Emergence of Verity

FEAT

Part 1

It's been days after I broke down, still guilty for my poor judgement. I was burning hot from high fever as I woke up around midnight. I can hear ruffles of dry leaves outside. Then crunching of fallen autumn leaves as rushing heavy footsteps walked towards the forest. I stood a jolt and ran outside. I watched as Portus' silhouette disappeared behind the dense thorny trees. I grabbed the nearest fur coat I could reach and ran to him as fast as I could, only wearing a silky turquoise blue night dress. Hoping to catch up to him, and go wherever he's going.

"Portus!" I called for him to slow down. He stopped walking and looked at my direction from where my voice was coming from. "Tati? What are doing outside?" he asked with a worried voice. "I heard you stepping out, and thought I should follow you." I admitted shyly. "What? Why?" he asked, now confused. "Oh, I just felt like doing it." I said and laughed awkwardly. "But you don't look fine. You shouldn't have." He said as he touched my forehead with his cold hands hoping he wouldn't notice my fading hands. "You don't feel fine either. You're burning! he exclaimed."

"That's cause your hands are cold." I laughed timidly realizing my mistake for mentioning his hands. "I don't think so, go on. Go back now. Before Gramps get worried." He advised as he turned his back. "But Gramps said I should seek my happiness! I heard your conversation with Gramps. You were looking for a certain tonic that'll help me leave this place. Right?" I whispered. "So, you heard it." He said as he faced me again. "Then you understand the dangers of leaving the comfort of Gramps cabin?" He inquired. "Yeah, I sure do." I replied. "Then you need to go back now. You can't keep wandering around on that state. You're still sick from all that lost blood." He said looking away. "What if I disappear? While you're away looking for that tonic, we'll never know what will happen." I lamented my worries. "You shouldn't have cut your wrist then." he said cynically.

"I'll find the cure myself." I uttered under my infuriated breathing. "You've got lots of pride, don't you?" he muttered. "Yeah, I do." I sneered back. "Are you sure you're not going to change to a more comfortable clothe?" he asked looking at my night dress. "You're gonna leave me behind if I go back." I mumbled quite annoyed. "I won't." he said looking disappointed. "You're just trying to banish me. I don't trust you." I snickered as I walked past him and towards to deeper forest. "Don't come if you dont trust me then." he scorned back. I just rolled my eyes as I walked further away from Gramps warm cabin, I looked back and I swear I might have seen his silhouette, watching us leave. I am sorry to leave him like this. But I know I needed to go away from comfort and find the tonic myself.

"Why did you insist on coming. I can certainly do it on my own." He uttered as we walked down the steeper forest ground. "I can't keep waiting for a change to arrive. I need to make the change happen." I uttered quite breathless. "You're so proud, aren't you?" he chortled as he held out his arms trying to reach for me. "Sure am." I said as I slapped his hand away. "You shouldn't be ashamed of accepting a little bit of help." he stated as he paved the way. "I don't need one." I own up walking ahead of him as if leading the way.

"Uh, I think you turned the wrong way." He realized after a thirty-minute walk. "We seemed to be heading towards Norte." He mumbled as he checked his worn-out compass. "You should've told me earlier!" I exclaimed exasperated. "You said you need no help." He smirked as he turned right. "How dare you." I mumbled under my breath. "I heard you." He grinned as he led the way.

An hour, then another hour we walked further away from Gramps home. I can feel my breathing weakening as the ground become steeper and the thorny trees become denser. I looked up trying to enjoy the calming breeze, I was expecting to see the twinkle of the stars only to see the bushy leaves of tall trees. Quite disappointing.

We climbed farther barely seeing the way. "Have we reached at least half way?" I asked breathless as I felt my numbing knees. "You're tired, aren't you?" he grinned as if it was funny. "Obviously." I said stopping from my tracks. "We can't rest here, its dangerous. Hold onto me." He replied as he held out his hand. I started walking without reaching his hands. "Okay then." I looked at him as he smiled a painful smile and walked away.

We camped after climbing the second hill from gramps cabin. "So, it's safe here?" I asked him unenthusiastically. "That's the Canopus, so it means were on the right track." He said as he points up the big bright star. "I didn't ask about that star. I asked if were safe here." I said mockingly. "Could be." He muttered as he tries and find a good place to put up the camping tent.

"Hey, can you help find some sticks? To warm us up, you know." He told me as he led the way towards the trees. "kay." I said then went towards the drier trees to pluck up all the dry twigs I could find.

