Nihilist: Volume I

Fracture: Act I

Snowstar

When many close their eyes

To fade their thoughts into a void of dreams

They find darkness

A pure darkness to stare into

Hoping to find their visions of the future

In little lights that create a thousand images

Playing a movie of their lives

Different from what they had

Before they drifted to sleep

I am a thief to the universe

For the stars that gave that void life

Had once fallen into my arms

And burnt away

Like fireflies in a hollow forest

Every second giving another chance

For their light to shed away

To leave what remains

An increasingly dark

Horridly silent

Haunting void

To consume our minds

And grasp our souls

Sending us deeper

Until we’re unable to wake up again

Black Branches

Every step the child takes

Deep into the void of the earth

Another demon crawls from its numbing walls

To drag the child down to hell

Five steps forward, her fingers numb

Her grasp on her plush slipping

With her breaths

Five more, her calls for her sister

Echo into meaningless noise

For she stands in a crater of the earth

A void that devours the light of life

The event horizon

Fifteen in, the light of the entrance

Swallowed by the black hole around her

Her sight fading to the darkness

A frozen compass

Her legs start to lock

Her eyes drift close

Her existence drifting

Her thoughts blurred

From the pulsing sound

Of a heartbeat

And as she slips from her path

Rolling to the ground in fear

The thumps of her own heart

Melt with the one beyond

And the child closes her eyes

Falling into a deep sleep

Waiting for the noise

To freeze

And yet, it keeps going

Her breaths never halt

She rests in the void

Blind in the sight of mortality

But deep within, she finds

An undying, constant sound

That keeps her awake

Crawling in the depths of her mind

She watches as death avoids her

And she remains in the cavity

Feeling the weight of the world

Shift without her

A continuous, violent purgatory

Where her thoughts roam free

Her body no longer viable

Soon to release her soul

As it escapes from its mortal cage

Crawling to an eternal heart

Reality shifting with its blood

The child soon to see again

Beyond the cave, the earth

And the universe

And so it continues

At the center of the event horizon

Thump, thump, thump, thump

Arrival

Here they are

The thump, thump, thumps

Of the helicopter blades spinning

With a violent speed

Slicing the raindrops and piercing with the thunder

Blinding those who watch it land on the pad

With a heavy light beaming across the platform

The entrance to the skyscraper restaurant

Grabbing the attention of those who pilot inside

She’s close, I can feel it

Her heart pulses with mine

As it did for eons before

I haven’t spoken to her in so many years

But time is an illusion

I can’t let those affect my actions

For I control the outcomes

I uphold the greatest lie

That keeps the universe sane

To give a purpose to existence

Balance

She steps from the air vehicle

Her eyes a bright turquoise

To let me know that she was the one

Bringing the rain to our feet

The black of her hair to match our surroundings

The curls just above her brows

Swirling with the waves of the ocean below

Her face drowning any other thoughts in my head

Her dress sparkling above glass shoes

Ones that she’ll take off to step into the skies

Taking my hand to dance under the moonlight

Spreading an aurora to replace the smoke

Erasing the storm

Calming the seas

And breathing a new air

Into the world

Blue Dress

She steps into the restaurant with more grace

Than the marble pillars outlined with gold

Her infamous smile large and content

Her face beaming full of excitement

Brighter than the diamond chandeliers above

I could almost assure that those gems

Were reflected in her pupils

As she walked over the dark blue carpet

Patterned with an inky black

Closer to me with a bag in hand

Glittered and sparkled

That held a gift I had told her to return

When we spoke again

I could only wish that

My dress was as bright as hers

For even though it was the purest of white

Calling to the storms of snow

It wasn’t anything compared to what she had

What she was

A great pearl to the seas

A great wall of ice

Had formed as a barrier

To block her waves

From drowning my shimmering flakes

We had been absent from each other

Distant and forgotten

For so long

But we never had come to believe

That we are the same

Sisters

For the snow, the ice, and the water

Are all one

In different states

Of time

Golden Table

We sit across from each other

Our greetings turned into conversation

And our personalities blend

With the gold that glossed the marble

Of a table within a room

Where the clouds reach down

To cover the bright lights in the palace

And to spread their shine with a reminder

That when we feel we’re not as high

We can hug the stars

We can touch the dark

And brush our fingertips

Into a silked painting

That we crafted ourselves

I’m so happy to see you again

The stars shine brighter when we’re together

But they wouldn’t be there

If you weren’t here to begin with

The lights have already faded

Not from the clouds

But from your eyes

Gazing into min

Where I find a new universe

Deep within the pupils

A void so dark the light could never shine

And the beauty of nothing

A great blue shadow

Reflecting from the brightest star

The center of existence

Circling within your irises

This is really you, isn’t it?

Not a mask, not a lie.

