Luna of the Golden Moon

Green Ribbons

"And, are you sure about this, I mean?" I was standing outside in the decorated garden, or what was supposed to be the wedding scene tomorrow, with Beta Kate giving me a nod as she was happy. I sighed, relieved she wasn't freaking out the way I would. My dress was green, just like the ribbons further away from the arch—though I frowned at them, realizing that wasn't the color I'd told Delta Vivian to send word for. Did she make them darker on purpose?

All around us, the garden was alive with preparations. Deltas hurried past, arms full of white chairs and crates of glass lanterns. Buckets of fresh-cut roses, peonies, and wildflowers lined the paths, their colors bright against the green lawn. The air was thick with the scent of lilacs and sweet peas, and I could hear laughter and the clinking of vases as arrangements were set on the tables under the trees.

"Yes, I still can't believe it, Luna," Kate said, her eyes wide as she took in the scene—arches being draped with greenery, petals scattered along the aisle, and the beginnings of a floral chandelier being assembled above the dance floor. "A week ago, I was just trying to feel safe, and now…"

I smiled, though I felt a little jealous of her. All these flowers, lights, and colors—it was all for her and Brad. I wanted everything to be perfect, but I couldn't shake the worry that I was going overboard, especially for Brad, who might not care about all these little touches. What if he thought it was too much? What if he just wanted something simple, and I'd turned it into a fairytale garden?

Kate's happiness was obvious, especially as she showed off her new mark as first Beta. Brad was already making changes—organizing schedules, setting up an obstacle course for the Betas, and somehow managing to look thoroughly at ease as he strode through the chaos to join us. He gave Kate a look full of love, and I felt a pang of envy at how simple it seemed for them.

"First Beta," I teased as he got lost in Kate's eyes, the matebond making the world fall away for a moment. Around us, Deltas continued to bustle—stringing up fairy lights, arranging bouquets, and checking the placement of every chair and table. The garden was a whirlwind of color and movement, and I felt both proud and anxious, hoping I hadn't done too much.

"Luna, oh sorry…" He bowed his head down to my smirk, seeing some of the other Betas give him a look of approval, since he had stepped up as first Beta, people had taken a liking to him, not everyone, of course, but in general.

"And you, aren't your shift over for Luna duty?" Brad didn't care that I was there, giving a stern stare to Mark, who refused to leave me. He did, and he was proud of that, not caring about the first Beta to my sigh, he would regret that, since if Caleb got word he wasn't obeying orders, liking them or not, there would be consequences.

"The Alpha told me to never leave her, and since he is my boss and not you…" I sighed again, hearing the spitfire.

Mark was a soldier, and he was dutiful, but that didn't mean he needed to sleep, or eat, or do anything other than guard me!

"The Alpha isn't here, I am, and as the acting first Beta, I am ordering you to return to the barracks and get some sleep. I will take over before Beta John takes your spot." Beta Brad wasn't backing away, using his full power against Mark, hating him with all his might, and I have no idea why. Beta Brad was great, and he filled his role so well that even Caleb was impressed.

"I like Kyle more… he had some f*****g style at least…" Mark was muttering, with my heart sinking, hearing him say the last name I wanted to hear right now. Kyle had been the first Beta, but he never really cared about them, not like Brad did, giving me a look like he wanted my permission to go and punish the Beta for disobeying him, with me shaking my head, no.

Mark needed time; he was stubborn, but he was a good beta, one of the best around here.

"All that kindness is going to eat you up…" Beta Brad looked sinister before walking back to his mate, losing all his sternness and just giving her love, her blushing, my heart racing over how much he acted like Caleb, or maybe he was used to Alpha Victor. We all saw the fallout of that.

Beta Kate was talking, showing him everything around him with light in her eyes. Still, he didn't look at that, only her, his smile becoming bigger when she got excited over something, a flower she loved, the beautiful arc, the Deltas still putting out chairs… I blinked, trying not to start crying again, seeing them together. How did they just match? Like he knew she was too scared to talk to anyone, so he spoke to her, but didn't stop her when she tried, or Beta Kate already knew her mate's mood, making him kinder to anyone around compared to when he wasn't.

"Mila, are you crying, baby?" I said no over the bondlink, walking slowly away from the wedding, hating myself for making it look so beautiful when the truth was, I did want this all for me, and not for Beta Kate and Brad. Hadn't I been thinking about me and Caleb would be the ones who would be standing down that arc, all the pack looking at us, me smiling and Caleb looking proud.

