Only Human

Chapter 12

Sunday morning after breakfast, I get ready to go shopping with Ruby and Flash. By the time I’m dressed, Alec is still sound asleep, snoring softly. I put his breakfast in the fridge, scribble him a quick note, and head out the door.

When I arrive at the mall, Ruby and Flash are waiting for me outside Stella’s Formal Fashion. As soon as I spot them, I run toward them and wrap them in a hug. It feels like I never see them anymore. I know that’s part of growing up, but it doesn’t make me miss them any less.

We head into the shop, picking out clothes to try on. The store has only just opened, so it’s almost empty. Lucky for us—we claim the plush red lounges in front of the change rooms all to ourselves.

While Flash is in the dressing room trying on a suit, Ruby and I sit side by side on the lounge.

“So, I got the memo about the prom theme,” Ruby says, grinning. “I love it! And a little birdie told me it was your idea.”

I nod, smiling, though part of me is still distracted. I’m trying to enjoy my time with them, but my parents are still heavy on my mind. I don’t know why I’m letting it get to me so much. I shouldn’t be surprised by them anymore.

Ruby nudges me.

“Sorry, Ruby—yes, it was. But I can’t take all the credit. I had a little help from a new friend I made. Felicity.”

Ruby raises a questioning eyebrow. “Felicity Clarke?”

I nod.

“As in Dean’s cousin? Felicity, who’s dating your ex?”

I keep nodding. “Yep. That’s the one. How do you know all this, Ruby?”

She shakes her head and gives me a playful push on the forehead. “Better question—how don’t you know this?”

I laugh. “Not all of us keep up with the school gossip. I had no idea who she was until we went for milkshakes at the diner and Dean walked in.”

Ruby lets out a loud laugh, quickly clapping her hand over her mouth to stifle it. Flash pops his head out of the curtain, grinning.

“Oh Jess, your life is far more interesting than mine!”

We’re all laughing now.

“Well, Ruby,” I tease, “if you were on prom committee, you could’ve given me the heads-up!”

Flash comes out in his suit, looking sharp. “Yes! And she was supposed to meet me that night, but she bailed on me too!”

He sits down beside me, linking his arm with mine. “So, what do you have to say for yourself?”

Before I can answer, Ruby jumps up, eyes sparkling.

“Matthew Goodwin asked me to prom!”

She squeals and starts bouncing up and down. Flash and I leap to our feet and smother her in hugs.

“Oh my God! Since when are you two a thing?” I ask.

Ruby pulls us back onto the lounge, her cheeks glowing. “We bumped into each other during a college campus visit a few weeks ago. We’ve been texting since. On Friday, right after the bell, he asked me out for ice cream. You understand, right, Jess?”

I smile, placing my hand on her shoulder. “Of course I do.”

I’d be a hypocrite to say otherwise. I’ve ditched them plenty of times for Alec. I glance over at Flash.

“Well, looks like it’s just me and you then.”

Flash’s face twists awkwardly. He looks at Ruby, then back at me, clearly torn.

“You have a date too?” I ask.

He clasps his hands together, almost in prayer. “Don’t hate me, Jess. I’ve been meaning to tell you. Things have just been so busy. I’m sorry.”

I shake my head. I shouldn’t be mad at them. They’re my best friends—I should be happy for them. Still, a pang of jealousy cuts through me. I have a boyfriend I can’t tell anyone about. A boyfriend I can’t go to prom with. And now I have to go alone.

They both look worried, like they’re bracing for me to blow up. I take a deep breath. Be happy for them, Jess.

“Don’t be sorry. I’m happy for you guys. Really. I’ll find someone to go with—or I’ll go solo. It’s fine.”

Ruby doesn’t look convinced. She hugs me tight. “You can always third-wheel with me.”

“Uh, thanks but no thanks. I’d rather go solo!”

We laugh, hugging it out again, until I suddenly pull back and squint at Flash.

“Wait a minute. Who are you going with?”

His smile turns sheepish. He fiddles with his buttons. “Uh… Ryan Phillips.”

My jaw drops. Ruby and I exchange a look, then squeal and tackle him in hugs.

“Flash, that’s amazing!” I say.

He beams. “I figured it was about time. I don’t want to go to college in the closet. This is me.”

I hug him tighter. “That’s right. And you’re perfect.”

---

We shop for hours but nothing feels right—until I spot it. A dress in the window, glowing like it was waiting just for me.

“That’s it,” I whisper. “That’s the dress.”

After I buy it, and Ruby and Flash find theirs, we grab lunch. I tell them about my parents, about Dean, and about Flick. They comfort me, but also tell me, annoyingly, that I should talk to my parents. I’m not ready. Not yet.

When I get home, Alec is on the couch with his laptop.

“Working on your webpage again?” I ask.

He looks up, flashing that sexy smile that always makes my knees weak. “No. A friend of mine and Finn’s—Don, he’s in real estate—asked me to check out their website.”

I kiss his cheek. “That’s great! See? I told you you’re good at this.”

Before I can pull away, he catches me, pulling me into a deeper kiss, one that makes my heart ache like I’ve been gone for days.

Then my phone vibrates. Flick.

“Hey Flick,” I answer, pulling back as Alec groans in annoyance.

He rolls his eyes and turns back to his laptop. I laugh silently at his sulk.

“Hey Jess,” Flick chirps, “how are you feeling? I was thinking about you all day yesterday—even Dean asked how you were.”

“Well, I’ll let you break the news to him that I’m alive.”

She giggles.

“So, are you free today? Want to come over? We can start on that Sydney Harbour Bridge model for prom. I got all the stuff already.”

I glance at Alec. He’s mouthing “No,” his jaw tight.

“Why not?” I mouth back.