I was calmly sitting down by the fire, watching it dance willingly as the soft cold breeze blew the nights gale. Feeling the warmth coming from the fires ember, I now felt more alive than the first time I came here.

For a moment, I thought I was imagining seeing my face's reflection through the seething fire. Not until the fire raged up so great, I can feel it licking my skin. Its red, orange, and green fervor is mirrored through my blank eyes. For some reason, I don't feel scared nor anxious, I was hypnotized.

I didn't dare move, nor shout for Portus to come to me. I felt like staying in the warmth this fire is offering my body. It's hot and burning but not painful enough, it is more comforting than it is not. I heard Portus loud thumps as he run towards me and covered and wrapped me with his sleeping bag. We rolled down the ground with so much force, but he still hugged me so I don't hurt myself.

"Are you all right?" he asked as he worriedly check my arms for burns. "I am." I said as I blinked and looked back at the fire quite wobbly. "What happened to me?" I asked all confused. "You didn't realize what happened. Did you?" he asked with a wrinkling worry on his forehead. "I won't ask you if I did." I slurred under my breath.

"You ought to be careful. I saw your reflection on the raging fire." He advised as he helped me sat up. "What do you mean?" I asked with my still fuzzy mind. "It's already a bad thing you were getting eaten by that fire. All the more getting hypnotized by your own reflection on it." He exclaimed as he stood up and hold out his arm.

"How's that a bad thing? The fires pretty comforting for me actually." I countered as I gazed back at the dancing fire. "Stop looking at it!" he shouted as he covered my eyes with his hands and led me towards the tent. "Stay here. Don't come out." He warned stiffly as he heads out. I heard him stomping harshly before the light completely went out.

I welcomed him with the question: "Why'd you kill the fire?" "It's not safe for both of us." He whispered. "It's just fire. How are we supposed to keep warm now?" I said cynically. "If it hasn't sink in to your damned mind, you were almost taken over by that damn fire! You were almost swallowed whole! Hell knows whatever worse case you be in." he screamed right up my face.

"Woah! You're getting worked up too much! I was just asking! I truly didn't know what happened nor what that fire is doing!" I refuted screaming to him as well.

"Go to sleep." He said a little calmer now. "Fine." I said as I sat down my camping bed and dozed off.

By dawn, I was woken by a screaming Portus. "Ahh! Tati! Wake up! We gotta get out of here!" he shouted from outside miles away as if he was running. Still a bit dazed, and not able to catch what he said, I took a bit of my time to fold my bed. I was almost up when our tent got busted by arrows everywhere.

With a blast, the tent went flying up ten feet in the air. Seeing I was surrounded by seven to eight ugly big nosed bulky horses five times bigger than I am. I stood up, trying to find any sign of Portus. "Lookin fo you boyfriend eh?" said a toothy fat orc-like creature manning one of the bulky horses. Eh? Oh no! Not boyfriend, no." I said grinning trying to hide my fear and disgust from smelling their rotting flesh scent confirming my assumptions of them being orcs.

"Can keep 'im, Ye? Lookin' delicious!" Said another toothy but thin and frail looking orc behind another horse as he moved sideways to show his capture of the bounded Portus. "Y-Yeah, sure." I replied nervously as I watched Portus stirred here and there and looked back at me. "Sorry!" I mouthed to him as they carried him to the trees.

I know I was stupid for doing what I did, but still, I can't fight them all nor could I let myself get captured as well, I thought I'll just get him out of wherever they're taking him. So, I decided to follow behind careful not to be seen. Trees after trees I walked further and farther from our camping site. As the trees became thinner, and the paths have become wider their ugly bulky big-nosed horses started galloping faster and faster until they were nowhere to be seen. "I didn't think about that." I ran after them, but my feet are no match to their horses.

It was almost dusk when I arrived in a clearing after trying to follow behind their tracks to no avail. Now, I'm hungry, tired and sleepy; and I left all our baggages behind only carrying a water jug hoping to last me a day, but it didn't. I sat beneath a wide tree and fell asleep.

I was woken up by faint hurried whispers as if they're coming from small people. I look around still feeling sleepy but couldn't see anyone. I could only see six small dusts of lights floating around. "Show yourself." I commanded. The lights swirled and swiveled into six small fairies.

"You shouldn't be here." Said a twinkly eyed green fairy. "I know, but my friend was kidn*pped by orcs. I was trying to follow them. Got lost." I laughed hesitantly.

"The tricks are almost rounding this area. You have to leave." Said a muscular purple fairy. "But I've got nowhere to go." I replied nervously laughing.

