Before December

Chapter 6

Lying in bed, I found myself wondering why James had been in the kitchen at four in the morning. Maybe he couldn't sleep either. Maybe he'd had a nightmare, although hopefully his hadn't involved Theodore. For a house this enormous, it was strangely quiet most of the time. Apart from Theodore and his apparent determination to make sure everyone within a five-mile radius could hear his music, I rarely heard much of anything. No doors constantly opening and closing, no television blaring from downstairs, no Dad shouting up the stairs to ask if anyone wanted takeout. The silence should have been peaceful, but instead it only made me notice how different everything was and how much I missed home. I scrolled through photos of my family on my phone until eventually my eyes grew too heavy to keep open and exhaustion pulled me back to sleep.

At eight o'clock, raised voices outside my bedroom dragged me awake. I buried my head beneath the pillow and tried to ignore them, but the arguing only became louder.

I heard James first. "You could at least try to explain yourself."

"And you'd listen?" Theodore snapped back.

"I'd try."

Theo gave a humourless laugh. "Sure."

"Boys, it's eight o'clock in the morning. Keep your voices down. Lydia is probably still asleep!"

Celeste.

Curiosity got the better of me, so I pushed the covers away and crossed the room. When I opened my bedroom door, Celeste was standing between Theodore and James. James's jaw was tight and his arms rigid at his sides as he stared at Theo, while Theo stood opposite him with his shoulders tense and his fists clenched.

"At least I don't spend my time making people feel like they aren't welcome here," James snapped.

Theo's expression hardened. "Do you really think I care about the invader in the house? She doesn't belong here! She'll never belong here!"

James noticed me first. The anger on his face gave way to alarm, and Celeste followed his gaze before Theodore did the same. His eyes met mine, but there was no apology in them. If anything, his jaw tightened as though he was prepared to stand by every word.

I wasn't going to let him see that his words had hurt, but I wasn't going to take it either. "I know I don't belong here!" I snapped, although my voice cracked despite my best efforts. "You think I want to be here?"

Theo stared at me without saying anything.

"You don't know anything about me, so stop acting like you do. You're an egotistical asshole who only thinks about himself."

Something unreadable passed across his face before he turned and stormed into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him. I did exactly the same, shutting mine just as I heard Celeste call after me.

"Lydia, he didn't mean it, he—"

I didn't want to hear it. Why should she have to apologise for Theodore and his big stupid mouth anyway? I threw myself face-first onto the bed and screamed into my pillow. The tears still didn't come. I hadn't cried since they died. Since then, everything had felt strangely distant, as though my life was happening around me while I stood somewhere outside of it watching, but right then I finally felt something properly.

I was angry at Theodore for acting like I'd deliberately invaded his life. Angry at Uncle Will for sending me halfway across the world instead of letting me stay with him. Angry at my friends for disappearing when I needed them most. Angry at a world that had somehow continued as normal while mine had fallen apart. Mostly, I was angry because there was nothing I could do to change any of it.

I shoved my headphones over my ears and turned the music up, hoping it might block everything else out, but Theodore's words kept pushing their way back into my head. He'd said I didn't belong here, and the worst part was that some part of me already believed him.

Home wasn't this enormous house with its chandeliers, swimming pool and endless rooms. Home was my bedroom in Los Angeles. Home was Mom complaining about the mess in the kitchen, Dad insisting he knew a shortcut and somehow getting us lost every single time, and my little sister sneaking into my room and stealing things she knew weren't hers. Those things had once annoyed me, but now I would have given anything to have them back.

This place wasn't home, and these people weren't my people. Right then, I couldn't imagine that ever changing.

"Lydia."

I barely registered the sound through my headphones.

"Lydia!"

Something moved at the edge of my vision and I finally looked up to see Celeste standing at the foot of my bed.

"MISS WILD!"

I pulled my headphones down around my neck and lowered the volume. "Sorry."

"I did knock."

"Sorry. I didn't hear you."

Her expression softened as she sat beside me. "I just wanted to check on you."

"I'm fine," I replied automatically.

The look she gave me made it obvious she didn't believe me. "Theodore shouldn't have said what he did."

I shrugged and picked at a loose thread on the duvet. "Doesn't matter."

"It clearly does."

Celeste placed her hand gently over mine. "He's angry."

"With me?"

"No." She hesitated. "Not really."

"Then why does he act like he hates me?"

Celeste sighed. "Theo has a habit of taking whatever he's feeling and aiming it at the nearest person."

"Lucky me."

A small smile appeared on her face. "James was angry with him about something else entirely. Your name came into the argument, and Theo said something he shouldn't have."

"He called me an invader."

"I know."

I looked down at my hands. "Maybe he's right."

"He isn't."

"I'm a stranger living in his house."

"You're a young woman who's been brought here because circumstances changed. Those are very different things."

I hesitated before asking, "Do they know?"

