Mending Her Broken Heart

Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Coward

The staring contest that I had with Miss Imorgen was interrupted when a lady approached her. Her attention was immediately taken by the lady that rushed into her and looking like she's handling such emergency that she's about to tell Clara.

It looks like she needs to leave.

I understood her situation just by looking at her and the lady that she's currently talking to. I can't figure out why, but I kinda want to just stand there all day and watch her. There's a magnetic field built inside her that makes me want to be close to her. I am captivated by her. Her beauty and her cooking skills. The fact that I've been looking up to her since the very first day that I tasted one of her restaurant's specialties, is what makes this unexpected meeting more interesting to me. I want to approach her. Talk to her and rain her down with so much compliments because she deserves it. This woman can mean the whole world to every guy breathing in this generation. If ever she's in a relationship right now, her boyfriend is so goddamn lucky.

I really want to approach her, but I can't move my feet. I really want to talk to her, but I can't seem to speak even just a single word.

I can't do it. I just can't. I just stood there like my feet are cemented on the floor.

I saw her nod, I saw her eyebrows raise, and I even saw how her lips move everytime she's speaking. She's already breathtaking and so gorgeous this far. I think I can't take it if I'll see her up close. I feel like I would do whatever she says if ever she summon me to do anything. This is too much for me to absorb.

For pete's sake! I just arrived here in Vegas yet this is what I'm going to see? How am I going to pretend that it's nothing for me?

Geez, Schyler. You're being a coward again.

I just discarded every thought in my head as all my attention rained down on Clara. It only took them a minute before deciding to leave. But she left me with my mouth half open when she meaningfully looked at me for the last time before finally leaving.

Shit. What was that?

Those amber eyes. Those eyes left me with my mouth half open with no word said. Damn it. What's happening? What is she doing to me? Is she a witch? Was I bewitched?

What just happened?

Instead of thinking about it more, I just sighed and convinced myself to shrugged it off and forget about it. She doesn't know me. Why would she give me a meaningful look? And why am I so sure that it was a meaningful look? It was all nonsense. I'm sure.

"Okay, let's continue walking" I said to myself. With that, even though my head is still floating because of what happened, I continued walking as I explore the conservatory more. Everything that my eyes witnessed was attractive and obviously made with so much effort. Just like earlier, I took some photos again and sent them all to my mom. I continued walking and walking until I found myself at the casino and watching some folks playing. I was drinking tequila when I felt my phone vibrating and making noise in my pocket.

Meaning, someone is calling.

What the hell.

That made me finish my tequila immediately before taking my phone out. I saw that the caller is an unregistered number but I answered the call without any hesitations.

"Schyler Dael speaking, who's this?"

While waiting for a response from the other line, I signaled the bartender to give me another shot of tequila. He nodded and I mouthed, "Thank you." He just smiled.

"This is Elisa, sir."

My eyebrows raised, "Elisa? How did you get my number?"

I took the glass with tequila in it when the bartender gave it to me. I took a sip while I was waiting for Elisa to talk.

"From your secretary, sir. She was hesitant to give me your number but I told her that I can't find you so she gave it to me in the end." I nodded even though she couldn't see me. "I called to say that Mrs. Tanner is waiting for you, sir. She's standing in front of your suite's door." I almost dropped the glass I was holding after she told me that Kaden is in front of my suite's entrance.

What the f**k? What am I going to do?

Shit. s**t.

I ended the call immediately and finished drinking my tequila. I payed for every shot of tequila I had before rushing back to my suite. I was already inside the elevator when I realized that I don't have anything to say in front of her. Why am I rushing anyway? What face am I going to show in front of her? How am I going to act in front of her? I mean, this is our first interaction after she got married. I felt like she distanced herself away from me so I distanced myself away from her too. That was also the last time we saw each other. After her wedding, nothing happened between us anymore. No talks, no interactions, no texts, and no stares. It ended that way.

Now what? How am I going to do this?

I licked and pressed my lips together as the elevator opened. I'm already holding my key card and I'm planning to let her inside my suite to have a conversation with her in a decent place. I was getting closer to where my suite is and I felt my heart starting to beat abnormally again. I can clearly hear it pounding hard like it can't calm. My heart fears Kaden a lot. I can feel it.

I was still walking when I saw someone in front of my suite's entrance.

That's her?

She's wearing an off shoulder white floral dress paired with white stilettos.

She was walking back and forth in front of my suite. She looks like she's panicking and couldn't calm too. I decided to stop walking and watched her lose her mind instead. I can't also calm. And now, watching her being like this makes me uncomfortable. I can't talk to her like this. This is very impromptu. Why would she think that it's all fine to talk to me after every brutal feeling she made me feel.

Don't tell me that she needs closure. Because I need it more than she does. She doesn't have the rights to demand a closure. She's the one who left. Not me.

I saw Kaden took deep breaths again and again. She's trying to calm herself while I toughened myself up.

Man up, Schyler.

You did nothing wrong.

I tightened my hold on my key card before I finally continued walking to her. I can feel and hear every beat that my heart is making. It's very unusual but I endured it because I believe that I'm ready to finally approach her.

This is what I want, right?

Then, so be it. Face your fear, Schyler.

Let's see if you'll lasts.

Even though I feel all jelly in the inside, I continued walking until I reached my suite. Before I even know it, she already saw me and was taken aback. I didn't gave attention to her reaction after seeing me. Instead, I played it cool and opened the door for her using my key card.

