Blood of Ash

Chapter 6: Asher POV

I wasn't avoiding her exactly. I mean, yes. I tried to avoid seeing her, but I was surprised and didn't know what to do. She had questions, I know. However, I couldn't answer them yet. She had to tell me the truth before I could answer them.

A week from when she started to frenzy, I was waiting by her locker for her. I knew she had been depressed since I had withdrawn and I wanted her to smile again. She saw me and I both felt and smelled her fear and excitement. I swallowed the lump in my throat and said, "Hey, Bells."

She whimpered and all of a sudden I felt a hard yank on our bond. I had to fight the urge to run over and kiss her. It's all I ever wanted to do, but she had to feel the same way. I couldn't force my feelings on her. She smiled sweetly like she knew what she had done to me, and said, "Hey, Ash."

She refused to look at me after that as she went through her locker. "Bells. Why won't you look at me?"

She closed the door and leaned her head against it. "Did I imagine everything?"

"What do you mean," I questioned nervously.

She whispered, "Did I imagine what happened last Friday?" I shook my head. "Then why wouldn't you talk about it?"

I smiled weakly. "I can't talk about it yet, Bells."

She growled, actually growled, at me, before storming away.

I tugged the bond and screamed my feelings at her in my head, but if course she couldn't hear me. I sighed and sat on the ground in front of her locker. She had never been that angry with me. I had no idea what to do, but I knew I had to get her to forgive me. The warning bell pierced through and I headed towards the music room.

I spent the entire day watching Bella. There was something different about her and it was harder than ever to keep myself from telling her everything. I was waiting for her by her locker once again at the end of the day. She looked at me as if to say "you did this to me" and asked, "What do you want, Asher?"

I flinched. She never called me Asher and she never spoke to me with that tone of voice. "Bells, please. Let's just walk home and we can talk."

"What is there to talk about," she whimpered.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, gently smelling her affection. Wait. Affection? She hates me right now. I waited for the people around us to leave and whispered under my breath, "Everything."

She sighed. "Fine. We can talk." I motioned for her to lead the way. As she walked she asked, "Why have you been avoiding me?"

I winced. "I wasn't avoiding you."

She peeked at me under her lashes. "Then where were you?"

I ran my fingers through my hair again. "Bells, I was at home trying to figure out what to say to you for the last couple days."

"And the rest of the week?"

I whimpered. "They told me there's nothing they can do for her." She looked very confused. "Sophia. They couldn't save her."

She immediately whirled around and hugged me hard. I smiled sadly and hugged her back as she murmured apologies and condolences. I pressed my lips to the top of her head and breathed in her scent, allowing it wash over and calm me.

She looked up at me and said something even I couldn't hear, but through the bond I felt sadness and love. The wind gently blew around us, rustling the leaves in the tree and picking up her hair, blowing it around. I gently tucked her hair out of her face and glanced at her lips. They looked so soft and sweet. She parted them slightly like she was going to say something. Before I could talk myself out of it, I slowly leaned down and pressed my lips against hers, giving her plenty of time to pull away.

I was right. They were soft and lush and definitely sweet. I pulled away a lot sooner than I wanted to and looked into her eyes. Her eyes were sparkling and I felt her excitement and confusion through the bond.

I let her go reluctantly and sheepishly said, "I'm sorry, Bells."

A flash of hurt crossed her eyes. "Oh. No. I understand."

She started to walk away and I sighed knowing she misunderstood. I followed her waiting for her to say something, but she never did. She didn't even give the opportunity to say goodnight when we got to her house. I swore out loud and headed to my house. It was almost identical to Bella's as was my room. We had picked out our decorations and stuff together and had done just about everything together since we met.

I had just laid back on my bed and was staring at my ceiling when I felt her pain. The bond was getting stronger. I always knew what she was feeling, but I had never felt it like it was my own like this. It was stupid of me to kiss her. I knew I should've waited, but she looked so beautiful. I absolutely messed everything up.

knock knock knock

I groaned as the door opened and Alex poked his head in. He was 17 with jet black hair and olive skin. He looked at me and said, "Is something wrong with Bellalyse?"

I sat up and looked at him. "What have you heard?"

He shook his head and huffed, "Actually, I haven't heard anything other than she's acting upset. Why?"

I groaned and laid back down. "I did something stupid today."

He laughed at me. "You do something stupid every day."

I looked him dead in the eyes and said, "I kissed her."

"Okay? How is that stupid?" Groaning, I explained about having avoided her and apologizing and everything else that had happened. "Oh. Yeah. That was pretty stupid. Why don't you go over there and try and explain?"

"She's too hurt. Even if I tried, she wouldn't see me."

He thought for a few minutes. "Well, I guess you'll just have to make her see you. Couldn't you try communicating through that bond you were telling me about?"

I shrugged. "The bond is impossible to hide things in at the moment. She hasn't figured out how to use it or what it is. So, it's like she's shouting at me without even knowing she's talking to me, but at the same time, it seems like she has a block up so I can't hear her. I don't want to confuse her or make her feel like I'm tricking her by using it."

He nodded. "Well, I'm going to go text Em. She was just concerned. I'm sure you'll figure it out."

I nodded and refused to go downstairs the entire weekend. It was torture knowing I had hurt her and not knowing how to fix it.