More To It

Chapter 14- Am Sorry

Zaynab

“Zaynab, you really think going back to work is going to help you? You’re pregnant and also have to take care of Yousif. I don’t think it’s a good idea”,Eniola tells me as she rubs my back in a soothing manner.

“I’ll make it work somehow-“.

Idris walks into the living room but Abiodun appears behind him.

“What are you doing here?“,I glare at him.

“Well am out of that place. I think am good”,he shrugs and picks up Yousif who snuggles into his neck.

“Really daddy?“,Yousif gasps loudly.

“Yeah”,Abiodun nods.

“Yousif, go play with Azeez”,I tell him.

“Okay”.

He gets down then runs into the playroom with Azeez behind him.

“Why? Why are you leaving?“.

“Because I think am good. I didn’t kill your husband when him and the rest of em bastards were on my neck. I wanted to- ugh God knows I wanted to. But I didn’t. So am good”.

“Asshole”,Fawaz mumbles to himself them rolls his eyes when Abiodun winks at him.

“So after you ruined everything, your decision was to leave? To leave the one place that made you less harmfu-“.

“Okay. I’ve told you to stop bringing up past. I f****d up, I know I did. That’s why I went into that prison WILLINGLY. I chose to. Don’t come here attacking me because you messed up your marriage”,he snaps.

“I MESSED UP MY MARRIAGE? I DID? SO I SUDDENLY HAVE POWERS TO MAKE MYSELF GET PREGNANT?“,I scream at him with anger creeping up.

“Don’t. Don’t do that”,he shakes his head.

“Do what?“.

“Don’t act like you’re mad at me for what I did. You’re not. You’re angry at me for telling him the truth. And you have no right to be angry at me. I told you from jump (the start). I told yo ass to tell him the moment you find out because no same nigga would prefer to have the happiness temporarily. I told you it’d backfire on you. You chose to lie to his face. NOT ME”,he snaps.

I don’t reply, I just glare at him with my chest heaving up and down with anger. I just want to strangle him oh my God. I hate him so much.

“If you’re angry at me for what I did. I understand that bit. But you’re not. And you know that. So stop being angry at me. And the Nigga is f****d up too. He ain’t mad for the right reasons either. He’s basically acting like me when I find out I have a daughter. Because guess what you can’t actually change it. Now can you? I forced myself on you, not the other way around. And he not mad about you lying. Maybe he is a little but he’s angry st the fact that you’re carrying my child and not his”.

“Kids actually”,Fawaz says.

“Fawaz shut up”,Aaleyah smacks his arm.

“What’m he’s the father so he might as well know what the gender of both his kids are”,Fawaz shrugs.

“You found out the gender? What is it?“,Abiodun asks me.

“Two girls”,I lie and watch his expression carefully.

He doesn’t look angry, or happy. He has on a neutral look at first then he hums.

“What? Are you going to kill them too?“,I ask him.

He looks at me and his jaw tightens.

“You really are starting to irritate the f**k out of me with this s**t you’re pulling. Stop bringing up s**t. Am warning you Zaynab. Am f*****g warning you”,he snaps at me.

“What? Why are you surprised. Isn’t that what you do? Am surprised Salma is even still alive. You’ve come here twice and never even looked her way. She’s your daughter, you stupid idiotic goat. How can you be in the same room as your own flesh and blood and not feel anything t-”

He pulls me and slams me into the wall harshly causing me to gasp loudly.

“Abiodun”,everyone gasps then they all stand up instantly.

Abiodun glares at me with heavy breathing then he shuts his eyes tightly before dropping his hands from my shoulders.

“I-i do feel something”he whispers and looks away from me.

“Guilt. Shame. You name it. How can I look at a daughter I’ve thrown around like some rag doll, like she wasn’t my own flesh and blood. The daughter I’ve tried to get rid of countless times. How can I now look at her? Huh?“.

He faces me this time but this time his face held pain, shame, everything he was speaking of.

“Am trying. Am trying to change. It was never about Yousif. It was always you. You Zaynab. I chose to change for you. In hope that maybe, just maybe, you’ll forgive me for everything I’ve done, that you’d give me another chance. But I now see that, no matter what I do to change. My past will always be slammed to my face. Each time. So what’s the point. Right?“.

He looks away and runs his fingers through his hair.

“And yeah, call me selfish again, but I intentionally told your husband so he’d leave. I wanted you to myself and f**k. There’s no point. There’s no us, not anymore. I messed that up. You can’t even trust me, let alone stay in a room alone with me every again. So what’s the point in changing if every f**k up I’ve made will always be smacked in my face?“.

