Twenty-Four
I WAKE UP IN A DARK room and for a minute, forget where I am. One move to reach for my phone reminds me not only that I’m in the hospital, but also why.
I get my phone and pull up the screen to find out it's 4:00 a.m. in the morning. I remember one time I was up this early was when the Archbishop sent me on a short retreat to Our Lady of the Mount after Leonard’s suicide. The bell had woken me then, calling me to begin my day by praising God. I knew the brothers were silently rising and leaving their cells, softly chanting. I remembered how I had so often joined them joyfully during my time with them before I left for seminary.
That day, however, I rolled over, covered my head with my pillow, and went back to sleep.
Not this time. I may not be a priest next week but I
