FOREVER, WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH

Chapter 9

(Jru's POV)

I'm sitting there next to Teine. Holding her hand and talking to her. The doctor said she could hear me and to keep talking to her every day.

It felt really good to talk to her. It was almost like I could hear her.

I was probably losing my mind,but I couldn't stay away from her while she lied there this past week. She was my home. Every piece of me wanted ... No, I needed to be near her. Breathing was getting difficult each day that passed.

"Please wake up, sweetheart. Wake up and yell at me. Tell me I'm selfish and that my dumb decision cost us 5 years that we'll never get back." I cried, I continued to hold her hand and whisper things to her.

"Remember when we were 16 and we were working on Mr.Jenkins farm to save for that truck we wanted?" I asked.

"Well, while we were there, Mr Jenkins had seen us together. I never told you.But he had pulled aside and told me a story about him and his wife," I paused to take breath and finish the story that had helped shape my life.

"He said that when he went to ask for her hand in marriage. Her father asked her how he was going to provide for his daughter. He said he knew with everything in him that she was meant to be married to him. So, he told her father the only thing he could come up with. He told him he was enlisting. He knew he'd get paid while in the service. He went on to tell him that he'd save everything he'd earn and come home to buy a farm..." I took a big breath.

"He served for 2 years and came home. He bought that farm and married his wife with her fathers blessing... When he told me this story. It made me realize i had no idea how I was going to support us.I looked into enlisting in the military. I requested 2 years, I figured I could save it and at least have enough to put down on a little place of our own...2 years, that's all I was going to leave you for. I figured you'd be in school. We'd be apart, but I knew it was for our future." I stop and take a breath. Even saying it outloud now, I still think it was a good idea.

"I procrastinated telling you that I was leaving. Honestly, each day, it got closer I began to hate Mr.Jenkins for putting this thought in my head. Then, before I realized, it was time to check in for camp. You didn't take my badly timed announcement very well at all. And because I failed to speak to you before that day. I couldn't chase you... I reported for duty that evening and was sick with worry for you. I didn't get any response to calls or letters. I just told myself I'd be the best I could and go home to you. Well, that actually backfired. Because I chose to be the best I could, I surpassed even my own wildest dreams. It ended up being a call from my super to recruiting that changed seen everything. I went from a term of 2 years to 5 years in a blink of an eye. They said they had the right to extend needed services. I promise I died that night, I held your picture and cried like a baby. Please Teine, wake up love."