“Abiodun”.

“If I had girls would your thinking be the same?“,I ask him.

“Did you see anger on my face when you told me?“,he asks.

I shake my head then he nods.

“You have your answer”,he whispers then he turns around slowly as Salma walks into the room with Aamanee behind her.

Salma looks at Abiodun and quickly jumps back, she nearly even fell sef if not for Aamanee who held her.

Abiodun folds his arms and raises his eyebrow.

“Come here”,he tells Salma who gulps.

“Why?“,Aamanee asks him.

“Was I talking to you? What is with this family not knowing how to mind their own business damn. Can I have like a minute to speak MY DAUGHTER please?“,he snaps at Aamanee.

“The one you abandoned?“,Aamanee raises an eyebrow.

“I hope you’re not like sick?“,Abiodun snaps.

“I dare you to take another step. Just because I haven’t said anything doesn’t mean nothing. Try to touch her and see what happens. Who do you even think you’re trying to scare?“,Aamanee snaps at him with the same amount of force.

Well damn girl.

“Right about now. You’d be dead. But since we on a new path. Can I speak to her for like a minute”,Abiodun asks her.

“NO”.

“Let him”,Aayan nods to Aamanee.

“Him?“.

Salma let’s go of Aamanee’s hand then she walks towards Abiodun slowly.

Once she was in front of Abiodun she looks down and bites her lip.

“Yeah?“,she whispers.

Abiodun gets down in a squat and looks at Salma. He stares at her for a while and says nothing.

“Am sorry”,he let’s out.

“What?“,my jaws drop with utter shock. Aye. Wonder shall never end.

“What?“,Salma looks at him.

“Am sorry for your mother, for not treating you like my daughter, for not loving you like one, for everything I’ve done, f-“.

Before he could finish Salma throws herself against him and hugs him tightly making him fall on his butt.

“That’s all it took? A sorry?“,Abiodun raises an eyebrow at Salma with confusion.

“With how you were before a sorry is all I need”,she says with a slight giggle escaping her lips.

He stares at her then cracks a smile.

“Well if I get this kinda reaction off you every time. Then I guess I should be saying sorry more”,he comments which made her laugh. I smile at how free she suddenly looked around him. Sorry? That’s all? But then again, she loved him regardless, he’s still her father. No one can replace him, I guess. Just like nobody can replace my own mother, not even mommy Adelola.

“Since am out, let me take you out. Tell me what you like, let me get to know you, and since you’re not comfortable with me, you can bring whoever you want to keep an eye on you”,he tells Salma.

“It’s okay. I know you don’t do anything”,she whispers.

“Is that right?“.

She giggles and nods then hugs him again. He smiles a little and ruffles her hair.

“Am 12”she tells him.

“oh I know”.

“You do?“.

“I may have been an asshole, but I know a few things about you”.

“Oh”,she smiles.

“So imma take her out tomorrow”,he tells Aayan and Aamanee.

“I don’t know. I don’t really think its a good ide-“.

“She’s his daughter Aamanee. And if he’s trying to change. We can’t keep.her away from him. We can help him change”,Aayan tells her.

Abiodun looks at Aayan confused then he looks down at Salma and smiles a little.

“Daddy, what about me? I want to go out too”,Yousif frowns.

“The three of us can go”,Abiodun tells him.

“But its me and you”,he frowns.

“Well now your sister is gonna join us. So shush”.

Yousif looks at Salma then groans loudly.

“Fine”.

“Anyways, just came to see you. I’ll see y’all tomorrow”,Abiodun tells his kids who nod.

He turns to walk out but I stop him by holding his hand.

He turns around and kooks at my hand on his then looks back at me.

“Am sorry. I know you’re trying, so I’ll stop bringing up your past. And also. Am not have girls. Am having twins, boys”,I tell him.

“You’re serious?“,he gasps.

I smile and nod at how excited he looked.

“Not that it matters anymore. But that’s amazing”he says.

I just chuckle knowing damn well he said that to impress me.

I’ll update you on all the check ups. If you want. You can follow me for them? Its on Thursdays every second week at around 9:45".

“I’ll be there”,he smiles.

“Thanks”,he adds.

I smile and nod. He walks out of the room with a smile on his face and for some reason I felt a relief.

“Sooooo, you’re my big sister?“,Yousif turns to Salma who nods.

“You want to play with me then?“.