Celeste frowned. "Know what, dear?"

"What happened to my family?"

Understanding crossed her face and she shook her head. "No. Mrs Henderson thought it was best for you to speak about them when you're ready."

That answer left a strange ache in my chest. Theodore had no idea why I was really there or what had happened before I arrived. It didn't excuse the way he treated me, but at least I knew he wasn't deliberately throwing my grief in my face.

I looked down at where Celeste's hand still covered mine. "I don't have anyone here."

"You have me, dear."

Something inside me softened and, before I could overthink it, I leaned over and hugged her. Celeste wrapped her arms around me immediately, warm and reassuring, and for a few seconds I allowed myself to stay there.

When I pulled away, she smiled. "Now, would you like something to eat, or are you planning on sleeping until dinner?"

A small laugh escaped me. "Breakfast would be great."

"I'll bring something up."

She squeezed my arm before leaving.

Once she'd gone, I decided a shower might make me feel vaguely human again. I grabbed a fresh towel, picked up my toiletries and headed into the hallway, carefully counting the doors so there was no chance of ending up in Theodore's bedroom again.

Apparently, counting doors didn't solve all my problems. The moment I opened the bathroom door, I stopped dead. Someone was already in the shower, and although the frosted glass blurred everything behind it, I could clearly make out the shape of a person.

"Oh my God. Sorry!"

I covered my eyes and began backing towards the door. The shower stopped behind me, followed by movement and the sound of the shower door opening.

Someone cleared his throat. "You planning on staying?"

My stomach dropped.

Theodore.

Of course it was Theodore.

I darted into the hallway and pulled the bathroom door shut behind me, then leaned back against it and closed my eyes. Before I'd even had time to move, the door suddenly opened and I stumbled backwards with a startled yelp. I expected to hit the floor, but two hands caught me beneath my arms.

I straightened quickly and turned around to find Theo standing behind me, his hair still wet from the shower and a towel wrapped securely around his waist. My eyes dropped briefly before travelling back up to his face, where an amused expression told me he'd noticed exactly where I'd been looking and was enjoying my embarrassment far too much.

"This is becoming a habit," he said.

I gulped. "What is?"

"You walking in on me."

That snapped me out of whatever daze I'd fallen into. "I was looking for the bathroom!"

"You found it."

"I didn't know you were in there."

His mouth curved into that irritating smirk. "If you wanted to join me in the shower, Wild, you could've just asked."

I stared at him in disbelief. After everything he'd said earlier that morning, he actually had the nerve to stand there looking pleased with himself.

"In your dreams, Theodore."

"It's Theo."

"I know."

"Then use it."

I folded my arms. "No. If you get to call me Wild, I get to call you Theodore."

His smirk widened. "Suit yourself, Wild."

"Gladly, Theodore."

He gave me one last amused look before walking towards his bedroom, completely unbothered by the fact that he was wandering around in nothing but a towel. Somehow, he'd still managed to make me feel like the embarrassed one. The moment his door closed, I disappeared into the bathroom and locked the door.

When I returned to my bedroom after showering, my bed had been made and a breakfast tray waited on top of it, with a steaming mug of coffee on the bedside table. I smiled, knowing Celeste had been responsible. Sitting cross-legged on the bed, I pulled the tray towards me and stared at the ridiculous amount of food she'd prepared. Bacon, eggs, sausages, beans and toast filled almost every inch of the plate. Apparently, the British believed breakfast should feed a small army, but it tasted good enough that I ate nearly all of it.

Afterwards, I checked the weather app and looked through the window. It was going to be another hot day, so I pulled on ripped blue denim shorts and a black tank top, with my black bikini underneath in case I decided to use the pool later. I had just picked up the hair dryer when someone knocked on my bedroom door.

"Come in."

James stepped inside, looking slightly hesitant. "Hi."

"Hi."

"Mum's coming home this afternoon from her business trip. She'd like to meet you properly." An awkward smile appeared on his face. "Preferably without anyone getting thrown up on."

My face immediately heated. "Oh my God. Is everyone going to keep bringing that up forever?"

"Probably."

"Great."

James laughed. "Don't worry. Mum thought it was funny."

"That makes one of us."

He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Have you, uh, got plans this morning?"

"Not really. I was thinking about swimming." I glanced towards the remains of my breakfast. "Probably should after everything Celeste just fed me."

James laughed. "Yeah, she doesn't really understand small portions."

"I noticed."

He hesitated before asking, "I might join you, if that's okay?"

I smiled. "Sure. I'd like that."

His expression brightened. "Great. See you downstairs."

James disappeared into the hallway, leaving my bedroom door open behind him. I stared after him, thinking about how strange it was that two brothers raised in the same house could be so completely different. Theodore seemed determined to remind me that I didn't belong there, while James had barely known me for a day and was already making an effort to make me feel welcome.

At least one Henderson seemed happy I was there.