the daughter of a billionaire. And I'm nothing. I talk to her sure. But I open my mouth to say what I want to say and-"

    "Nothing comes out." Nick laughed. "Trust me. I get it."

"Look at her. Not only is it her birthday, but it's the grand opening of her very own hotel."

    "Star Light." Nick liked the name. "Makes you wonder what you can do for her doesn't it?"

    Nina stepped to the centre of the hall. "attention everyone."

"Hi. Excuse me." A lady walked up to the two men. They turned to her. "Wes Rangle?"

    "Yes?" She smiled.

"Thank you all for coming to this two for one event." Nina spoke. "Lucille would also love for you all to be her very first guests. At Star Light to night. So please, grab a key from a passing waiter and enjoy your stay at her beautiful hotel tonight. Free. Thank you."

    Nick was sweating, tapping his hands almost violently by his sides. He was losing his composure. Wes assessed him, having pulled his attention away from his new lady friend. "I don't think you're supposed to look that pale. Are you okay?"

   "I'm not actually." Nick walked off after that answer. He'd given his phials and bags to Bart. He found his friend. "Give me." He ordered.

    Bart's forehead creased. Worried. "I thought you were quiting."

    "B."

"You don't look well man."

    "That's why I want it." He almost yelled. He wasn't handling the withdrawal very well. 

    "Nicky." He wanted to say something annoying. 

"Don't call me that. Give it."

    "Nick-"

"Just, hand it over alright. It doesn't matter what I do. Just hand it over." Bart obeyed. Nick snatched the bag violently yet subtly and rushed to the restroom. 

    It was a different heat from the one he was feeling. This one came from his heart. Soothing. Soooo soothing he could feel it forever. If his body wasn't itching so much. He took the glass of scotch she handed him. Lucille smiled like an angel. "Tell me. What exactly happened with the plane and the teenagers?"

    Nick raised an eyebrow and smiled. Then he chuckled, looking at the glass, the liquid rippling. "You're obsessed with the fact that I fly planes."

    "It's like you're some sort of Howard Hughes." She sat beside him on the couch. 

   "That's the CEO. Not me. And Howard was into a whole lot more."

    "It doesn't matter. Just tell me. You said you were nineteen."

"I was seventeen." He sniffed. Feeling dizzy. "It- I flew with the CEO once. And I kept going to the cockpit and asking questions. So I got lessons after that. He encouraged my fascination. But something happened in school. I got beat real bad and I got sick. It gave me a lot of time to think. It was crazy, but I told them that I was throwing a party and they weren't invited. You know how bullies get. It's 'give me this or else.' Not to mention the thrill of partying on a jet. They ate up the idea. There was a lot more to it that I can't really remember. But that's when I realised I was good at convincing people. They came over with their girlfriends and you know the rest."

    She'd been assessing him the whole time. He looked pale and sweaty, itchy and restless. But she kept quiet about it. "You're mom said you never admitted to it."

    "Now you know my secret." He winked and she laughed. 

She'd kept quiet long enough. "Are you okay? You look really-"

    "I'm fine." He sighed heavily. 

"So what happened after that?"

    He rubbed his neck. Damn it. He couldn't keep this up. "Hey Umm... Lucille?"

    "Mmm?"

"I-" She wouldn't take this well. "I have to go away f- for a few days." She focused on him. "Weeks actually." She raised her eyebrows. "A- a few months to be exact." She glared at him, focused for a second, then as if she realised something... which she did, her eyebrows smoothed out. He panicked. "I-I- It's not like that."

   "Like what?" She shifted to the edge of the couch.

"Wait, Lucille-"

   "If you're leaving, you're leaving."

"I'm not leaving leaving. It's just for a few months. I know I've said that before but I'll be back, I promise."

   "Don't do that Nick."

"What can I do? What can I do to make you believe me?"

   "Nothing." 

Her calmness made it worse. "I'll give you my car keys. M-my house keys. Just anything." 

   "You're a rich man Nick, you can get those things in your sleep."

   "I told you I'm not going anywhere and I meant it. Still do."

"And yet." She smiled.

   "I will be back. I just have to do this- this work thing." He just couldn't bring himself to tell her it was rehab.

   "When are you leaving?" She looked away.

"Two days."

   "Okay." She got up. 

He got up too. He didn't like this. Not her reaction to the news or lying to her. He wanted to be clean for them. But he didn't want her to know. And her lack of emotion towards it made it so hard to convince her. "Lucille, the only thing that will keep me away from him is death. Or one hell of an accident. I swear I'll be back." He stepped in her way, his eyes begging hers.

   "You should spend more time with M. You know, before you leave."

   "Tell me what to do. I'll call you everyday, I'll-"

"Don't do that." She scoffed. She didn't know how to react. She was too busy fighting an internal battle to think of what to do or say to Nick. He was doing it again and she hated herself for letting it happen. Six weeks... few months. What living hell? Did he just want to see her ride an emotional rollercoaster? And why did she feel so used when she knew he was capable of doing this? Everything in her was fighting. Hating herself for letting him in, for letting her guard down and for feeling bad that this was happening all over again. It was chaotic in her head, too much noise. 'I told you so.' Was suddenly a screaming song. Kicking her and reminding her of everything that had happened in the last eight months since his final apology. It was draining.

   "Lucille?"

"Just go Nick. Marvin's asleep anyway." 

