Almost Always You

Chapter 9

We got settled in. I took out my laptop and notes, while Xander opened his laptop.

"I suggest we divide the assignment into two sections. One section can be done by you and the other by me. If we have any doubts, we can ask each other, and we can compare the notes we made at the end. What do you think?" I asked.

"I thought we were going to do this together."

"We still are, but that doesn't mean we have to work together on every little thing. We don't have to meet frequently."

"I think you don't want to spend time with me, El. What's your problem? Do you hate me?"

"I don't hate you, Xander. It's just that if we see each other frequently, then everyone will think we're having s*x, and I don't want to be labeled as a slut."

"No one will think that. Everyone knows how desperately I want to pass this class. No one will think we're having s*x. And I feel offended. Are you embarrassed because people might think you're having s*x with me?" he asked in a rather deep voice.

"Xander, you're taking my point the wrong way. I never said anything about you..."

I was cut off by Xander's laugh.

"El, baby, you have to stop taking everything so seriously."

I was relieved.

Do I take everything seriously? I thought.

Mercy had said the same thing.

"I can't do this alone. I want your help, so please don't abandon me," he said.

"Alright, drama queen. We'll do this together. No need to be so overdramatic," I said, smiling.

We worked sincerely for half an hour. After that, Xander got bored and started distracting me.

"Let's take a break now."

"It's only been forty-five minutes, Xander. We can't take a break."

"Oh, come on, El. I'm really tired. I think I'm going to pass out. I'm dehydrated, and I can't get up. Can you fetch me some water, please?"

"Always been so dramatic," I said and got up.

I went downstairs. Everyone was still there.

"How's it going?" Pete asked.

"It was going well at first, but now he's being a drama queen."

"It's expected. He'll convince you to stop," Nikki said sweetly.

I found it hard to hate this girl. I just smiled at her.

"Well, that's not going to work on me."

I grabbed two bottles of water from the refrigerator and went upstairs.

When I opened Xander's room, I saw that all my things had been placed back in my bag, and Xander was lying on his bed, scrolling through his phone.

I closed the door a little louder than I intended.

"Why did you pack everything? If you don't take this assignment seriously, we'll both end up failing."

"Relax. We have plenty of time. Come here. I want to show you something."

I walked toward the bed and sat far away from Xander. He noticed and got up to sit beside me.

We were very close now.

He showed me his phone.

"Look, it's Emma."

Emma was Xander's little sister. She was only a year old when they moved to London. Now she was older and very cute and chubby.

"Oh my God! She's so cute."

"It was a fancy-dress competition at her school. She dressed up as a butterfly."

"That's the cutest butterfly I've ever seen."

"Would you like to meet her?"

"Yes, and I'd also like to meet your parents. It's been so long."

"Whoa! Hold up, girl. At least take me out on a date first," he said, laughing as if he'd just made the funniest joke in the world.

"That's the worst joke I've ever heard."

"We can go this weekend and stay a night there. My parents would be really happy to see you, especially my mom."

"Oh. I don't want to intrude. It might be a problem for your family if I stayed."

"What? No. My mom loves you. They might not even need me when they see you," he said, smiling.

"Okay. Only because I'm desperate for a home-cooked meal."

Xander showed me some other pictures and videos of Emma. She was the cutest kid I'd ever seen.

Xander was scrolling through his phone when he suddenly asked, "Why are you still a virgin, El?"

"What?"

"I mean, you said you were in a relationship, right?"

I nodded.

"Then why didn't you guys ever have s*x?"

"I don't know, Xander. We were both immature and inexperienced. What Adam and I had was more like an innocent relationship. We cared about each other, but we weren't ready to take things further."

"So, what are you going to do? Wait for the right guy who will love you and marry you?"

"No. I'm not that type of girl. I just want someone who knows what they're doing. He should be experienced and make sure I'm comfortable and satisfied. And, of course, no feelings included."

He looked at me for a moment.

"You're describing someone like me."

"Wait. What?"

"Come on, El. I'm exactly the kind of guy you just described. But if we ever did anything, we'd have to be completely clear about what it meant and what it didn't mean."

I thought about it.

He was right.

But it was Xander, and that was the problem. It would be hard for me not to catch feelings for him.

"Okay," I said quietly.

He looked surprised.

"But I have some conditions," I added.

"Okay. Let's hear them."

"First, we need to be completely safe and responsible. I don't want either of us taking unnecessary risks."

"Fair enough."

"Second, no one knows about this. I don't want people talking about my private life."

"Alright."

"I mean it, Xander. No one."

"Deal."

He thought for a moment before adding, "I have one condition too. Neither of us gets to use this arrangement to hurt the other person."

I looked at him.

"Okay."

For a moment, neither of us said anything.

I knew I was making a decision that could completely complicate everything between us.

But a part of me still wanted to know what it would be like to finally be with the boy I'd had feelings for for years.

Xander smiled.

"Then I guess we have a deal."

Oh boy.