Mind Judge

The Right Path

Mmmmm, irony of my fate, this is the tenth... f*****g TIME THAT I DIE THIS WEEK!!

Ok, I understand this is some sort of a f*****g time loop, but seriously, why do I have to go through that "gayass comic books everyday death" BULLSHIT?!

And why do I have to receive a f*****g knee-kick to the balls EVERY SINGLE f*****g DAY!

I mean, look, on the fifth try, I avoided Liya completely, good? Ok good, I ended up bumping into a mad, divorced, housewife who witnessed her new boyfriend cheating on her with a pornstar!

I mean, COME ON! Who wouldn't cheat on his girlfriend with a pornstar nowadays? I understand she was pissed but why take her f*****g RAGE on MY POOR BALLS? I did nothing to receive a knee-kick to the balls? My balls are VIRGIN FOR f**k SAKE I need them with durability 100/100 if I wanna lose my virginity one day!

That's not all, every time I try to talk to Daisy at class I end up choking and dying, it's so exhausting. GOD, at least let me have my first date with her before you end up KILLING ME!

And what makes it worse I have to wake up, every day, forced to hear my dad's thoughts of pleasure and internal MOANS.

"Mmmmm, almost, YES, now I'm relieved ah!" Dad's thoughts.

JESUS!

WHAT THE f**k? SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE f**k, GOD?!! DO YOU HATE ME THAT MUCH? COME ON!

An entire train of thoughts of bitching and curses in Kyle's mind!

I was sitting on the kitchen table and bitching about my terrible life in my mind.

"Kyle?"

"f**k! What?!"

"What?!" she was shocked.

"Oh, nothing, I was just thinking abou- never mind, what's up?"

"Your sandwich!" she offered me the cheese sandwich. Mmmmm, best breakfast in the universe, a cheese sandwich tainted with my dad's MICRO-CHILDREN!

"Thanks, sis'" next time make it yourself Sam, pleaaaaaase!

"Hey, kids," Dad greeted us as he sat on the kitchen table.

"Oh, Kyle, sorry for taking so long in the shower, you may use it now!"

"No, thanks, I won't use it after your operation "Masturbate for ascension,"

The look on my dad's and sister's faces though.

"f**k IT! I'm TIRED OF THIS! And YOU!" I pointed at Samantha in rage.

"NEXT TIME, MAKE THE f*****g SANDWICH YOURSE-"

Slap!

She slapped me, Sam was trembling with fear, her hand was trembling so much with tears dripping down her cheeks.

"f**k THIS!" I cursed and walked out of my house.

I saw Liya talking to a friend of hers and I approached her.

"Hey, Liya! Do you feel like kicking me in the balls today? Please, go ahead, I haven't taken my share of "ball smash" this morning! Go on, DO IT!"

Slap!

Wow, she slapped me. At least she didn't kick me in the balls.

Kick!

But her friend did! Ouw!

Now I can resume my day. I sat down by a concrete wall to take my breath, f**k school, so what if I arrive late, who f*****g cares I'm gonna die anyway!

After like twenty minutes I pulled myself up and decided to head to school. I looked at my phone to check time.

"8:10 AM"

I'm supposed to die at 8:15 AM.

I shook my head and kept walking, I crossed the road when I suddenly had the same headache again and starting to choke. Seriously? Argh! It must be 8:15 AM now.

For some reason I was able to breathe in a few seconds, wait, I'm not dying? HALLELUJAH! I'm not gonna di-..

"WATCH OUT!" someone yelled.

I looked forward and saw a speeding truck approaching me.

"Oh!"

*Snorts* the irony, this time I'll have my ass driven over by a truck, ahahahaha!

AHAHAHAHAHAHA! Lol XD!

*Crush!* -> *Blacks out!*

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*Beep* *Beep* *Beep*

Fuck me sideways.

I pushed myself up and went to my mirror, staring at it.

Man, this time I deserved it. The way I treated my family yesterday was uncalled for, they did nothing to deserve it, even if they did, saying such things to my family and my little sister should never be an approach to any conversation.

I walked downstairs and saw my sister preparing the sandwich, wait, she said it was Dad who made it.

"Sam?!"

She gasped and looked at me, shocked.

"Hi!" She was nervous, she hid the plate behind her.

"Did Dad, make this?"

"Yes yes, Dad made it for you!"

"Ah, I see!"

I sat down on the table and took a few bites of the sandwich.

"Uh, it tastes so,"

"Bad?" She had a disappointed look on her face.

"GOOD! Oh my God! I should thank dad for it!"

She blushed and looked away. I stood up from my chair and wrapped my arms around her, hugging her tightly.

"Eh?" she was surprised due to my sudden hug.

"Thanks for the sandwich, lil' sis. I'm sorry if I've ever made you sad and I want you to know that I'll always love you and will always take care of you, no matter what happens."

That's when I felt her arms being wrapped around me, hugging me back, tightly.

"Love you too, big brotha'!"

Owwwh, she's so sweet, I will never ever ever yell at her, ever again!

We let go of each other.

"Could you make me another sandwich?"

She smiled brightly and went to the kitchen table to make me another one. I know she lied about it at first as she was scared of any harmful comments, how cute!