   The soft tone of her voice was torturous. "I'm coming back. I promise. 

   "Yeah. See you tomorrow."

The day after he left, Lucille got an envelope at work. His house keys and car keys inside. With a note. 

     'I'll be back I promise. Until then, I'll call you everyday.' 

She didn't believe him. She tossed the note in the trash and dumped the keys in her desk drawer. 

   For over thirty minutes, Lucille had been on the phone with Wes. Talking and talking and talking. With Wes, she didn't have to think about Nick. Wes was like a safe space. Or a small room where nothing mattered... isn't that what a safe space is? Wes talked about his driving and almost getting crushed in his last race. Although she saw it on TV, it was nice to hear him say it from his perspective. And after everything, he still won. He came in fourth after he came in second in the race she went to see with Nina and Marvin. But since then it's been first place all the way. "My heart was in my mouth that night. I don't know how you do it."

   "Trust me. I was pretty terrified. I was shaking when I got out of the car."

   "It didn't look that way to me. Considering the smile on your face."

   "It won Luce. Of course I was smiling. I'll send the medal over for Marvin."

   "Don't you want him to win his own medals?"

"I like that he has them. I like giving them to him."

    "Shouldn't you keep them. Or at least give it to your girlfriend?"

    "Girlfriend?"

"Yeah. You know. The girl who was clinging to you. She was by your side when you got the medal. Oh no Wes! Did you already break up with her?" Wes burst out laughing. "The race was two days ago. You're already locking lips with someone else?"

    "I don't think I should answer that."

"Uhh... I think you should."

    He sighed and cleared his throat. "I'm not answering that."

"Tough luck. You already did. Silence says a lot Wes. Just ask daddy."

    Wes laughed even harder. "You're probably right."

Lucille was suddenly struck with an idea. Intrigued by the answer she might receive, she just had to ask. When silence fell on them. "Do you think about it?"

    "What?"

"Kissing me."

    Wes choked on air. Grateful that he wasn't sitting right next to her even though he'd been wishing all through their conversation that he was. But the one question that got him thinking maybe she knew how he felt had given way to a flood of tells that would give away his feelings. From how wide his eyes had gotten, to choking and to how he sat up stiffly. "Luce." He cleared his throat. 

    "Yeah?"

"You just said it yourself, I have a girlfriend."

    "So? It's not like you're cheating. You've either thought about it or you haven't." She glared expectantly at the TV as if it were him. His next words crucial to her. Come on Wes. Juuussst say it. But the other end was quiet. "Well?" She just heard him breathing. "I know I ha-"

    "Of course I have. And Nina and Geegee." Is he for real? "At one point or another."

    Lucille released her glaring hold on the TV in great disappointment. Does he intend to keep this up? She smiled. She should have known. "All three of us?"

    "It's kind of a fantasy."

"What?" He laughed at her shock. "You'll be killed three times over."

    "I'm pretty sure I'll be tortured first."

"Oh! Good. At least you know what would happen."

    He chuckled, as a question came to him. 'So what was you're excuse this time?' He raked his hand through his hair. "Of course I do."

    "Wes, you're an idiot." She meant it. And not for the reason he thought. 

    "I know." He meant it. And not for the reason she thought... as far as either of them knew.

   "There was an incident, Nick wouldn't be coming back for a while." 

   Bart reported to Bryan. Lucille hadn't said a word about Nick since he vanished again. But that didn't keep Bryan from trying to find out. And then there was Renee worrying. But every time he asked Bart, he got very little information. Like right now. He glared at the one friend of Nick's he had access to. "It's been months." He pointed out. 

    Nick had relapsed. "Yes I know. But, Mister Atkins, I have no idea what's going on. He just told me to tell you there was an incident. But he's fine."

    "Does he intend to inform Lucille?"

"She's not picking his calls."

     "So he's been calling her?"

Too much information. "I- I think so, yes."

    "What exactly is his plan?"

"I have no idea."

    The chauffeur stood beside Lucille as she opened the car door. "Daddy's house please, I need to pick up Marvin." She got in and he closed the door. It took her a second, but she felt the heat and presence of another person by her left. A familiar scent hit her. One glance in that direction and she nearly jumped out of her skin.

    Nick smirked. Her composed yet startled reaction clear as day to him in the shade of the car. "Hi Cilley."

    "Nick!" She called out with a gasp like he was her secret.

"I told you I'll be back."

    "To scare me to death?"

He chuckled. "I'm sorry. That wasn't the plan. You weren't supposed to take too long to realise I was in here."

    "Was he in on this?" She pointed at the front.

"Don't fire him. For once please."

    She wasn't thinking about that. "Nick, it's been six months."

"I know. I would have come back months ago but something happened." She let out a sigh of relief. Nick couldn't help staring. He missed her. Too damn much. "I should be mad at you."

    "Me? You're the one who just scared me."

"You never picked up your phone."

    "Was I supposed to believe you were coming back?"

"Yes." He smiled. "I said I would. And I'm here."

    "I didn't believe you." She looked away nonchalantly. Her heart was beating way too fast. Was she happy he was back? Or still startled?

    He moved close to her. Pure mischief in his eyes. She snapped her head in his direction, assessing the small space between them. Is this right? He caught her eyes with his, locked in quite the stare. She felt hot all of a sudden. Her eyebrows furrowed in defence. "Make it up to me?"

    "With what?" It was hard to blinked away.