"Baby, you are crying. What's wrong? Is it the baby?" Caleb got worried, standing up inside the office where he was right now, on a conference call with other Alphas. I didn't need to be there, so instead I had walked outside to check on the preparations, or that's what I told myself, at least. Maybe I just wanted to get hurt. So stupid.

"I'm not crying, Caleb, I'm just…" I didn't know what to say, seeing him at a distance, standing in the window like he knew I could see him, making a trying smile that felt worse. This was my dream wedding, and it wasn't even mine.

"That's it, I'm telling the Alphas I have an emergency and..." I was shaking my head, sitting down and watching the Betas following me at a distance, affected by my sadness, their mood was down because they were closer to me, making me feel worse, leaning back on my hands and watching the sky, everything was so perfect right now, and still, I didn't feel good. Was that bad, me not being happy with everything around me?

"I want to get married, Caleb…" I wasn't crying anymore, just sniffing and feeling sorry for myself, knowing just how childish I was acting, the betas probably snorting hearing me, but they didn't. Keeping their distance with my wolf pushing them back, that and Beta Brad had told everyone to stop stepping inside my space around the clock, they were to protect me, not monitor my every step and invade my privacy.

"… and we are, baby, please, I told you…" I snapped off Caleb's plea, not wanting to hear that one more time. I didn't want to listen; he said that every time, and it was starting to drive me just as crazy as the rest of this wedding planning was.

"When?" I sat up straighter, my wolf eyes out and pushing back even more with all my feelings. I was raised human, and this was important to me, maybe more than he would understand.

"I don't know, okay? Is that what you wanted to hear? I don't know Emilia, maybe when we are not facing serious threats, people won't come for you for being an alpha!" Caleb snapped back, stressed over having the conference call still on with other men talking in the background, on mute, making me stare out into the woodlands with my gold eyes, disappointed, aimless. He was saying never. That is what he really meant. We would never get married, not even a small ceremony with just a few people, and absolutely nothing like this, a big one that took time and money.

"Okay." My voice was hopeless, hearing the sigh on the other side of the bond, feeling my mood being low and damp, my feet bare walking over the grass. Turning my hands on the green dress, I guess it was just one more thing I had to sacrifice to be the Luna of the golden moon.

"Mila, listen to me, for once, please! I won't let you come in harm's way just because of a wedding, you are my mate and…" I didn't listen to him anymore, shutting down the link and knowing he would be insanely mad at me for doing that. We had been at peace for so long, since I found out I was pregnant, but this. He was not going to tell me this was for my own good when it was his feelings that were being spared.

"Oh, he is not going to like that…" I looked up, seeing Beta Brad standing further away from me, giving me a look as he knew, but how? I never said a word about any of my wishes to anyone other than Caleb.

"Blue dress, right, looked like it was bought from a secondhand store…" I didn't know what to say, with Beta Brad nodding, having his arms loose across him, not fully crossed, just watching me with his eyes, he sure wanted like Kyle was he, since if he was, he would have tried to get closer, giving me a smile and making me feel safe, I felt nothing like that right now. Only lonely.

"That's right… Delta in the blue secondhand dress… "I was smiling, ironically at my own sad words, resting my hands on my belly, giving the strange first Beta another look. Hadn't he somewhere else to be, a future wife who might need him?

"Yes, Mel wasn't happy seeing you, and when she saw Caleb follow you out the door, oh, she wasn't happy…" he smiled more, but it wasn't mocking; it was caring. I shrugged, so he saw me standing in an ugly dress, being chased down by a mate, so what?

"Do you still love her, Melody, I mean?" I had never loved anyone before Caleb, so maybe it was different when the bond took over; perhaps you did feel something for the person you thought was the love of your life before it happened.

"No… that's the sad part. I realized she was gone and everything was just s**t, I didn't love her anymore, not a speck of me loves her, only Kate…" he made a face and his eyes shifting back to the wedding with me sighing, so it was just me then being jealous, Caleb didn't love Katarina. However, he surely acted like he could still remember doing it when he talked about her, and me, he didn't even want to marry, not because we couldn't find a way. No, he was scared of everything.

"... Oh, and thank you, Luna, for all this… I mean, I don't really care, but Kate does. That is the most important thing for me, her happiness…" he stopped talking with me, starting to cry, wanting everyone to leave me, hating him for saying that, hating Caleb for being scared of showing the world my true nature, telling the world I was his and not some Delta. He just had to get mated to and be forced to love.