“Nah, I have to go pray”,she tells him.

“Pray?“,he leans back and gasps.

“Yeah, I missed Maghrib prayer”.

Wallahi his reaction is so funny. He was looking around everywhere with his mouth wide open.

“I didn’t pray”,he tells her.

“You’re supposed to”she walks past him.

“Khalid isn’t here. I usually pray with him but he’s not coming. He’s not even teaching me how to read anymore or reading me stories at night”,Yousif frowns.

“You can read yourself too. You know the alphabets right?“.

“I guesssss”.

“Then you can join them together. Come on I’ll sure you”.

His face brightens up then he follows her up the stairs.

“Me too”,Azeez runs after them.

“Boy don’t be running on them stairs”,Fawaz yells.

Azeez instantly obeys and starts walking slowly. As in REAL SLOW.

“Boy if you don’t”,Fawaz acts as if he was going to start chasing Azeez who picks up his pace and starts laughing.

“Don’t be playing with me boy”,Fawaz chuckles and sits back down.

“Soooo is anyone going to actually talk some sense to Khalid?“,Aayan looks at the elders.

“You know your own twin. He’s done. There’s nothing to say and I can’t force him. It’s his decision and he’s made it”,aunt Ameerah says.

“But I want you to know Zaynab. You’re not at fault. You should’ve told him but if I was in your position, I wouldn’t say it too. He was excited. You didn’t want to hurt him. It wasn’t the right move but it’s done. Maybe we shouldn’t have rushed your marriage. It’s our fault. And am sorry we made you BOTH go through all this”,she adds.

“It’s okay, you just wanted what’s best for us”,I whisper and curl up in a ball.

“I just wish I didn’t actually gain feelings for him. It’s going to be hard to let go now. Seeing him won’t be as a friend anymore”,I whisper.

“Yeah, sucks huh”,Aayan mumbles.

“Kinda glad, am not the one in his position tho. s**t sucks”,he mumbles.

“Yeah?“,I chuckle and shake my head.

“Something tells me, we’re going to finally meet this Amari girl”,I whisper.

“You already know. Hey. Can I be honest?“,Fawaz asks.

“Shoot”,I hum.

“I think y’all was good as a couple. But I loved y’all more as friends. It was free. Ain’t no feelings hurt. Y’all could hurt each others feelings and get back to each other in seconds. But when marriage got in, now every step you make, you had to act as his wife and I felt like you just wasn’t probably uses to that title with HIM yet. So you slipped. He got tired, he’s been in love with you for more than 18 years. He tried. I say let him move on. I think y’all jus wasn’t compatible. It can’t be a coincidence that after years of y’all being together you didn’t conceive for him but just one time with Abiodun, you’re pregnant for him. That s**t ain’t coincidence. Maybe its a sign for y’all to part ways. And if its not, then it should be”.

“And Abiodun?“,I ask him.

“The nigga trying. Its hard for him. Like *chuckles* he really trying not to kill us like. I love watching him struggle like”,Fawaz chuckles.

“You’re an ass”,everyone shakes their heads at his stupid ass.

“But he trying....for you. Maybe he deserves a second chance? I ain’t believe that nigga until he apologized to Salma in front of everyone. Aunt was right, it has to be his past that turned him into some psychotic deranged idiotic murderer. But he’s trying. And plus you’re pregnant with twins for the dude and already gave birth to one for him. Just stay with the dude. But like take it slow, ya’know. I don’t exactly COMPLETELY trust him but y’all already started a family....there’s no point NOT being one”.

“Here. I’ll talk to Khalid, see where things are with y’all. I know he definitely done. But maybe, just maybe, y’all can still be friends”,Aayan says.

“Yeah”.

“Fawaz, what about those new projects?“,his dad asks.

“Oh, about that. I rejected their proposal. Trust me, it wasn’t benefitting us in any way”,Fawaz shakes his head.

“Yes it w-“.

“Daaaad. The business has stepped up its game now. Trust ME. I GOT THIS. Plus you fully retired now so let me handle this and if I ever need help. Imma shout out. But until then, I got this”.

Uncle just watches him suspiciously.

“He has this, leave him be”, his wife chuckles.

“Thanks ma”,Fawaz smiles.

“Plus dad, ain’t you check the company’s status? We’re literally number 2. FROM number 11. Dad come on. Just say you’re proud of me”,Fawaz smirks.

“Is number 2 a good number?“was all uncle said which made us all laugh. Wow.