Flick continues, “It gets boring at Dean’s. I don’t have many friends here yet.”

Oh right. She lives with Dean. My stomach twists, but I can’t stomach going back to my parents’ house either.

“Sure, Flick. I’ll come over. Can’t believe you bought everything already.”

She squeals with excitement. “Yay! See you soon!”

When I hang up, Alec is glaring daggers.

“Are you serious, Jess? You’re not going to that house.”

“Don’t start. We’re working on the model for prom. It’s not like I can bring her here.”

He stands, angry now. “What about your parents’ place? They live on the same street.”

“I’m not going to that house.”

“You’re acting like a child,” he snaps. “Grow up. People get divorced. Marriages fall apart.”

I laugh bitterly. “That’s rich, coming from someone who still hasn’t forgiven his dad for leaving his mom.”

His face hardens. In a flash, his fist slams through the thin lounge-room wall. Blood streaks his knuckles. My chest freezes.

He steps toward me, and for the first time ever, I feel scared of Alec.

He points a finger at me, fury blazing. “How dare you! My mother was dying when my father left. He abandoned us in debt. We lost everything. You? Your parents split and left you with a house. You’re a spoiled brat. Don’t you ever talk about my mother again!”

He motions to the door. “Go. Go hang out with your new friends in that house with the douchebag who treated you like dirt. But don’t bother coming back here.”

He storms down the hall, slamming the bedroom door.

I stand frozen, tears streaming down my face. Maybe I pushed too far. Maybe bringing up his mother was cruel. But the way he just treated me—no. I can’t excuse it.

I grab my things and leave.

---

When I pull up at Dean’s, Flick runs out to meet me.

“Jess!” She hugs me. “What’s wrong? Is it your parents?”

I shake my head. “No. Fight with my boyfriend. It’s… not my week.”

Her face softens. “Stay here tonight. We’ll go to school together tomorrow. Please?”

Alec’s words echo in my head. Don’t come back here. Maybe he meant it. Maybe he didn’t. Either way, I’m not going to my parents.

“Okay,” I smile weakly. “Sounds good.”

Flick jumps with joy. “Yay! We’ll work on the bridge, quote books, and watch sappy romances!”

She drags me inside. The Clarke house smells incredible—roast chicken, garlic, rosemary. Lisa is cooking. She’s stunning, a mirror of Dean in female form.

“Ah, Jessica Taylor,” she greets warmly, kissing both my cheeks. “No wonder you had such an effect on my son.”

Flick and I exchange puzzled looks. Effect? If she means being Dean’s emotional punching bag, sure.

Lisa agrees to let me stay. Flick squeals, doing her little happy dance.

---

Upstairs, Flick shows me her room—bright, pink, girly. “It used to be Dean’s sister Catherine’s, but she’s at college now. So it’s mine until next year.”

We work on the Harbour Bridge model, laughing until a slam rattles the walls. Dean. Then stomping. Then shouting.

“Dean Michael Clarke! We are not finished!”

Flick winces. “That’ll be Uncle John. He and Dean work together on weekends. They fight… a lot.”

Hours pass. We finish the model, clean up, then head down to dinner.

The tension at the table is thick. John grills Dean about grades and Bonnie, insisting he should take her to prom. Dean finally explodes, throwing down his cutlery.

“I told you! I don’t want to be with Bonnie!”

The table shakes as John slams his fist down. Lisa hisses at him to stop, embarrassed. Dean’s fists clench. He looks ready to break. And for the first time, I feel like I understand Dean Clarke.

He’s angry because he’s trapped.

---

Dinner drags. I excuse myself when my phone rings—Alec.

“Jess?” His voice is raw.

“I’m here.”

“When are you coming home?”

“You told me not to. So I’m staying with Flick tonight.”

A crash echoes on his end. “No, you’re not! Come home so we can talk.”

“You’re still angry. I’m not coming back until you calm down.”

“Me? Calm down? Look who’s talking!”

Tears well in my eyes. “Alec… I thought you were going to hit me today.”

Silence. Then: “What?”

“When you walked toward me. I felt unsafe. I don’t ever want to feel like that again.”

“Baby, no. I’d never hurt you.”

“I’ll talk to you later. Not tonight.”

“Jess, wait—”

I hang up, turning off my phone with shaking hands.

“Who was going to hit you?”

I jump. Dean is in the doorway, eyes blazing.

He storms closer. “Was that your boyfriend? Has he hurt you?”

“No! We just fought.”

“I heard what you said.”

“I thought he might. He didn’t.”

Dean’s jaw flexes. “You’re Flick’s friend. Besides… I don’t hate you, Taylor. I wouldn’t want anyone hurting you.”

For once, I believe him.

---

That night, Flick lends me Dean’s shirt and a pair of briefs. I feel ridiculous, and if Alec knew, he’d flip. Flick laughs until tears roll down her cheeks, and I strut like a catwalk model to make her laugh harder.

We spend the night quoting books, watching Wuthering Heights, swooning over Tom Hardy. At some point I fall asleep.

When I wake and slip to the bathroom, I run straight into Dean. He’s in nothing but briefs, leaning against his doorway with that cocky half-smile.

Heat floods my face. I yank at the hem of my shirt, but it’s white—and I’m not wearing a bra. The realisation has me reddening in embarrassment.

His eyes linger. My heart races.

I bolt.

Back in Flick’s room, I bury myself under the blanket, mortified. But no matter how hard I try to push it away, I can’t shake the image of Dean Clarke standing there, half-naked, smirking at me like he knows exactly what effect he’s having.

Jess, pull yourself together. You love Alec.

But as I drift back to sleep, it isn’t Alec’s face in my mind.

It’s Dean’s.