Do I believe you

Or can I believe myself

For my eyes aren’t like yours

They hold the moon

When the sun isn’t there to find it

My gravity drifting off

My reality missing

Because there is no reality

When you aren’t within it

Home

Many believe

That their home is a place

Where they feel safest

A retreat that allows us to be ourselves

While we form a connection

To the structures that hold our hearts

With the memories that we craft within it

Lying as the foundation of our time

We spent together

The walls bleed with every nail

Holding up a memory of you

Or to rest a mirror

To show my tears

The ceiling watches in pity

The chandeliers without a sparkle

And the floors

Carry a reflection

Of what I fear

As I attempt to bury myself below them

For every time I look down

It is to cower from the world

After what I have found it to be

Without you

I find it so interesting

How home is so comforting

When the carpets are stained

In crimson

And the windows are shut

To hide the darkness

Surrounding my heart

For my home is not within this structure

But within the stars

My heart doesn’t rest within the walls

But with yours

And wherever you are

I will follow you

Because you

Are where I feel safest

You are my home

Her Voice

You talk to me

Like we’ve known each other all our lives

But what does that define

When we’ve lived

Since the beginning of time

When we watched the first dawn together

When we saw life crumble

And rise again

Evolved into something greater

But never enough to find us

For we found beauty in nothing

We only had each other

We weren’t like the rest

For our eyes have seen more

Than any human to breathe

Or rest with the soil

We know the balance

Without touching the apple

Lured by a snake

We found another way

To know reality together

Your voice caresses my name

Like two doves snuggling in a great tree

Above a plateau full of blooming life

Your words become lyrics to lullabies

That seizes the death looming at night

And puts the world to sleep

Safe and sound

Wrapped in a blanket of your tone

Soothed by your thoughts

You take care of me

Your little sister

Because to this day

Even if we’ve lived for eons

Or a single day

You will always manage

To know how to keep me

Breathing

A Reunion Gift

Within a plastic bag

Covered in sparkles

Carried from the glimmer of

Ocean waves against the heat of a summer day

Lies a gift that was already given

In another life

Another generation

Where a war had been lost

And our captors had taken control

For the celestial life

Like a child

Cannot be without supervision

Without someone to watch over them

Towering with the corpses of the past

To take control of our minds

And handle us as puppets

To venture into the dark

Travelers of the cosmos

Finding hope

In the inevitable

Plush, Pt. I

Strokes of ivory hair

Against a silver brush

Flakes of snow crawling

To the winter's daughter

Long before her rise

As a woman

Before her mirror

She rests in her cottage

Isolated in a spruce forest

But warm within her home

Staring deep into her icy eyes

Yet to c***k to the cold weight

Of her harsh, numb future

A thin scar dashes across her cheek

A mystery under pale snow

The memories of her past

Locked deep in the crevices

Of the earth

Her sister enters the room

Eager to bring her sibling

A gift of remembrance

If the ice ever lost its shade

Of blue

A plush bear

Light as a snowflake

Falls into the arms

Of the gift's receiver

The girl with ivory hair

Looking up to her sister

Strands of navy

Running through her fingers

Brushing the silky waves

Of her sibling's hair

Away from her ocean eyes

And as the two sisters

Hold each other close

In the warmth of their home

The plush snuggled deep

In the crevice of space

Between them

The whirr of gunfire

Slices through the air

And the force of an army

Storming through the forest

Invades the warmth of home

With the avalanche

Of a tyrant

The children run

Abandoning their comfort

Their home soon in shambles

The gunfire roars louder

As the sisters rush outside

Leaving their parents behind

