Thorns of Roses

Like a Rose

SONG FOR THIS CHAPTER:

ALL TOO WELL (10 MINUTES VERSION)-TAYLOR SWIFT

CHAPTER 10

CORINNE

After my class, I chose to stay in the library first. I know Diesel won't stop me pestering me with the details about me and Blaze last night. And I can't afford for anyone else to hear or know that I'm also one of the hypocrites here in Riverdale.

Aside from that, I don’t know if I can face him today after what I just witness at the hallway earlier. The way his eyes sparkles and checks out my own sister.

I am jealous, far from it even. Who wouldn’t? I’ve been wanting that gaze for a long time, but he resented me for that and gave it to my sister without hesitation who never considered him one of the Mayhems. And doesn’t even looked on his way.

It’s unfair, right?

It's not that I blame him that I chose to stay for the endless nights that I'm the only one he has whenever he experiences breakdowns. Endless days I put up with his childishness even though sometimes I'm not like that. But I've been beside him for I don't know how long, sometimes I wonder if he's just taking me for granted, or sometimes it was just my foolish heart who still clings to the hope that there will be us. Even if not now, but someday.

My mind drifts so far away that I didn’t even notice my stomach churning.

I sighed and close my eyes for a moment and when I opened it, blaze is already sitting in front of me, looking at me, the way he looks at me this morning.

“What are you doing here?”

“I noticed you’re not in the cafeteria, so I thought you must be in here.” He smirks “And I was right.”

“How did you know that I am here?”

“I observed things, Corinne. So many things.” He pointed on his head “It’s all bottled up inside this huge sanctuary here.”

There goes his deepness again.

I chuckled “I thought you only had a big d**k. I guess you have a big brain too." I didn't know that I said that, after I regretted that I said that.

His smile grew bigger that almost his dimples pop out “You have that engraved on your mind, right baby girl?”

“Ge a hold of yourself.” I start to drew sketches to hide my embarrassment.

A granola bar is swiped on my paper and I looked up at him. “You should eat. I noticed your barely eating.”

“How long have you’ve been watching me?”

“Since the incident last winter” He shrugs as my heart thumps. He’s watching me because he doesn’t trust me.

“Getting tabs, are we?”

“Off course.” He smiles “After I figured out how crazy you are, I think I should put you on a leash and a gag, at least.”

Is he flirting with me?

But I can’t deny that it is working.

One-time thing, Corinne. One-time thing.

"If only I knew you were this clingy after a one-night stand, I shouldn't have slept with you." I told him while I am opening up the Granola bar and took a bite, and that pleased him.

“It’s because I wanted more.”

“More of what?” f**k this, now he wants a relationship? Is she goddamn crazy?

“More of that mind-blowing sex.” He shrugs as he put his arms around his chest and I can see the full sleeves tattoos he have, I noticed that there’s a flower and a thorn on it, he’s left full sleeve is full of Roses and thorns.

“What’s that about?” I pointed on his tattoo and he look at it.

“Ah, this. A roses and thorns, I guess.”

“I know it’s Roses and thorns. But why chose a tattoo like that?”

It’s a norm that people don’t like the Roses thorns, it made them bleed. But for me, it’s funny that the most objectified beautiful flower in the world such as the rose, and a sign of love and endearment has a thorn that will surely made someone bleed.

"It was the favorite flower of the one who raised me after my Mom died after giving birth to me. I heard that she revived my Mother's Rose dome that had been neglected since she died. When I grew up, I noticed that she likes to pick Roses whenever she sees them, sometimes, I saw that her fingers were bleeding because of its thorns, but I didn't ask her. It wasn't my business after all." He sighed "One day I came home from school, bloodied because I got into a fight at school because I was angry with one of my classmates who was with his mother in the Mother’s Day program." He chuckled as he relieved the memory "Maybe I was jealous, I don't know. But my teacher and the school principal talked to my Father and of course the one who raised me was with him, since she is my guardian. From what I gathered, the principal said that he thinks I have a brain disease that needs to be taken care of and that I'm different from the normal kids at that school." He nods, I stopped myself from holding his hand, because even if it's true that he has a mental illness, that's not the way older people should approach and treat him. Especially when he’s just a little boy at that time. "When we got home, my Father booked an appointment with a psychiatrist, taking the advice of the principal. But the one who raised me did something, and it is what calms me until now when my mind is consumed by too much darkness, she held up one piece of Rose in front of me , she asked me if I find that Rose beautiful, and I said yes instantly, because the rose is really beautiful and there’s something in it that made you look and engulfed the view, she removed her hand that was around the stem of the Rose and saw that her palm was bleeding, she told me that Rose is a very beautiful and magical flower and yet others still avoid it because of its thorny thorns. And I remembered I asked her why not her? And she said; We don't deserve the beauty of something if we don't accept all of it. She told me that no matter how beautiful the Rose is, some don’t like its thorn and they removed it before giving it to someone they love. And those who don't like its thorny stems are those who don't want to risk something worth the pain." He smiled, and what he's saying is beautiful too, what he's saying makes sense to me, in a very twisted way. "She told me that I am like a Rose. She said that I am a very beautiful boy, and the thorns of the Rose are my flaws that she is sure everyone has. She told me that someday, someone will appreciate those Thorns. and will take the risk of getting hurt because of me." He clicks his tongue and suddenly he's back at me again "That's the story of this tattoo."

