Addiction

39

Tuesday

"He's divorced." I was sitting cross-legged next to Melissa on her bed.

"That's great news. So why do you look...not great?"

"I talked to Isabella. His ex-wife."

"What, why?"

"She broke into his apartment."

"Oh my God. Psycho much?"

I laughed. "Yeah." I looked down at my lap. "But she said I didn't know him at all. He's hiding something from me. He said we could talk about it tonight. But what if...what if it's something that I can't handle?"

"Penny." She put her hand on my knee. "He's your first boyfriend. If it's something you can't handle, then so what?"

"It's not what I expected. We've gotten so serious so fast."

"I know." She sighed. "I still don't get it. What happened that night? I thought you two were done."

The fight. "I thought he had broken up with me. Apparently he hadn't."

"Which involves Tyler because you two can't keep your hands off each other?" She gave me a mischievous smile.

"Yeah. Actually we had sex."

"What?! When? During the party?"

"Right before James showed up."

"So..."

"So?"

"So...what the hell, Penny? How did you go from having s*x with Tyler to getting back together with James?"

"He explained everything to me. He said he was trying to protect me. He never stopped wanting to be with me."

"He ignored you for weeks. He acted like you didn't exist. He...hurt you. Penny, I've never seen you like that before."

"I know." I closed my eyes and leaned against the wall. "I didn't mean to fall in love with my professor."

Melissa laughed.

I opened one eye, glanced at her smiling at me, and closed it again.

"Penny." She grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "You can't help who you fall in love with."

"Which is why I'm worried about tonight."

"How bad could it be? You've hung out with him so much. If it was bad you would have seen it."

"You're right." I looked at her for a minute. "Have you talked to Tyler?"

"I haven't really seen him since the hospital. He's a big boy though. He'll be fine."

I looked down at my lap.

"Hey," she said. "You have to make the choice that's right for you. So if dating your recently divorced, brooding professor is what you want, then own it."

"You're always right about everything. Except your advice about getting under someone else."

"It worked out in the end, didn't it?"

"Yeah, it did." I smiled to myself.

***

After having dinner with Melissa and catching up some more I finally got a text from Professor Hunter: "I'm outside."

"I've gotta go," I said to Melissa and slid off my bed.

"Penny. It won't be that bad. Whatever it is, you probably already know it."

I smiled at her. "See you later." I closed the door behind me. It felt like my heart was beating out of my chest. He was divorced. I should be happy right now, not nervous. I opened up the door to my dorm and saw his black Audi.

He stepped out of it and walked around to the passenger side door. Instead of opening it, he pulled me in close.

"Someone will see..."

He placed his lips on mine, silencing me. He kissed me hard and I kissed him back. It was like he hadn't kissed me in weeks, not hours. When he pulled away I was breathless. I knew my face was flushed.

"You look so beautiful."

"You look so handsome," I said. He was wearing jeans and a dress shirt. The top few buttons on his shirt were undone.

He opened up my door for me. When I got in he immediately closed it and walked around to his side. He got in and buckled his seatbelt. But he didn't put the car into drive.

"Are we going to your place?" I asked.

"It's too stifling."

"Maybe we can go for a walk?"

"We can't. Not here."

"You just kissed me outside of my dorm. It's dark. It's fine."

"Okay." He pulled the car into a parking spot and got out. I got out before he had a chance to open up my door for me. He eyed me curiously.

"I'm not used to dating a gentleman."

"I know." He smiled at me. He grabbed my hand and together we walked toward the green. The area between the dorms was filled with a manicured lawn, walkways, and benches. He held my hand as we walked on one of the brick paths. It was chilly and there were only a few other people out. Our feet crunched on the fallen leaves. When we reached a bench that seemed particularly shadowed, he gestured for me to sit down. He looked down at me for a second and then sat down next to me.

"I need to know exactly what she said to you this morning."

"She already knew about me."

"I didn't..."

"I know. She made it clear that you didn't do much talking last time you saw her." I shrugged.

He sighed. "I'm so, so sorry."

"No, it's fine. Really. I see the appeal."

He frowned at me.

"Yeah, I'm joking. She's horrible."

He put his hand on my knee. "There was a new employee at the front desk. He's been fired."

"James, it wasn't his fault."

"Yes, it was."

I wanted to argue with him. He couldn't go around getting people fired for no reason. The man at the front desk had probably asked Isabella for her I.D. Her last name was still Hunter. But I had to choose my battles with him. And tonight I only wanted to talk about what he was keeping from me.

"She said you only want things you can't have. That's why you like me. Because I'm a student."

"But I do have you."

"She made it seem like you'll get bored with me and move onto something else."

"I'm not going to do that, Penny."

"I know. You wanted to know what she said." I grabbed his hand. "She said that you're addicted to me."

"I am."

"She made it seem like that wasn't a good thing."

He squeezed my hand but didn't say anything.

"And she said you were withholding information from me. That's it. We didn't talk for that long."