Both my mum and dad came in to have their coffee before preparing to head out to work.

"Mum, Dad, Sam! There's something important I need to tell you."

"Sorry, sweetie we're kinda in a hurry toda-" My mum tried to make an excuse.

"Please, mum, it's urgent!"

Mum and Dad looked at each other and took a seat on the table.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?" Mum asked.

".... I can read minds!"

The three of them raised their eyebrows, surprised and it was notable they didn't believe me.

"Is my son on drugs? Another one of his jokes. Wow, mind reading? That would be awesome!"

I said their thoughts out loud starting with mum, dad then Sam in order.

They were shocked, especially Sam.

"So, you can read minds? Ok, read mine!" Sam demanded innocently with excitement.

"Alright!" I looked back at her.

"Today I'll ask Jonathan out and we'll go on our first da-" Sam's thoughts.

"Over my dead body, Sam, you're not gonna go out on a date with Jonathan!" I stared back at her.

She dropped her jaw, she was shocked.

"Ok, sweetie, if what you're saying is true then you can read my thoughts too!" Mum exclaimed.

"I wonder if my husband is cheating on me!" Mum's thoughts.

"Let me confirm that thought, mum!" I smiled then looked back at my father.

"Dad, are you cheating on mum?"

"WHAT?!!" Dad was so shocked by the question.

I read his thoughts though then looked back at mum.

"Well, his boss flirts with him on daily basis but he always rejects her attempts so don't worry, dad is completely loyal to you!"

Ok, now I've proved to them that I can read minds. I mean, it's obvious, the look on their faces was like "0.0".

"That doesn't matter now, there's one more thing, at 8:15 AM I'm gonna die!"

"Huh?" mum.

"What?" Dad.

"EH?!!" Sam.

"Just wanted to get everything off my chest before it happens!"

"Oh, sweetie, you're not gonna die!" Mum tried to comfort me.

"Love you, mum, and I'm sorry for not telling you about my mind reading gift."

"It's ok, sweetie, we love you too!"

*Teet*

Ok, it's 8:15 AM now, time to dieeee!

I closed my eyes, now it's all black.

*Beep* *Beep* *Beep*

There we go!

"Oh, sorry, that was my stop-watch!" Dad spoke.

"Wait, what?!" I opened my eyes again.

"Sweetie, you're not gonna die, stop thinking that way, you made us worried!" Mum comforted me again.

"I'm not dead? I'm NOT DEAD!" I jumped in my spot.

YES YEEEEEEEEES! Oh my GOD! HALLELUJAH!!!!

I hugged Sam tightly and lifted her off her chair.

"Ek!" She squeaked due to the sudden hug.

"Oh my God, Sam, I thought I was gonna die and leave you all alone by yourself in this twisted world!"

"Daaw'" she wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly.

"Well then, I guess it's time we head to work!" Said dad as he pushed himself up, put on his jacket and went outside to the car.

Now it's just me and Sam. She picked her school bag and smiled at me.

"I'll head to school too, don't be late for yours!"

"Actually, I'll take today off, I don't feel like going to school today!" Yeah right, I just don't feel like getting kicked in the balls today.

"Oh?"

"Let me walk you to school!"

"Really? Wow, you've never done that for me, it's so sweet!"

"One of the duties of a big brother, right?"

"Sure, I guess!"

"Great, let's go! How far is your school?"

"Uh, like two Kilometers away from here?"

"Oh!" f**k me.

"You don't have to walk me to school, you could just rest here!"

"No way, I've already said I will, I won't go back on my word!" Haha, f**k my life!

I grabbed my wallet and opened the door for Sam. She smiled and stepped out.

We went on our way to her school and magically I could see the mad, divorced housewife approaching our path. Wait, the mad house WIFE?! s**t!

I grabbed Samantha's arm and pulled her with me, hiding behind a pole.

"Ek!" Sam was surprised, "Kyle, what're you doing?"

"Sis' I know this might sound weird but that crazy woman can crush balls with her knee!"

"Balls?"

"Don't ask!"

"Ok!"

We waited.

"Wait, do you think she has passed already?" I asked Sam.

"I don't know, I wasn't paying attention!"

"......"

"Kyle, this is ridiculous, I'll be late for school!"

She moved away from the pole.

"No, wait, Sam-" I tried to follow her and ended up bumping into the woman. Looks like she was delayed by a chat she was having with a friend of hers, well s**t.

She looked at me and looked mad. Oh come on, you kicked my balls nine times already!

Knee kick!

Agkkk, ten. . . . Times!

I held my balls then looks at her, I grinned, grabbed Sam's hand and ran off. I had my phone in my pants right above my boxer for protection. HAH, Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch!

"Are you ok?" Sam was worried.

"Yup" I pulled my phone out of my jeans, yeah yeah you might find that disgusting but whatever, it was a last resort!

"EWWWW, you kept that inside your jeans?!" Sam had a disgusted look on her face.

"Mmmhmmm, sorry sis', I know you're finding that disgusting but at least I'm unharme- AAAAAAAAAAH!" I screamed.

"What?!" Sam panicked

"My phone's screen, it's cracked!"

"Oh God!"

Fuck. My. Life!

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*End of Chapter 7*