It was a beautiful Saturday night. The sky was clear, and the stars twinkled along. It felt like one of those nights when you knew something good was about to happen. I had no doubt about it because I was going to the best place in the world – church.
I've been a devoted Christian my entire life. I neither drank, smoked nor fornicated. I had no idea why anyone would want to damage their body with those sinful acts. It made no sense. Anyway, we are all responsible for ourselves and I shouldn't judge anyone.
I continued walking along the street, thinking about the practice I was going for. It was practice for the choir. I was going to take a lead solo in the next day's service. I loved singing in the choir. It always elated my spirit. I felt like I was one with the higher powers any time I sang – which was a lot. I loved my life and will never give up my faith regardless of the temptation.
I must have been distracted by my thoughts because I didn't see the man in front of me until I had bumped into him.
"I'm so sorry, sir." I apologized, looking up at the face of the man I had accidentally hit.
I never should have done that because I don't know what came over me in that moment. He looked around thirty-five with icy blue eyes. They drew me in. It was a sinful pull, I could tell. I said a short prayer and rebuked him right there. I wanted to turn around and leave but I couldn't. Why couldn't I?
The man looked at me and smiled.
"It's okay, young lady. You don't have to apologize."
I smiled at him in return and batted my eyelashes in a seductive manner.
"My God, Bella! What has gotten into you?"
I couldn't believe what I just did. I flirted with an actual breathing man. Why did I do that? Why did the sight of him make my n*****s hard?
I don't know if he read my thoughts, but he was looking straight at my n*****s when I looked at him again. They responded to him in a way filled with shameful lust. This time, I rebuked myself. I couldn't let this happen. I had to stop this before it progressed into something worse. This had nothing to do with the devil. This was me letting myself get pulled in by an older man.
"A hot older man."
I rebuked myself one more time. Then, I changed my mind about rebuking myself. Maybe if I just accepted the truth instead of denying it, I could overcome this temptation. It was a bad idea. As soon as I accepted the fact that he was hot, my n*****s became even harder and pushed against the thin fabric of my chiffon blouse.
"Lord, you have beautiful breasts." He said to me.
"Thank you." I replied, my cheeks instantly flushing red.
My eyes widened in surprise immediately after that. What had I done? I had just thanked someone for making an unrighteous comment about my breasts. But was he telling the truth? Were they really beautiful? Why was I blushing?