“Dad, I brought us up”.

“Yeah, good job”.

“Wait actually. Let me not take ALL the credit. I had help. Aaleyah actually was he one who made some of the toughest decisions for me for some projects which got us from 11 to number 5 on the status”,Fawaz says.

“Really?“,everyone looks at Aaleyah.

“Nice one. I didn’t take you for a business type”,uncle says.

“Yeah, am not. But I know about it”,she shrugs.

“Mmm well good work. I knew there was no way you did it alone”,uncle tells Fawaz who gasps loudly.

“DAD”he yells.

“Son”,uncle replies.

“My heart” the rest of us laugh at uncle’s reply while Fawaz just scoffs and rolls his eyes.

“You a hater dad. That’s all you is”,Fawaz mumbles.

Uncle chuckles and shakes his head.

Aayan whispers something to Fawaz which got him all hyped up.

“My guy”,he slaps Aayan’s back who kicks him.

“s**t that hurt”.

“You a lil wimp”,Fawaz kicks him over and over again.

“DUDE!“,Aayan smacks him then he stands up and kicks Fawaz but he accidentally hits his ‘manhood’ instead.

“Ooooh”the girls and i whisper as Fawaz falls on the floor and holds his thing in pain.

“Well there goes your pleasure Aaleyah”,I whisper.

Her eyes widens then she smacks my head before the two of us burst out in laughter.

“Eeeh. Sorry. But you deserved that”,Aayan chuckles.

“Hospital”,Fawaz let’s out and hides his face in Aaleyah’s lap.

“You’ll be fine”,she ruffles his hair.

“That’s like us saying periods don’t hurt”,Fawaz looks up at her with a glare.

“Okay then. Let me get you an ice pack”,she tells him.

“No. Stay. Massage my head again, it felt good”,he tells her and keeps his head on her lap.

“You’re actually such a kid Fawaz”,I shake my head but he just smiles innocently as Aaleyah continues running her fingers through his hair. I smile at the two, they look so in love. And they’ve been married longer than any of us. Aamanee and Aayan. I’ve been married twice and divorced both times. What kind of life do I have like?

“Hey, you okay?“,Aayan asks me.

I smile sadly and nod. He smiles a little then he sits beside me and brings me into his chest.

“Everything will be okay, just stay strong, like you always do”,he whispers into my ear which made me smile.

“Thanks”,I whisper then he kisses my head.

“DUDE, I kicked his ass. Am not playing. Jasmine left asap. Like”,Idris yells as him and Aremu walk into the house.

“Yeah, everyone in school is talking about it. Jasmine told me”,Aremu chuckles.

“Yeah? She likes you”,Aremu adds.

“Yeah. I know. But she don f****d the entire football team, f**k I look like getting with a used up doll”,Idris scoffs.

“IDRIS”,mom gasps loudly.

Ooops?

The boys turn around, I guess not realizing we was in the room. Their reaction? PRICELESS.

“oh hey ma, we were talking about some movie”,Idris whispers.

“Used up doll? That’s now what you refer girls?“.

“Ma. She went off with the entire football team. We ain’t even in our last year of secondary school (highschool) yet. And now she wanna try me? Uh no thanks”,Idris scoffs.

“But still, that’s disrespectful”,I tell him.

“Yeah yeh, I won’t say it again”.

“Good”,mommy whispers.

“Anything to eat?“,He asks.

“You can set rice”.

“I ate that yesterday. Oh my God”,Idris groans.

“Dad can I order out?“,he asks.

Dad hums so Idris takes daddy’s phone.

“Hey you”,Aremu throws Amir up and down making him laugh and hold onto Aremu who chuckles.

Idris’s phone starts vibrating non stop so he picks it up.

“Yo wassup?“.

“Uh why ain’t you just call his phone?”

“*scoffs* okay uh whatever Valerie. Whatever”.

He rolls his eyes then turns to Aremu.

“For you”,he holds his phone out to Aremu who takes it.

“Yeah?“.

“*snickers* nah nah. But sure, um, we can meet up after Chemistry class tomorrow? At the bleachers?”

“Don’t mind him, he just being salty cuz Jasmine hit on him. Mmm”

“Just message me, *chuckles* yeah I seen it. Yeah? Uh you do huh? Okay, okay, I ain’t say nothing. But sure, sure. We can do that. Ight cool. See you tomorrow then”.

“Uh uh. Who’s val?“,Aaleyah asks him.

“Just my classmate”.