"They're coming." Said the sleepy grey fairy as hustle of leaves are heard a few tree trunks from the clearing. With a soft swish the fairies changed back into dusty lights then fluttered towards the twigs hidden behind the bushes of trees. I was left alone sitting down the roots awaiting the arrival of the tricks they were all talking about.

Blank faced grey eyed foxes with flaming blue tails arrived like the swiftest gale, stood proudly in a cluster of five tricks surrounding me. I was left stunned, as if I was hypnotized by their blank grey eyes. I stood up and walked with the tricks when I heard their commanding voices inside my head. I was getting imprisoned for wandering in their forest at twilight.

My head was spinning from every word they said to me, as if all of it were factual, my head absorbed them and let them sink in so deep, they got a hold and control even my slightest movements. I wanted to get away and have control over my body, but even that thought was diminished into nonsense.

I was brought in a tribe looking camp where tents after tents are lined up. There were blank faces everywhere as if they were in haze doing all random chores to keep everything in that place moving. All were gloomy ghost-like familiar faces but I can't pinpoint who they were. I tried everything I could to stray from the tricks mind controlling so I catch anyones attention. But to my demise, they seemed clueless to my arrival. Being attentive to my own thoughts and fighting the foxes control made my mind so boggled and weak that I fainted.

I woke up inside a worn-out tent with patches everywhere to hide all sorts of holes. As if my veins and muscles have minds on its own, they moved and tended to the bite marks of my wrists I didn't notice existed before. Perhaps the tricks couldn't command my body to enter the cabin while passed out that they bit me instead. I stood up to my feets own accord then went outside to tend on chores I thought I should be doing.

I kept trying to fight these overwhelming controls inside my own head. But the more I kept trying, the more I weaken my own will. I seem to be more obedient in every command. More submissive even to most dangerous tasks. I even seem to be getting lost to my purpose, I should have been out saving Portus from the orcs. But I might be the one who needs saving.

I didn't even realize what I had been going through day and night. Having not noticed if I had slept nor I woke up, I just kept doing this and doing that, whatever the voice in my head demanded me to do. Every command seemed to diminish my own existence, as if I was an object made to oblige and answer to every call.

Until that full moon, I felt my muscles and veins started complaining from lack of sleep and unrest. My head started swarming with all the emotions I haven't felt for heaven knows how long. It was hunger for my stomach, twitching from my knees and joints, my skin breaking out all types of boils and impurities, my eyes were strained and bloodshot, and my face were as pale as the faces I saw the first time I entered the camp. I sat up and wondered how I was able to feel on my own. I haven't been able to feel alive this whole time.

My head was still spinning quite bit from all the traumas of mind controlling but all I wanted was to run away, faraway, so far, I wouldn't be able to remember anything. I don't know if I had the guts to cross those tricks nor the energy to out run them but it's better to try than not.

"Raid! Raid!" I heard hurried shouting from every direction. I stood up as quickly as I could ignoring my aching body. I saw people after people running everywhere. Horror were painted on their pale faces; I didn't even realize they were the same hypnotized people I was with this whole time.

There were misty silver bloods spilled all over the place then dead foxes everywhere. "Whats happening?" I asked the first woman I came across with carrying an obviously sick child. "Here, let me help you." I said as I help her shouldered the child. "Vipers!" she whispered to me panting. "They got loose; they were killing all the campers they come across with. Even the tricks were wounded, some were dead, when they tried – ahh!" she explained before a thorny – obviously venomous tail smashed her whole body. She dropped dead with splattering warm red blood.

I couldn't walk forward because of her weight and the child's, "Leave us." The kid said sadly. "I cant!" I replied as I tugged her away from the dead woman. "You don't have to do this. Go on, leave!" She pushed me away. "Please! Come with me I can get you out of here!" I insisted and begged but we were interrupted by a loud gallop coming from my back.

"Tati! Come on!" Portus came bustling out the bushy trees riding a large bulky big nosed horse which I saw with the orcs from before. "What are you -" "No time to explain! Come on!" he exclaimed in an utterly hurried voice.

"Help me then!" I replied as I continued tugging the child. We were just a few seconds early before another viper spotted us and started attacking. We were able to hop on the horse, then galloped our way out of the camp.

"Wow! I helped you out of the vipers when you allowed me be taken away by the orcs!" he cried sarcastically amid the noise. "We've got to help them." I said out loud as I looked back and watched everyone get smashed down to their deaths. "At least some of them." I added realizing we cannot save everyone.

