Thorns of Roses

Tragedy (Part II)

Song for this Chapter:

Drowning-Backstreet boys

CHAPTER 88

BLAZE

Sometime that night for I don’t know how many hours I have been sitting still on our used to be house’s floor, the door opened.

For a minute, I had a burst of feeling of happiness that it is Corinne. Because only I and she knew the penthouse’ passcode, but when I turn around, I was surprised to a very disoriented and blood shot eyed, Diesel holding a piece of paper. A paper that I know so well.

She used to use that scented paper whenever she’s leaving me a note inside our house.

“Where is she?”

He scoffed “Now, you had the f*****g audacity to asked me, where is she?”

“I don’t have the energy to do this with you.” I pour myself another scotch as he stays standing inside my house.

“Don’t worry, I am not intending to talk the s**t out off you. You f*****g deserve to be alone and isolated for what you did to her.” He walks towards the kitchen island from where I am leaning. “I just want you to f*****g remember what you did to her before her last days.” He placed the paper on the kitchen bar, slid it in front of me, and all I wanted to do was sniff the scent out of that paper and feel that she is here with me instead of him.

“I hope you get what you deserve. I hope you’ll be happy, truly.” He smirks evilly, and I know all his wishes is nothing but a sarcasm.

I didn’t answer him back, just like I told him, I don’t have the energy. And one more thing is that I am so eager to see what’s inside this scented paper.

As soon as Diesel’s gone. I opened the paper and I was immediately engulfed by her scent.

Her scent that I have been missing for weeks now, and now, I don’t have the chance to smell her again, to see her glowing eyes, her blushing cheeks, her pale white skin, and her long raven hair.

She’s nowhere to be found.

And Diesel was right, I will be remembering how I treated her before she’s gone for good.

I kept thinking, what if I fought for her, and protected her with all my might? And I didn’t let my own guilt and feelings consume the love I have for her? Maybe she was still here. Maybe I get to feel her love forever.

But it’s too late.

I am f*****g too late.

She’s gone too soon.

She left me so soon.

Inside the scented paper, is her very beautiful and persistent cursive handwriting, that if you look closely, you will mistake this was made for about a decade ago.

“My Dearest Matthew,

I am mad at you. Infuriatingly mad at you.

But it can’t replace the fact that I am so in love with you.

I love you too much that I am afraid that if I didn’t choose to leave now, I won’t be able had the courage to leave you all at once and give you the happiness you wanted for so long.

I am deeply sorry.

I am sorry, because I know I used you just to escape the hell I had been through with my so-called parents.

But I wanted you to know, that even if I tried to love you less or didn’t want to love you even.

I had love your soul before anything else.

I love your darkness, I love your thunder, I love your fire.

And before I even knew it, I love everything about you.

I am leaving you.

But I have to leave in order for you to love me too.

I know it was hopeless, as I see that you love my friend, Hannah. And I wanted to be mad at both of you, but in the first place, I realized that it was me who stop you both for having your best life together.

Just know, that I understand why you did what you did. And all wished for is for you to be happy.

Be happy, you deserve that.

I love you, Matthew. My Matthew, even once in a while.

Till we meet again.

Love,

Corinne.

After I reads the message, all I ever wanted to do is kill myself.

And be with her.

Too late. I am f*****g too late.

I also looked at the accompanying letters. Photos at the stadium show an unconscious Corinne being picked up by Noah Kavinksy and put in his car. The image made my blood boil. I know the truth, and I also know Noah Kavinsky's reasons why he did that, and I promise he will get what he deserves.

And the other photo for what it looks like an Ultrasound named after Corinne the only thing I read was healthy fetal in thirteen weeks and six days. Fetal, Baby?

And that is when I realized that it wasn’t just Corinne I had lost in that explosion.

She’s pregnant with my child, and I had lost her too.