Trauma Grieving

Chapter 13

Vee's POV_

I stormed out of the living room, feeling like I was going to explode. Johnson just didn't get it. He didn't understand what I was going through, what I was feeling.

I paced back and forth in our bedroom, trying to calm down. But I couldn't shake the feeling that Johnson was trying to fix me, that he thought I was broken.

I felt like I was losing myself in all of this. I was a wife, a mother, a daughter, but who was I, really? What did I want?

I stopped pacing and looked at myself in the mirror. Who was this person staring back at me? I didn't recognize her.

I felt like I was living in a fog, like I was just going through the motions. And Johnson, with his suggestions and his solutions, just seemed like he was adding to the fog.

I didn't know what to do, or where to turn. All I knew was that I needed some space, some time to figure out who I was and what I wanted.

I sat on the couch, staring blankly at the wall as Jack climbed onto my lap. He wrapped his small arms around my neck, and I felt a wave of love and guilt wash over me.

"Mommy, why are you sad?" Jack asked, his voice soft and concerned.

I smiled weakly and hugged him tight. "I'm just a little stressed, sweetie. Mommy's okay."

But Jack's big brown eyes looked up at me with a deep understanding. "You need a hug," he said, squeezing me tight.

My heart melted at his words, and I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes. This little boy, with his innocence and love, was a reminder of what truly mattered in life.

As I hugged Jack, I felt a sense of peace wash over me. Maybe I wasn't alone in this. Maybe I could find a way to be a better mom, a better person, for him and for my family.

"Thank you, Jack," I whispered, holding him close. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Jack smiled and snuggled into my chest, and for a moment, everything felt okay.

As I had Jack on my lap, I couldn't help but think about the past few days. The argument with Johnson, the tension in the house, the feeling of being overwhelmed. I knew I needed to make a change, but I wasn't sure where to start.

Jack looked up at me with big brown eyes and said, "Mommy, I love you."

I smiled and hugged him tight. "I love you too, sweetie. More than anything in the world."

As I held Jack, I felt a sense of clarity wash over me. I knew I couldn't change everything at once, but I could start with small steps. I could start by being more present, more mindful, and more patient.

I looked at Jack and said, "You know what, kiddo? Mommy's going to try to do better. I'm going to try to be more patient and more understanding."

Jack smiled and hugged me again. "I'll help you, Mommy."

I laughed and hugged him back. "I know you will, sweetie. We'll do it together."

As I held Jack, I felt a sense of hope that I hadn't felt in a long time. Maybe, just maybe, things would start to get better.