“That’s—” I am at lost for words.

“Beautiful? Yeah, it is.” He nods, so pleased with his story.

“I meant to say, twisted yet wonderful.”

He looks at me intently.

I swallow the lump that builds on my throat “Maybe Gian was the one who is so willing to take that risk for you, and yet—” I looked at him as he’s waiting for me to finished what I’m about to say.

“Killed her?”

I nod “Yeah. That girl is in love with you.”

He shakes his head “I just told you, I didn’t date her. Didn’t even touch her.”

We hold our gaze for a second, he’s nothing but true to me for the past days?

What if he’s telling the truth?

But no, I known Gian for three years, and I just know him just now.

“Are you still regretting that you slept with me?”

“Yep. Positive.” I sighed and starts sketching.

“At least you make Diesel a fool earlier. For him being an asshole.” He leans his arms on my table.

“How did you know that I am in love with Diesel?”

“Because I can see it, in your eyes. The way you looked at him, the way you smiled with him, the way you watched him when you thought no one was watching.”

“Aren’t you a stalker or something?” I chuckled, and I put in me again, because I can feel myself getting comfortable with the Angry God.

"Don't ever admit your feelings to him." He looks serious.

“What?”

"No matter what happens, even if your jealousy eats you or your emotions gets you carried away. Don't ever admit to him what you really feel." His eyes were dark as he looked at me, no. More on looking at my soul.

“Why though?”

“Save yourself.”

I swallowed hard at the intensity of this conversation, I know some of the students that are inside the library too were watching us. But I am sure no one would hear a thing.

“I think I might kiss you again.”

Under the table the I tighten the grip on my skirt, but my face I can comfortably say that I did the best I could to hide my eagerness to kiss him back too. “What happened between us is just a one time-thing.”

He leans even more closer to me and I can smell the faint smell of cigarette and coffee again. “Says who, baby girl?”

“Says me.” I answered him confidently.

He smirks in front of my face and looks down on my lips as he bit his bottom lip. f**k, he’s teasing me.

“We’ll see.”

I was caught off guard when he swipes out of my table my sketchpad and starts looking at my sketch.

My pad is full of twisted and dark sketches. That’s my thing. I like to sketch and sculp or paint the modesty of life and people, but more on people.

I like my art to capture the people’s feelings during that. Like for example, I sketch about two people having s*x. I think that’s one of my favorites.

The connection between two people having s*x, getting vulnerable and wild together.

Blaze smiles “You’re very talented.”

“Thanks.” I get my sketchpad from his hold and closed it.

“I heard there’s an upcoming live painting session in your art class next week?”

I cringe “How the f**k did you know that?”

"Because almost all of your classmates in art class are pestering me to be, they’re live model." He smiled arrogantly. Of course, they are. Because Blaze is called God here on campus. And I'm not going to lie, it's really nice to paint or sculpt Blaze because of his fine body and gorgeous face.

I sighed in defeat “What is it to you?”

“I might say yes to you.”

“Why are you helping me though, did you forget that I almost kill you.” I snap.

“Almost.” He nods.

I sighed again and massage my temple “I might invite Diesel.”

His feature change from being cocky to pissed off? I think.

“Okay.”

“And one more thing, Blaze. We can’t be this casual.”

“Why? Because I killed her?” he stood up, towering above me.

I nod “Yes, and I still don’t trust you.”

He nods “For your peace of mind.” He put both of his hands on his front slacks pocket “I am going to investigate her death.”

I was caught off guard and I gaped my mouth open, I didn’t expect this “What?”

“You heard me.”

We both looks at each other, yet again.

“What do you want, Blaze?”

“You.”

Without further ado, he strides outside the library as if it was his own.

Maybe it’s his.