36. ** ALINA**
Having Fraiser join me for the evening was lovely. It was nice to feel close to someone for a while. Touching him stirred feelings of wanting to take things further physically, but I stopped myself from acting on impulse. I wasn’t sure if getting involved with Fraiser was the right course of action. It raised all sorts of questions that I didn’t know how to answer. I could lose myself and forget all my worries by taking Fraiser to bed, but that was something Alina would have done. And I didn’t want to be Alina anymore. Lizzie didn’t need to use s*x to make herself feel better. It's OK to be uncomfortable. I reassured myself. I just need to feel it, acknowledge it, and move on.
People were always going to start asking questions about my past eventually. By avoiding talki
