The Honeymoon Game

The Flashback

“Did you just stupidly spill my drink on me?” she asked back, with a matching tune of anger.

“You should have known that was a mistake!” I yelled back, forgetting all about being a gentleman.

“Should I? Why the heck are you running through a crowd like this without watching your way? Do you have some mental issues or something?” She fired on.

“Really? You are the one that just raised your hands on a complete stranger for an action that was very much a mistake and you do not suspect that you have more mental issues? Wow.” I didn't care right now about creating a scene.

The lady before me was acting very not womanly and I needed to put her in her place without considering her tempting look. After all, this was my dad's wedding and I was the best man.

“What?” Her eyes blazed furry.

“Yes ma'am, you heard me. I believe you have something eating you up and it has probably eaten into your brain and is now affecting you mentally. It's the best explanation as to why you would act so rudely at an occasion like this.” I placed both my hands on my waist, imitating her pose.

“You just ruined my dress!” She screamed, as though she was only just realizing it. “And you speak to me about being rude? Man you're so uncultured and you know what?” She stepped closer, so that I could catch the scent of her perfume.

“What?” I took one step closer too. One would think we were about to do a no hand kiss challenge with our posture. I wouldn't have minded that.

“I do not regret slapping you and I'm only going to leave here quietly because unlike you, I respect the couples and wouldn't want to create a scene,” she brushed past me into the hall that was crowded with dancing guests.

She didn't even wait for my comeback. I was ready to play this childish game with her. After all, it was because of her I couldn't meet up with Keisha. Why was she even so angry at me anyways? If she was watching her way, she would have prevented the accident. Damnn! Women have to be like the most problematic creatures on it.

And I meant it. Because why would Keisha decide to bail on me on a day like this? I had this all planned out and she had to ruin everything. I paced around for a while, thinking of any brilliant idea to save the rest of the day, but nothing was coming.

“Hey man,” I didn't need to turn around to know it was Elvis.

“Here,” he handed me a cup of champagne.

“Thanks bro,” I collected the drink, gulping it down in a swallow. “I might be needing more of this to fix up my mood,” I pushed the cup into his hand, walking towards an empty table arranged outside the hall.

“What's up, you look stressed out. Had a fight with your Dad?” He asked, taking the seat opposite mine.

“I wouldn't be like this if it was my old man.” I looked around, searching for a waiter or anyone serving drinks.

“So what is it then?”

“It's Kiesha bro.” my eyes caught sight of a lady dressed in a pencil black skirt and a white collared top, that was tucked in the skirt neatly. She had an apron tied to the front of the dress and held a tray containing a bottle of wine and a few glasses.

“Oh, I should have known. What about her? Did you do or say something to upset her?” Elvis asked.

“Are you being serious right now? So whenever we have a fight it has to be because I said something? I thought you'd be on my side,” I sighed disappointedly. The waiter girl was passing close by, so I hollered at her to come to our table.

“You know it's not like that. These female flocks would never admit being the reason for a fight. I thought you should have known that by now.”

“I know that. But supporting her even in her absence? That's f****d up man,” i was staring at the waiter as she strolled elegantly towards us.

“But you know I can't really blame Keisha,” I heard him saying, but was too distracted with the view before me.

“Hi, do you need something? I saw you beckoning on me,” she flashed a natural smile my way.

“Yes, yes I need a lot from you. But we could start with the drink on the tray.” I winked at her.

She laid the tray on the table.“What else would you be needing me to do sir?”

“Call me Darnell . I'm the best man of the groom who is also my Dad. And you see, I'm thinking of following in his steps with someone as pretty as you soon,” I wooed her.

“I'm sorry, I'm gay,” she apologized.

“Damn! I could be gay too you know,” I wasn't ready to relent.

“Oh, then you could be tying the knot with the cute man beside you. Excuse me sir,” she bowed slightly.

I was stunned beyond words. How would someone so naturally endowed decide to be gay? Elvis was laughing beside me. “What's funny?” I turned to him.

“Darnell seriously? You willing to turn gay for a lady?” He asked, still laughing.

“You're promising some random girl marriage yet you wouldn't bring up the topic for once with Keisha?” He went on.

“You just have a big mouth, Elvis.” I poured some of the wine that was served into a glass and sipped from it.

