(6) YOUTH IS FLEETING, ISLA
1623 Words
Isla
“Who are you?” I asked the girl in front of me.
She arched her brow, crossed her arms and took me in from head to toe before scoffing. “I should be the one asking the questions.”
“I … I’m Jason’s girlfriend.” I whispered, hating how unsure and small my voice was.
“Girlfriend,” she frowned. “My mate doesn’t have a girlfriend.”
Mate?
After the incident last night, I’d tossed and turned unable to sleep as guilt ate me alive. The fact that I had let Ryder touch me the way he had, even gone pliant in his arms was bad enough.
But moaning? Getting wet and almost wanting to touch myself twice —immediately I left his room and this morning while showering, was outright disgraceful.
He was going to be my stepbrother. What will people say? How will my mom look at me if she knew that just last night I’d barely stopped myself from opening my legs wider when her future stepson had fingered me.
And then there was Jason.
The sun was barely up when I’d entered my truck and hightailed it out of the house like my ass was on fire.
But when I had gotten to my boyfriend’s dormitory, my heart ricocheting like he’d look at me and immediately knew what I did last night, the door had been yanked open but instead of meeting the brown eyes of the man I love, I was looking at a skinny, green-haired girl who I most definitely woke up.
I’d have concluded that perhaps Jason had moved from the room and forgotten to inform me if not that not only did she smell like him, but the shirt she currently had on which showcased her long, endless legs was my birthday gift to him.
It was a designer shirt that I’d spent months of my allowance on. Jason had written my name with a heart on it and although we tried to wash it off, there were still traces of the stain if you know where to look.
And I was currently looking at the right hand sleeve when she dropped the mate bomb on me.
“Mate?” I spluttered.
Jason had found his mate and it was this extremely attractive girl who had answered his door without pants?
“He never told me about you.” I said at a loss of words.
“Well he did tell me about you. Pathetic and needy were his exact words,” she deadpanned. “And your messages, I got tired of deleting them. Your rich girl prep school doesn’t come with friends and I don’t know an actual life that doesn’t necessitate you texting my mate by the seconds? And don’t even get me started on your complaints…” her voice suddenly became whiny, “I get perfect grades, Jason. Look, my life is perfect and I have all these clothes to pick from. There is also my personal favorite…woe is me, my mother is getting married to the most wealthy man in town, cue, cry myself to sleep.”
The rancor in her voice left me speechless. I’ve never been on the receiving end of that much revulsion and loathing, worse from someone I just found out existed barely minutes ago.
I should be livid. Hysterical even. Not only had I found out my boyfriend from all indication was cheating but I’d just been chewed out by the woman he was sleeping with, yet I just stood stock still and shocked.
You know the word heartbreak was misleading. For something to break, there had to be a sound on impact. Something for people to take notice of. Perhaps they might care more, perhaps their voice might be a little softer, their words a little kinder.
But heartbreak was soundless. It was me standing in front of my boyfriend’s door, confusion on my face while my eyes watered.
She c****d her head looking me over. “Say something,” she said. “This is when you engage me and fling insults at me. Or apart from looking like a kindergarten teacher who raided her mom’s closet and swore off men, don’t you have any other skill set?”
“Insult you?” I whispered, chuckling. “I don’t know how to. You’re right. I’m not good at much. Perhaps school,” I shrugged. “But Jason? I’m perfect at the subject. I know his likes, his dislikes, how he takes his coffee… the story behind his name.” I choked on my words. “Can you… can you let him go? He is your mate but this is not fair, I’ve spent all my life loving him so how can I just stop?” I asked shaking my head, a sob leaving my lips. “… trust me, I want to walk away with a dignified huff and forget all about him. He is a despicable cheat after all. But what is my pride compared to all the years I’ve spent loving him? So I’d not insult you, I cannot. Instead, I plead with you. Please just don’t take him from me because you can.”
It was her turn to stand completely still at the door, her mouth open. She must have underestimated how pathetic I was.
“Isla,” I heard behind me.
I turned. He was wearing a baseball hat backward on curly brown hair, a big grin on his face which slowly disappeared as he looked at me.
I blinked. How could he look so normal while doing this to me? How could he breathe?
He was holding two paper bags from our cafe— the one where we met.
His mate quickly stepped forward and grabbed the both, her lips twisted in a frown. “Fix this,” she said then slammed the door at both our faces, seconds after Jason nodded.
He took me by the hand and it was almost an outside the body experience as I realized I was the this.
We were in front of the dorm gate when he finally released me. “You should have called.” He said.
No I’m sorry, not even the pathetic it isn’t what it looks like… no lame excuse.
“Jason,” I whispered, my voice broke and I licked my lips trying again. “We are suppose to imprint on each other in a month on my birthday. I’ve waited on this day for the past five years.”
“I met my mate.”
“You told me it was just biology when we both found out we weren’t each other’s mate. That even though you meet her, nothing will change,” I argued. “You loved me. We were happy! I know we were. You told me that choosing each other was more romantic. Goddess, don’t do this to me.” I sobbed.
“I…” he stuttered. “I was thirteen and I didn’t know it’d be like… this.” He breathed out. “I was going to tell you but I didn’t want to hurt you,” his eyes were filled with pity. It hurt more than seeing that woman wearing his shirt. And that had destroyed me.
Why did they never chose me? Why were they all doing this to me?
First it was mom and now Jason.
“So what? We break up…”
“Break up?” He choked out, his eyes widening and even though I knew that he was only scared of what breaking up with the future stepdaughter of the alpha will mean for him and his dream to be mayor, my stupid little heart still managed to leap. To hope. “A break. Let’s do that. Take a break and explore other options. If you take a second to just look at all this objectively, this could even be a good thing.” He said.
“A good thing?” I echoed in disbelief.
“We have both dated each other all our lives, we should explore, find out what we like.” He replied.
“You want me to date other men?” I asked, my voice flat. I paused, my eyes watering. “You told me you wanted us to wait to have s*x till after our mating ceremony. You insisted!”
He looked away. “And my opinion has changed. Waiting? That’d be dumb, youth is fleeting, Isla.”
I choked on a tear at his words and he frowned. “Don’t play the victim, Isla. It is draining.”
“This is draining?” I asked, my voice raised as one of my fisted hands hit his chest. “I’ve loved you my whole life. I’ve waited all my life for you. And what do you do? You ignored me. You betrayed and cheated on me. And now you want a break? Like I’m just supposed to give you a pass while you ride my stepfather’s coattails for as long as you can? That is draining. You are draining me!” I screamed, punctuating all my sentences by hitting his chest.
“I’m sorry, Isla.” He apologized, his hand on his neck. It was his tell. He was lying.
I chuckled bitterly. He was not even sorry. That was the most minuscule consideration and he didn’t even feel it.
“Can we talk about this later? Jasmine will be upset if I don’t return soon,” he said and before I could manage words, he slipped away leaving me standing in front of his gate, feeling gutted, broken and defeated.
My heart shattered, falling again and again. But heartbreak was silent, nobody turned.
- Writer