"We cant." Portus opposed. "But –" "He's right. We can't " The kid cut me in before I could say anything. "We should at least try." I insisted as I faced Portus. But he only looked at me dejectedly then shook his head.

I looked away finally accepting my defeat and trying to stop my tears from falling. But I couldn't ignore the painful screams from all those people; they have suffered enough. I tried to hop off the galloping horse but Portus caught me mid-flight. "I told you! We can't do anything about them!" he cried exasperated.

"Please!" I wept as I tried to silence my ears from all the agonizing screams. "Please!" I pleaded and pleaded but he didn't listen nor obliged.

I didn't stop crying, even after arriving in the tree top where Portus took us in. He offered me a drink, but I feel devastatingly wrecked, I didn't even acknowledge his presence. "I'm sorry." He mourned. But I didn't budge, I don't think he was sorry at all.

I was blankly staring into void reminiscing the excruciating cries of help from all those campers, after all those painful will-less days, endless chores and mind controls, they died painfully unjust.

I thought I wouldn't be able to, but I cried myself to sleep. Perhaps I was too exhausted to stay wide-awake.

The next morning, the kid stirred me up, it was a cold peaceful dawn. "Thank you for saving me." She said with twinkling eyes. "I wish it was the same for everyone." I grieved devastated. "But we can't play hero for everyone. We need saving ourselves." She mourned reminiscing our almost impossible escape. "You could have died if you insisted saving everyone." She added gloomily. "Guess I should have done that." I whispered in response. "I'm sorry." She said before finally leaving.

I felt guilty for whatever I might have made her feel. But the horror seemed to struck me hard and deep. I couldn't seem to put it out of my head; every scream and every cry seemed to have distinguishable voice that retains deep within my memories. I just couldn't help but relive the moments I had the chance to save those still alive but didn't.

For days, we travelled and continued travelling. But still I was stuck and haunted with the screams and cries. We were hopelessly wandering but Portus doesn't seem to mind at all. He was diligently making our food; tasting if it was edible, and tirelessly rounding the area if it was safe to stay for the night.

"Tati, it's been days." Portus uttered so suddenly as we were packing our beds. "Yeah, been days since those innocent people died." I whispered vacantly. "You still blame me, don't you?" he anguished. "No, I blame myself." I uttered.

We were travelling towards the extraneous mountains behind the seventh hill we've trekked so far. I don't know if the journey was of any use at all, I kept thinking, I should have stayed with gramps at his shack and stayed there for good.

After climbing almost half of the hill, we took our rest and lunch beneath an old oak tree. The lone kid we got to save from the vipers travelled along with us. "Do you mind?" she asked pointing at the root where I was sitting down. "Barely." I stated with pursed lips trying to be as friendly as I possibly can.

"I'm sorry. I know you still blame me for not choosing to save those people." She stated with an obvious sincerity. "I don't blame anyone." I contradicted her. "I just couldn't get over the fact that we get to live quite well after watching them suffer like that. That's so unfair." I clarified. "They suffered enough already being imprisoned by those tricks. It's not their fault not to be able to live their own life. But the fact that their chance to do so was taken away like that it's so unfair!" I mourned further controlling my deepening breaths. "But it's not our fault either. You can't keep blaming yourself from faults you have no control of. You should let go of those people." She advised trying to calm me from weeping. "But their faces kept haunting me. Their screams kept echoing inside my head!" I sobbed even more. "It's your guilt from your memory that's haunting you, not those people. I know it's not easy but you have to let go and move forwards." She smiled so kindly reminding me of that day.

That day... Yes, I was reminded of when we: my sister, Portus and I were on our bikes on our way to buy cotton candies that gramps warned us not to buy. Of how I let my sister get killed that day, I saw gramps standing under the street lamp just a few meters away from us. He saw me did that most hideous thing a person could to his own kin. His eyes, which has twinkled so ever kindly was aloof, as he run to my sisters bloody lifeless body on the dry hard ground. Everyone blamed and abandoned me, even my own dad. I didn't truly feel anything back then, it must have been the trauma, that I buried my own memories and started to believe I really did kill her that day. But gramps, who saw what happened gave me a chance to live. He had seen things others didn't, but his eyes never glimmered the same.

"Please be happy Tati." The kid smiled gentler clouding the horrors of the ghostly faces. The echoing screams of terror was buried behind Stephania; my older sister who died years ago from an accident I was a witness of. If I saved her back then, both of us could have died, and that's what haunts me. I knew I was partly responsible for playing around the street, but my guilt for being alive stayed with me.