“I'm being real bro. You need to change. Where is Keisha by the way?”

“You wouldn't just shut up, would you?” I drained the rest of the wine in my glass and rose to my feet, heading back to the hall.

“Where are you going?” Elvis called out.

“To get drunk,” I answered without looking back.

Chapter Three

Fiona’s Pov

I should have known better than attending this wedding. I just knew it was a bad idea. Now look at my dress, all ruined by a lunatic that doesn't even feel apologetic about his actions. I wonder what kind of guest would act so disorderly in a big event like this.

I stared at my reflection on the toilet mirror, feeling sorry for myself. I tried scrubbing the spot, but it only made matters worse. Now I was both wet and stained. Gosh!

It feels even worse knowing that my mum is mad at me on her own wedding day. You know how she's always expecting me to be a perfect daughter right? And then I couldn't make it on time for the church service. She actually wanted me to be there and watch her take the vows with her new man.

She'd called me two weeks before the wedding to invite me over for the wedding shopping.

Flashback

(Two weeks ago)

Fiona’s POV

I didn't need to glance at my phone to know who was calling. It was my mum calling for the third time. I had ignored the first two rings because I was at a meeting and seeing that she kept calling, I had to excuse myself.

'This had better be important' I sighed, before tapping on the receiver button. My mum is usually excited over very little things and half of the time she expects me to share in her excitement, which I find quite immature for someone her age.

Like how jiggy she had sounded last week when she called to tell me about this man she was seeing. She said he had strands of silver hair just like herself and he was a writer. They had first met at the library and then at the mall.

“I just knew we were meant to be after our second meeting,” she giggled over the phone.

Now isn't that just so immature for a woman, who has a full grown ass lady like myself as her daughter? I mean what is really exciting about remarrying in your late fifties? To some dude that's probably wrinkled on the face and can't walk without the aid of a stick?

“Hi ma,” I greeted first.

“A very beautiful morning to you my darling, today seems promising and the weather is just so lovely isn't it?” Her excited tune sounded from the phone speaker.

“Ma i was at a meeting when you called, I had to excuse myself, what is this about?”

I was looking down at the busy street, from the fourth floor of the social right activist building. The weather was indeed lovely, the sky was blue, with silver linings. The sun was not fully out, yet the atmosphere was warm.

“Well I'm fine and thanks for asking.” She retorted, making me feel guilty.

“I didn't ask because you sounded like you were fine Ma, can we just talk about why you've been calling,” I tried to sound unaffected by her guilt-trapping game.

I grew past the age where she gaslighted me into doing what she wanted or feeling guilty for standing on my decision.

“Fiona, you can't always be like this…”

“Mum! Please!” I stopped her.

“Fine. I need you to join Dainna and I for my wedding shopping tomorrow,” she finally dropped.

“I can't Ma. I have work to do.”

“Fiona, you always have work to do, can't you just take out tomorrow for your mother?”

I could tell from her tune that she was pouting. What adult does that? “Mum, you have Dianna, she is your daughter as well. It doesn't have to be,”

“You are my biological daughter Fiona. How did we grow so apart?” She paused, when I said nothing to her question, she continued. “We would take just two hours Fiona and you would be back to work, do this for your mum darling.”

Not like I was as busy as I claimed to be at work, it's just... It's annoying staying around those two. Dianna is a rankling talkative and my mum just loves her so much that sometimes I wonder which of us is her real daughter.

“Ma, if at all I change my mind and join you for this shopping, you and Dianna would have to keep it low with your cackling laughter,”

“I can hear you Coz!” I heard Dianna scream from the background. She was giggling and my mum had joined her.

“Ma how many times do I have to tell you not to put my call on speaker? This is not fair,”

“I'm sorry darling. So we're going to keep it low, we promise. Dianna right?” She was seeking confirmation from my annoying cousin.

“Dianna has agreed. She said yes.” My mum reported back.

“I don't care what she says. And I'm not staying two hours for some boring shopping. One hour and I'm out,” I added.

“One hour thirty minutes. I love you darling. Do take care of yourself and see you tomorrow.”

“Can't wait to see you Coz!” Dianna screamed again. Mum had hung up before I could reply.