"Kaden," I let out a heavy sigh before showing her fake a smile. She was still a little bit surprised. That's what I've sensed.

"It's nice to see you again. Your secretary already told me that you're going to drop by but I wasn't here. I'm sorry if I made you wait. I was at the casino—"

"Tequila?"

I look at her with my eyes questioning hers, "Huh? What do you mean by tequila? You want to drink tequi—"

"You smell like tequila. You had shots?" I gulped. Is it really recognizable? How come do I smell like tequila? I only had four shots. What kind of nose does she have? "Ah, yes. I had a couple of shots at the casino." I dodged the suspicious look she gave me as I widened the way the door was opened. "Let's talk inside?" I was giving my best and showing her a smile that had always worked on every situation like this. But she just nodded while still giving me suspicious looks. I shrugged it off and went inside first. I felt her followed me because her footsteps are too recognizable.

"Would you like to drink something? I could spend a few bucks. Would you?"

Kaden is still silent after knowing that I had a couple shots of tequila at the casino. f**k. Why is this lady being silent? I thought she wants a chance to talk to me? Then why is she being like this? I can barely talk and smile. And I'm trying my damn best to face her yet this is what she's going to give me? What kind of treatment is this?

"I'm not really thirsty. I just really want to talk." She simply sat down at the couch of the living room. "Just us. Sit with me, Schyler. I have a lot of explaining to do." My lips parted. Explaining to do? What the f**k is this? After 3 years, she's going to give me her explanation now like it's not too late? No. s**t. No. I don't want to be treated like this. I don't want to tackle about the past with her. I don't want her to discover the small amount of hope within me. I don't want her to see a way to harm me again if she'll make that small hope grow at its finest.

I'm not up for this kind of situation. I can't pretend and try my best more further.

Fine. I'm a freaking coward. I admit it myself.

As I walk to the couch she's sitting at, I took my phone and simply texted Harvey to call me immediately. I told him that it's an emergency.

I waited for Harvey to call and sat at the couch in front of Kaden's.

"So, what do you want to talk about?"

I let out a heavy sigh. I hope she recognize that I want her to leave now and forget the explanation she have to say to me. Because I don't want and need it anymore. She can keep it. I'm done being under her spell.

"About what happened 3 years ago—"

I almost rolled my eyes at her but Kaden was cut off by my phone. Harvey exactly called when I wanted. This jerk is indeed my best friend after all. He's just so terrible sometimes.

I gave Kaden an apologetic look before standing up. "I'm sorry but I really need to take this outside." I made myself look apologetic as much as I can. And I think it worked because she nodded with a small smile formed by her lips. "Go on. I'll wait." With that, I immediately went out of my suite and closed the door. I answered Harvey's call and the first thing I heard was his greeting for this kind of situation. His teasing laughter.

I hate you, Aglauros.

"Well, well, well. I told you. So much for being brave, my little coward baby."

I rolled my eyes when he continued laughing because of my misery. "Shut up, Aglauros. You're annoying and a jerk at the same time. But I rather talk to you than to listen to all of her lies." Harvey stopped laughing and sighed like he got tired of it. "What do you mean by that, Schy? Lies? She wants you back and she thinks lying is the solution for you to fall for her again? Is that it?" I started walking forward and away from my suite's door. "I don't know, Harv. I'm not sure of anything. She said she have lots of explaining to do. And when I knew that it's about what happened 3 years ago, I felt like I don't want to hear it." I sighed as I shook my head like Harvey can see me look disappointed.

"Bud, I might sound a little bit off but I don't want her explanation because I might think that there's still a chance for me to have her back. And you know damn well about this small amount of hope inside me." My left hand made it to my forehead as it slides down to my whole face. I just faced her yet it feels like I'm already done and drained because of the heaviness she caused inside me.

"I don't want to f**k it up, Harv. She's already married. But if I will listen to her explanation now and hear that she really did loved me back then, I know that I will try everything to get her back. Whatever it takes. If I want something, I got it."

I was still walking through the hallway. But when I walked pass by a half opened door, I immediately stopped and wondered why it was open. It took my attention and it made me forgot about Harvey.

"I found a guy told me I was a star..."

I automatically ended the call when I heard someone singing from the room with its door half opened.

"He held the door, held my hand in the dark."

I don't know why, but the sweet voice owned by the owner of this room has captured me well that I tried to take a look inside.

"And he's perfect on paper but he's lying to my face."

I didn't had a good look but I decided to step back and keep my eyes out instead.

"Does he think that I'm the kind of girl who needs to be saved?"

My eyes are kept outside, but my right ear was listening closely by leaning it to the wall near the half opened door.

"And there's one more boy who's from my past."

"We fell in love but it didn't lasts,"

I smiled. I feel you, pal. Nothing lasts forever.

"'Cause the second I figured it out, he pushes me away. And, I won't fight for love if you won't meet me halfway."

It's the second time today that I was captivated. There must be some explanation. The owner of this room is probably angelic and a singer.

"And I'll say that I'm through but this song's still for you..."

Her singing was accompanied by a piano when she hit the chorus. And I swear to God, her voice sounds like heaven to me. It was enough to make me forget about my misery.

And it was also enough to make me stay and listen until she finished the whole song.