As they sacrifice themselves

To give their kin a path safe

From the incoming storm

And the two leave together

Chasing the warmth of the dawn

As they watch a tyrant force

Claim what was once theirs

A gift stolen in the name

Of salvation

And the sisters hold the plush

The only warmth left

In the dreary, frozen world

As the blue of the ice

Begins to feel the heat

Of a bleeding red

Plush, Pt. II

An item made from the softest fabric

A simple comfort for a lonely child

It is held with greater care

Than a man for his pride

And a boundless trust is created

When the child stares into the plastic eyes

As it makes a pinky promise

Never to tell any of the child’s secrets

And to forever keep the child safe

As time brought its wrath

The plush had sat to watch the child grow

But forced to be used as a decoration

Rather than a friend

It was placed in the background

Not to be mentioned without a reason

It watched the child paint the room in fear

It watched the child flood the room in tears

It had watched the child slice the room in screams

It had sat to watch every slamming door

It had sat to watch every thumping footstep

It had wished it could be more

When it watched the child bleed

It had kept its promise

To be there

To be aware of the child

But not to keep him safe

For the child had learned

Of the dark the world had to offer

The plush became

A simple memory for lonely days

But those days grew to be equal

And the child was no longer known

As a child

Yet the plush

Without a name of meaning

Became an item without meaning

With everything else in the room

Except the frozen body of its owner

Resting in eternal sleep

Delay Time

The water moves in the fishtank

With the waves of a surrounding sea

The lights are unable to expose the blue

Hidden in the black

And as life exists

The great wrath of time runs down my glass

Like a droplet of water under ice

Finding the surface it will melt against

To cease its purpose

Another movement, another second

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick

There are no clocks in this room

But the one in my head

Always reminds me

We’re running out

Every warm, soft breath I make

Time chokes from under me

As if I were floating in a cavity

A place without purpose

I cannot cease time as it does to life

But I can decide where it goes

For one decision

Like a branch on a tree

Can spread into others

Blossoming into what makes life so special

Those rare, cherished moments

Brought by hundreds of vigilant decisions

And the wink from a shooting star

Viewing Branches

I fall through a million dimensions

With ten exhales against the cold, slow winds

Flowing around a field to lift thick flakes of snow

Off the infinite earth of my mind

A hollow sun touches clear, white skies

That reflects the pale sickness of my reality

I call to Aries

The name I was given, but not at birth

I hold the power of war

With intentions that rest with the angels

I rest my body

Below a massive tree

Coated with the gleaming care

Of solace and protection

With the branches of life

Hanging over my head

To reach the furthest futures

From the decisions of the past

Overlapping each other and racing to spread

All coming from the stump of childhood

The beginning years

That bring the only form of purity

Innocence

To the dark corners of the world

Now

I need to find out how to change now

I watch the events that take place

Within the tower my sister and I remain

In different realities

Different words

Different choices

Different outcomes

Each one leading to another end

They all end

But I’m looking for the future

That reaches the furthest

For every outcome I see

Follows her footsteps outside the warmth

Of the skyscraper above the abyss

Melting the horizon with the night sky

And leaving once more

I have to find the branch

Where she doesn’t

Where she stays

A gem found but not taken

While it sits for eons

Under stone and earth

Shining against sunbeams

Forever to be appraised

In its glory and unique beauty

And never to be buried

With the weight of time