“mmmm”,Idris hums slyly which made Aremu step on his foot. Idris screams and pushes him off.

“Val likes him and he likes her too. They have a complicated relationship. She’s waiting on him to ask her out but he won’t because its HARAM and ugh yeah”,Idris rolls his eyes.

“Isn’t that what you should be thinking of too?“,mommy tells him.

“Ma. Then I’d be depriving girls of such a good boyfriend-“.

He runs away as mommy stands up ready to beat him.

“He really said that”,the rest of us start laughing at his statement.

“Am messing ma. Really. Am single and planning on that. Ain’t nun of them girls worth my time anyways. Am focusing on ball”,Idris smiles.

“Mmm what about your study?“,mommy asks him.

“Ma. I told.you countless times. I wanna play ball. As in be a basketball player. I don’t wanna study”,he tells her.

“God Forbid. Why won’t you?“.

“Mom. Am playing ball. Am not discussing this”,he tells her.

“Ah ah”,mommy folds her arms and raises her eyebrows.

“What? So you want me to be something I won’t enjoy? Or take a profession that YOU WANT. I have to be the one that wakes up every morning to go work. Not you ma. You can’t seriously expect me to choose what you want. I love and enjoy ball. And am good at it. So it’s what am focusing on”.

“What do you want to do Aremu?“,mommy dismisses Idris just like that but he ain’t carem the dude even rolled his eyes and walks into the kitchen mumbling to himself. I swear this boy has some guts. It’s not his fault though. Daddy spoils him a lot.

“Probably taking on business or Researching”.

“Researching? For what?“,mommy asks.

“oh kinda like Biotechnology? So Medical research”.

“So like them cancer research?“.

“Yeah...basically”,Aremu nods.

“Omo gidi ni eyi (this one is a good child)“,mommy says loud enough for Idris to hear.

The boy walked out with headphones in. The look on mommy’s face was so funny I wanted to laugh but I knew I shouldn’t. She looked serious.

“Stop comparing him to Aremu. People are different”,daddy tells her.

“THANK YOU!“,Idris yells.

“I hope you’re not mad”,mommy picks up her slipper and throws it at him but he ducks and it hits the wall instead.

“Adelola. Stop”,daddy tells her.

Mommy throws both daddy and Idris dirty looks before leaning back on her seat and remaining completely silent.

“Yo I ordered pizza, half yours, half mine. Let’s go do our homework before that video call”,Idris tells Aremu who hums.

“Aremu”,Azeez runs over to him while jumping up and down.

“Hey”,Aremu smiles and picks him up.

Yousif looks at them and frowns.

“Idris”,I whisper. He looks at me so I signal over him to do the same for Yousif but the boy just acted like he ain’t see me.

“This boy is actually such a jerk like”,Fawaz chuckles lowly.

“Hey Yousif”,Aremu picks him up after putting down Azeez.

Yousif instantly smiles and waves.

“What y’all doing?“,he asks the two.

“We just finished reading. We’re going to play with my car now”,Yousif tells him.

“Nize one. Well I’ll see y’all later yeah”.

“Okay. Bye”,the boys run back into the playroom.

“Idris would it kill you to act like you care about your own nephew?“,I snap.

“Thanks Aremu”.

“It ight”he shrugs

“Actually it would kill me. MENTALLY. I don’t do kids. We know that”,Idris says.

“You’re actually a jerk”,I tell him.

“Okay and? Am supposed to feel offended? Nize one”.

I shake my head then just ignore his stupid self.

“Wait Aremu can you fix the TV? It’s not turning on”,Yousif yells.

“Go play with your car then. We got things to do”,Idris pushes Aremu towards the steps.

“I wasn’t talking to you. Your name isn’t Aremu. Now is it?“,Yousif asks.

I snicker and look at Idris who spins around so fast you’d think the nigga was having a heart attack.

“What did you say?“.

“If you touch him. Wallahi you’ll see what I’ll do to you”,I warn Idris who flicks Yousif’s forehead.

“Get yo lil behind back in yo toy car”,he tells Yousif who glares at him then huffs and storms back into the play room.

“You’re actually an ass”,Aremu shakes his head.

“Oh actually ma. Knowing how you are, if you end up forcing me to not play ball. Then imma do what aunt Jumoke does. She’s cool and so is her job”,Idris tells her then smirks as he makes his way up the stairs.

“Sure. Her”mommy rolls her eyes.

Yeah, mommy is low key jealous. Even the blind can see that. And Idris knew that. That’s why he said it.