An Affair With His Virgin Nanny

MAMA

REINA

I can’t stop thinking of how happy Alan seemed when he left for work today. For some reason, that happiness fuels my day, keeps a smile on my face as well. I know it’s ridiculous, but I can’t help it.

“Hey E,” I call out to Ethan, looking up from my phone. “It’s a few days to Christmas already. Okay, weeks. It’s two weeks to Christmas. What’s something you’ve always wanted?”

I never know if he’d talk to me, but I never shy away from trying.

I just got refunded a debt, and Ethan’s officially been added to my gifting list. As for Alan… I don’t know if he’d appreciate anything I’d give to him.

“E?” I drawl in a sing song when he doesn’t respond. I even scoot closer to him, as we’re both sitting on his bed.

He looks up from his coloring book. I notice his eyes has gotten dimmer, glassier. Gasping, I drop my phone.

“E? Come here.” I pull him to me and he wraps his arms around me without hesitation. He doesn’t shake or make crying noises, but his tears drench the front of my uniform.

My heart squeezes for him. In no time, moisture gathers in my own eyes and I can’t fight the tears. I don’t.

The tears roll down my cheeks, and I wipe them before they can drop onto his shirt. We stay like this for minutes until he finally pulls away and wipes at his eyes.

He doesn’t say anything. I don’t force him to. We just sit in silence, while he continues to color on his coloring book.

“Mama used to buy me gifts every week until Christmas Day.” He starts, his voice low and coarse as usual. I swallow the biggest lump in my throat. “She used to ask me to write the most gigantic wishlist ever, and see if there’s anything she wouldn’t get for me. I never liked to waste her money…” The side of his lips curls up a little, but he still doesn’t look up at me.

“She always wants me to, but I always pick the little things. She needs the money for the hospital. I heard her say the drugs are expensive one time. She still got me expensive gifts, she always knew exactly what I want. She’s the best mama ever, I wish she never died.”

It’s the longest he’s ever spoken for. I sniff, completely broken, turning away to wipe my tears. I really don’t need him seeing this right now. I have to be strong for my E.

“I’m so sorry about your mama, my love. I’m so sorry.” I mutter, my throat closing up as I speak. I scoot closer to run my fingers through his pretty curls. Ethan finally looks up at me. “I know I can never come close to being like your mama, and I promise, I’m not going to try to take her place. She was, and will always be your mama. I just want to be here for you now. As long as I can. I don’t want you to be sad anymore. I want you to be happy, tell me whatever you want… I know I might not be able to get everything. I’m not that rich, really.” We both laugh at the last sentence.

I go on, “But I’m willing to make you happy in the little ways I can. If you’ll let me, baby.”

Ethan watches me for a while, then nods slowly.

I smile, wide enough for it to be contagious. It works, his lips curl upward with a smile of his own.

“Great! Now, enough with the tears,” I grab his face gently and properly wipe at his tears. “What do you want for Christmas, big boy?”

“A surprise.” He says at once. I raise a brow, confused. “Mama was never able to surprise me. She’s bad at surprises and I love snooping. I want to see you try, Reina.”

I chuckle. “Is that a threat? Seems like you don’t believe I can surprise you.”

He drops his coloring book and properly faces me. I turn to face him better too, excitement running through my veins.

“Girls are bad at surprises. Only dad has ever surprised me.”

“Well. Add me to the list. I’ll be sure to prove you wrong.”

His grin widens, and I wink.

“Anything else?”

He doesn’t hesitate. “Christmas decorations.” He gets up to his feet at once and heads to his wardrobe. My brows furrows together.

“What are you looking for?”

“Coming!”

So I wait, confused but intrigued at the same time. He finally leaves the wardrobe with a card in hand. He bounces towards me, a big smile on his face.

“I have a black card… Dad gave it to me. It doesn’t have a limit. You can buy the decorations with the card, I haven’t used it in a while.” He says.

I don’t take it from him, a bit confused. “Uh… are you sure about this?”

He sighs. “Of course. I’m afraid to ask dad about the decorations, but maybe he’d like it if we try?”

Uh… I don’t know about that… But why did I actually want to try?

Oh, I’m definitely getting fired on this job.

I finally take the card. “I’d have to ask your dad first, E.”

His expression morphs into a frown.

“Dad will say no. It’s okay if you can’t do it.” He picks up his coloring book and continues coloring. My mouth is a bit open. Was that gaslighting I just clocked?

“Wow, is that how bad you want me fired? Wow. And here I thought you liked me.” I fold my arms over my chest dramatically.

Crickets.

Ethan says nothing else to me. I know he’s just being spoilt at this point and refusing to see reason with me, but at the same time, I get why he doesn’t want his dad to know about this.

Alan’s a killjoy, even to his own child without knowing. Hands down the grumpiest man I know, and I know a lot of men from the jobs I’ve done to earn a living.

I take a deep breath. “Fine. I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thanks.” He mumbles after a while. I can tell he’s already taken his mind off the decorations, convinced I can’t make it happen. I stare at the black card for minutes, trying to make up my mind.

Later that day, I’m in the kitchen with Thelma and she’s blabbing about how much women love Alan.

“He’s literally every woman’s dream! And his wife, Ma’am Rose was a perfect match for him. She was prim and proper and really gorgeous too. Why do the beautiful ones die so early? She didn’t deserve that.”

I shake my head in disagreement. “No one deserves death, Thelma.”

She rolls her eyes. “You don’t have to always be a goody two shoes, you know.”

“I don’t, I’m just being considerate.”

“And I’m not. Sweet. You know, I would have kicked your ass out of this kitchen if you weren’t helping me out.” She says, pausing the dishes to glare daggers at me.

I smile, trying to lighten the mood. “I’d line up see you try.”

I take the next dish from her and stack it on the racks. She doesn’t say anything more.

Suddenly recalling my deal with Ethan, I decide to ask her, “Is Al—Mr King really against decorations?”

She shrugs. “I don’t know. They’ve never really done much. Ma’am Rose used to just get a Christmas tree with a few gifts underneath, because I guess she knows Mr King doesn’t favor much items hanging around. Ever since she died two years ago though… there’s never been a tree in this house.”

Sadness and even anger burns hot in the pit of my stomach.

“So how does Ethan get his gifts?”

“His dad hands it to him and tells him merry Christmas. Asks him whether to take him out for Christmas but he always turns it down. I don’t blame the little boy, all Mr King ever does on an outing is type on his phone.” She sighs.

I bite my bottom lip, pausing with the plate in my hand. Okay, so he’d definitely say no.

“Why did you ask?”

I snap back to reality at the sound of Thelma’s voice.

Shaking my head, I reply, “No reason. Just curious.”